lavingroony

do one thing a day that scares you

2012-03-01T17:52:00.002+08:00

I am extremely unhappy with my Intro to Socio tutorial. Like seriously it's the epitome of stupid Singaporean semblances of education. Next tutorial I'm going to record the entire session and explain with verbatim quotes why it makes no sense.

rescind

2012-02-27T01:34:00.002+08:00

So there's this dude, let's call him Asshole.

I hung out with him quite a bit around half a year ago, and he decided that he wanted me to be his girlfriend. (This he revealed the first time we hung out together alone and not in a group with friends, but let's not go there.) He seemed like a really nice (if somewhat blur and innocent) dude.

After going out on a few dates I told him it wasn't working out, and disappeared from his social radar for quite a while.

I dropped by my friend's (let's call him Kena Backstab) birthday party chalet around Christmas, and noticed Asshole was there too - normal since he's one of Kena Backstab's bros - sticking really close to one chick (let's call her Biatch Sneaky). Close as in lying in bed together watching My Little Pony.

Under ordinary circumstances I'd find this quite normal (last Cosfest I had to sleep between him and another guy because we squished 7 people in one room, it's standard chalet space solutions) but knowing how easily distracted this guy is I was slightly alarmed.

Firstly, I didn't really like Biatch Sneaky. Any girl who entertains themselves by watching MLP reruns at a party is pretty much baiting bronies. Secondly, noting that Asshole decided he was madly in love with me before he'd actually spent any time with me, he was being totally baited.

Sure enough, Asshole sent Biatch Sneaky to the bus stop when she was leaving. Knowing Asshole, this was a major sign that he was hitting on her.

That morning I overheard a conversation between Asshole and Kena Backstab. KB was explaining how much he liked some girl. I assumed the girl in question was this other chick I sort of knew, who he was close to. I was horribly tired and braindead and didn't catch the actual name.

Then we went home.

That day or so, I suddenly noticed that Asshole was in a relationship on Facebook with this really nice girl, let's call her Ouch, because she'd been cheated and dumped by one of our guy friends (they made up eventually though). This made me super happy since I'd seen them hanging out together and they were quite adorable, and also dispelled any suspicions about him getting together with Biatch Sneaky.

Then a few days later, I suddenly discovered from friends that Asshole had already been together with Ouch since before Kena Backstab's chalet, and that Asshole was now basically cheating on Ouch.

I was really disturbed. Also my idiot boyfriend wasn't helping. One day I glanced at his Skype to discover that he'd said this to Asshole:

"hey dude i think your future gf is gonna be like this http://stopplayingleague.tumblr.com/"

Basically, that site's owned by a chick who draws comics about herself and her boyfriend, who plays League of Legends. The chick is slightly weird and obsessed, but it's pretty cute.

Note that at the time, Asshole was still attached to Ouch, and it was very obvious that he was cheating on her, and of course both my boyfriend and I knew about it.

Asshole had also been asking my boyfriend for relationship advice (which my boyfriend hadn't had the opportunity to give before that), and since I knew that meant my boyfriend was about the only person who could have any kind of impact on Asshole, I'd been entreating him to tell Asshole to get his shit together.

And that basically sparked off a few hours of me throwing a humongous fit and shouting at my boyfriend for supporting Asshole. Actually, it was only 30 seconds, the rest of the time was spent trying to convince him that a) he was supporting Asshole, and b) it's wrong to encourage a cheater.

Eventually, after a lot of shouting and crying at him, he sort of gave up. (The topic of Asshole's cheating resurfaced in conversation a few times over the next week or so, during which I had to come to terms with the fact that my boyfriend didn't think what he did or what Asshole did was wrong, which was how long it took for me to get him to realise that he'd better STFU about it or I was going to keep screaming at him.)

It was completely bewildering that my boyfriend seemed totally incapable of understanding why I was angry about what he did.

So anyway, over the new year Asshole finally broke up with Ouch and got together with Biatch Sneaky.

I'll bring you back to Kena Backstab's birthday chalet. Remember that conversation he had with Asshole about a girl he liked in the morning (the one I generously soaked in foreshadowing)? It was about Biatch Sneaky. Apparently Kena Backstab and Biatch Sneaky were almost attached that day, but went through a small rough patch and Asshole stole her. From his bro. On his bro's birthday, no less.

The shit really hit the fan after that.

I've heard Kena Backstab's side of the story - Biatch Sneaky's ex-boyfriend was suicidal and he dared not declare that they were attached before she cleared things up with him, but other than that he was more than happy to do it.

I've also heard some of Asshole's side of the story - Biatch Sneaky was upset that Kena Backstab wasn't paying her enough attention, was playing too much Skyrim etc, didn't want to man up and go steady with her, so she gave up and went off with Asshole.

But these are the facts:

a) Asshole was cheating on his girlfriend.
b) Asshole made a move on Biatch Sneaky when he knew Kena Backstab liked her. What Bro Code?
c) Biatch Sneaky went off happily with Asshole (she didn't even bother to tell him she was leaving Kena B's chalet with Asshole, which I find just rude, and in this case also really sneeeeky) even though she knew she and Kena B were almost attached.

Conclusion: Asshole is terrible. I'm not that sure about Biatch Sneaky, I think I might just dislike her.

In the aftermath, everyone loves debating whether Kena Backstab is in the wrong for mistreating Biatch Sneaky, and how Biatch Sneaky and Asshole are really perfect for each other yada yada.

It's all a distraction - the only thing Asshole said about his cheating is "yeah, that was just really my bad." Ouch has washed her hands of the matter and stayed out of it all, as well.

I think Asshole doesn't deserve to be happy. I've wondered before if everyone deserves to be happy, and this pretty much solves one of my life's questions.

The worst part is that Biatch Sneaky seems to not have a shred of creativity in her body. Let's compare some of her recent FB doodles (I didn't stalk her, I have Asshole added and things like this keep appearing on my news feed) and see how much it resembles that Stop Playing League tumblr I linked earlier:

Posted Jan 27th.
Posted today, 27th Feb.

Okay, ignore the fingery bits, I wasn't actually trying to dig for some cheap topic relevance. My point is, if she's really read Stop Playing League before, my opinion of her has just downgraded to utterly disgusting copycat. (Plus, bitch please, you're sucking on his appendage, stop acting innocent.)

They entered the couple photo competition (Garena's Valentine's Day Carry Me competition) as well, which Stop Playing League advertised for in one of the comics.

And Asshole looks happy, which I am not pleased about, because he's a cheating bastard.

You could probably surmise that I'm just sad someone can be happy without me (since I rejected him before), but I find the thought progression pretty sound independently as well.

It's just one of those horrible revelations, that a guy can live with himself after perpetrating two of the most awful relationship taboos (cheating on his girl + stealing his bro's girl - I am not sure if replacing the + with a TO construes another discrete taboo).

I'm pretty disappointed with life. Not enough to give up and off myself, but enough to kill my drive to fight if given the chance.

death grip

2012-02-26T09:17:00.002+08:00

- is what this tank top has on me. I decided I needed a new white one because the one I had got all loose and huge, so I went to Far East and bought one made of some magical smooth material, and it's so tiny I might actually suffocate because it's squishing my waist.

I hate having elastic thingies between my ribcage and my hips. It actually makes me lose my appetite/energy/mind.

Anyway, I started playing Star Wars: The Old Republic, which entailed actually getting down to watching some of the movies (I'd only watched maybe 15 minutes of a few) because OH MY GOD IT'S STAR WARS didn't hit me hard enough to quell the rage of totally nonsensical maps and clunky controls and space missions that make no sense.

So far the only thing keeping me playing is the knowledge that somewhere somehow I will get a purple lightsaber (supposedly impossible for Republic players) and swing it around in vwoom vwoom glory.

Actually I am seriously considering downloading some sound pack that will make my computer cursor go vwoom vwoom when I move it.

guys are gullible creatures

2012-02-20T06:34:00.005+08:00

The other day I found out several things that deeply disturb me.

Firstly, a girl whom I always thought was genuinely a twit (types things like worhxx and hieeee and ROFLLLLSS!!, calls herself ' xiiao[name] including the apostrophe) is just acting like a retard so she'll be popular among guys.

I am not sure whether to be comforted that nobody is really that idiotic, or horrified because ew.

Secondly, I keep reading articles about 'what guys don't really care about'. It includes things like eyelashes and handbags and shoes.

Guys, stop deluding yourself into thinking you prefer girls without makeup. Most girls who wear makeup do it so you don't really notice it's there (which is the point).

Also, the thing about eyelashes is the most untrue statement ever. Guys say things like 'you have gorgeous eyes', and what they mean (if they don't actually mean boobs) is basically that you have really long eyelashes and look great in them.

Photo stolen via Google. Okay, granted, 'after' photo has better lighting, but it also has more visible eyebags. (Google 'fake eyelashes before and after'.)

Don't shit me. Eyelashes are important.

Also, I accidentally revealed that I am a FB stalker of the highest order when I managed to tell someone, upon meeting her for the first time but stalked on FB, that another person I stalked but met only once before reminded me of newly-met person when she shaved her hair.

That explanation was rather hard to compose.

Finally, dear children: It's GRAPHING calculator, not graphic calculator. I finally cleared this up about 5 minutes ago (I wasn't sure which was right either) when I Googled 'graphic calculator' and it immediately redirected me to 'graphing calculator'. Also, if you Google your calculator model it will describe it as graphing, not graphic.

Which is a lot more sensible, and now I can make fun of people who get it wrong ("Graphic calculator? Does it have a function for describing murder scenes really vividly or something?")

inappropriate

2012-02-16T07:21:00.001+08:00

Why this blog is unprotected despite it having close to a decade of (most really shameful) content:

I am hoping someone will read it and tell me who I am.

Someone told me that girls shape who they will be for the rest of their lives between the ages of 18 and 22. Well, I was going peachy at the start just after hitting 18, but as I got nearer to 19 this bitch be crazy and now that I'm going to be 20 this year I'm starting to despair.

Firstly, it's not my fault my birthday's in November so my age is a little weird, and I only spend 2 months a year telling people I'm the age I actually am.

And it's not that I'm insecure, it's that I've realised that my stupidity indubitably only avoid stopping me when it knows I'm about to do something monumentally dumb.

i.e. the moment I get over my shyness (which is more like half disadain, half confusion), retarded stuff comes out of my mouth.

It's not even that momentary stupidity - what scares me is knowing that when I'm alone my brain will go back to all the moments of idiocy and replay them over and over, and every single time I will want to cry from whythefuckdidIdothat.

I told someone (else) that I still remember awful things I did from a decade ago. He was extremely skeptical - "You were in primary school a decade ago." - but you have no idea the kind of horrible things I remember myself doing.

I heard on the radio that one way to speak up more is by clearing yourself of misconceptions about your own inhibitions, basically, thinking about things that make you reluctant to act, and reasoning logically whether they're really good reasons to be inhibited.

Bitch please, if I didn't already realise that every single stupid thing I've done is absolutely a result of my own nasty personality, I'd either be a saint or a demon by now.

One day I will try and write down every single stupid thing I remember doing, and see if that makes me feel better. (Probably not.)

It doesn't help that I can tell I'm losing my grasp on language. Reading my old posts it seems it was so easy for me to just throw witticisms and literary techniques and happiness into my posts (even most of the miserable ones are pretty enjoyable for me to read), but now (probably because of the people I'm hanging out with and the books I'm not reading) it just Doesn't.

Ugh.

justly reverenced

2012-02-13T11:46:00.001+08:00

Or, why I am scared of people.

In JC1 there was one time in lecture (oh those hours of dicking around) it got into my head to make a pile of star-shaped confetti and leave it on my classmate's lecture notes when she went to the toilet. I'm extremely fond of this classmate, she's adorable.

I made a small heap of green stars with a craft puncher and carefully scooped them up and leaned over (she sat in the row before mine) and loaded them up onto her graphing calculator (which was quite unsmart, considering the stars were so small they might have got stuck between the buttons).

Just as I was settling back to feel pleased with myself, another classmate informs me that I was being mean.

"What? No?" I am slightly bewildered. I probably blinked at her a bit.

"Well what's she gonna do with all that? Why did you dump it on her?"

Which provides a succint summary of why I am extremely unfriendly.

#whattofeedasherlyn 2

2012-02-11T02:28:00.001+08:00

cont'd:

TCC's Classic Marble Cheesecake

spicy seafood udon from Shokudo

rosti from Marche/Shokudo (with sour cream and raw onion rings)

Now Featuring: BREAKFAST 1.0

I don't like eating breakfast. Being half-awake (and usually grouchy) quells hunger. But breakfast is good for the soul and lonely to solo, so here's advice on how to make Sherlyn-approved morning-food.

1. I hate the smell of coffee in the morning, especially instant. No coffee unless it's mixed with Milo, one packet of Milo and one packet of coffee per mug of water. (Plus preferably brewed after I'm already awake, so I can brace myself.)

2. No strange sandwich-type foods with bread and whatnot.

3. Cereal is okay, as long as it's not too sugary (the revamped Honey Stars and Koko Krunch are monstrosities coated in awful layers of plasticky bleaurgh).

4. Acceptable foods include potato wedges (grilled/baked with salt and herbs), Portobello mushrooms (grilled/baked, maybe with cheese), room temperature fruits and berries.

5. Morning is for newspapers and rustly things. If you want to have your legs amputated with the shards of your own skull, turn on anything with loud electronic sounds.

pretty pleased

2012-02-09T04:37:00.001+08:00

I've been playing the maddeningly addictive Pocket Frogs. It's more or less the perfect game to appeal to my suppressed hoarder: rainbow colours, cute small size-spectrum frogs, and a bunch of patterns (more colours). Also, compartments for me to obsess over, and really easy main game (the pond). People who inexplicably wanted to buy a new set of colour pencils every time you saw one with more colours than you had, this game is for you.

material promises

2012-01-31T11:09:00.001+08:00

Just discovered that flipping my phone closed midway through a post clears the whole thing.

I'd forgotten I had this app.

I'm getting increasingly sad that I'm quite a useless person. Not particularly good at studies* nor hobbies nor good looking nor capable of suppressing stupidity.

I think the most likes I ever got on a FB post was the one about being trolled by my dad over yoghurt.

Somehow I suspect this is related to not taking more photos, and doing demoralizing things like gaming instead (I can safely purport that the occurrence rate of matches that will make you feel good about playing is less than one per night, even if you win/annihilate enemy team/play with friends, it's still too good a war metaphor).

School is not bad actually, except I really don't like the tutor in Socio I. Also I keep having brain farts in Logic class (which I'd have the highest participation score in EVER if not for the fact that there's 0% participation grade).

The more appropriate it is for me to do something, the less inclined I am to do it. Like being social during orientation/speaking up in class/not perpetually looking like a hobo etc. And it's been getting worse since I somewhen started putting being comfy before being appropriate (i.e. sitting on the floor to sleep on the MRT, which is also why I try dress like a poly student to school).

Everything's compounded by the daily shoving of better people in my face thanks to my secret mission (see post a few months prior - or don't, it tells you nothing, I did mention it's secret). It's to the point that the only things keeping me going are the MLM-esque morale-raiser lectures every month or so, and the (meagre) practical aspects (which my laziness is rather effectively preventing me from exploiting).

Things that cheer me up on a daily basis: my perpetually hungry fish who will beg for food seconds after giving them a whole cube of worms, missing my acRO OBT characters (damned bloody gigantic katana still makes me snigger), cat videos on youtube, online shopping, looking at pretty graphics.

Graphics. Photos don't have appeal for me any more. Somehow I've been starting to only appreciate event photography/photojournalism. There's only so many times you can gasp at a sunset/here-is-a-macro-of-something-commonplace-that-I-noticed-even-though-it's-so-unassuming, perspacity-of-life/random-"interesting"-stranger/OMGLOMOANDANALOGSOHIPSTA/kid-who-is-the-epitome-of-hope photo (unless it's quirky or has a cute backstory etc).

Okay I shall stop whining now and go back to the lecture :/

*If you had to live with two overachieving siblings and a mother who tells her sisters "the trick to parenting is not to do anything. See, I hardly did anything and those two are doing quite okay," you'd think you're kind of mediocre going downright stupid, too.

antioxidants

2012-01-15T04:18:00.005+08:00

I start to miss blogging whenever I read my own posts, which I guess is a hallmark of satisfactory writing. Most of the time I look over the quirky turns of phrase and wonder how I could ever have been unstupid enough to write something that sane.

Sem 2's starting, I'm taking really terrifying modules. Singapore Lit + Logic + Socio 1 & Methodology + English = help, I'm not even an arts student. I have to go module by module, OCD style, assuring myself that I won't fail and burn:

Singapore Lit's surprisingly awful. Singaporeans apparently enjoy writing prose/poetry about nothing in particular, and since I can't even glean the slightest bit of interesting trivia like I do when I read stuff by non-locals, it's just really irritating. I'm sort of banking on the fact that it's precluded for Lit majors + I actually know people in the class so I won't suddendeath upon hitting a group project.

Logic is logic. It's terrible on less than a full night's sleep, though. I am going to aim for a minor in Philo and will have to overload two modules because of this (spent too much time dicking around taking random modules that looked fun).

Socio's meh. I fluctuate between thinking it's a load of trollop and that they actually make some sense. I had to take two modules at once after suddenly deciding that I want to major in it.

English is bleh. Also I am officially the 3rd person to post on the IVLE forum (quibbling over some definitions in the textbook).

So far, I dislike Caucasian lecturers the most (they've been utterly boring) and like the Japanese ones (they at least have a sense of humor, and the tendency to refer to themselves in third person, which is highly entertaining).

In other news, today I was at KFC and a dude just started talking into his phone really loudly while videoing himself. His monologue went something like:

"Hey so I'm at KFC now. I'm just gonna go to the sink. Oh, it's flooded. As you can see. Yup. Well this is a pretty nice place (wiggles phone around randomly, to apparently show surroundings without his face disappearing)."

Following which I was so stunned I failed to catch what else he said (by this point he moved away from his table to the middle of the restaurant and was talking into the phone while rotating on the spot).

I'd like to flame him for being such an utter attentionwhoring moron, but just in case he was taking a video to show his bedridden, lonely sister or something, I shall refrain. Somewhat.

So anyway, I thought I'd review the modules I took last semester.

EU1101 (Making of Modern Europe): I hate this module. Seriously. Insert long bitchy rant about crazy tutors here. Thank goodness my project group was nice.

Only upside was that that module was in U-town, otherwise I'd never get to take any classes there. It looks awesome but the classes are near impossible to find, especially since my tutorial was in SR9. If you ever have to find SR9, you probably won't. There's signage for SR1-8, and 11-whatever, and you finally manage to stumble across SR10, but SR9 is nowhere near it. People turned up almost an hour late for the first tutorial.

PS1101 (Introduction to Politics): Weirdly similar to SC1101E, content-wise. Lectures were extremely enjoyable. Tutorials were less so, mostly beginning on a curriculum-based note and ending with government bashing (it got to the point that there were audible sneers whenever anyone tried to defend the men in white).

I was considering taking PS as my major but it seems I'm not naturally any good at it (got B+, seems reasonable considering I think I wrote crap for all the essays), I'm now looking at majoring in Sociology.

LAJ1201 (Japanese 1): Lectures were fun but kind of useless, you still have to attend because of the graded quizzes. Tutorials basically one gigantic test period, and insane number of tests per week plus homework etc. High workload compared to most other (arts faculty lol) modules. But it's kind of worth it, you get to meet otakus from other faculties and everyone's very friendly since you see each other up to 7 hours a week.

(Speaking of which, I swear one of my tutorial classmates has a huge crush on the ki siao dresses-like-a-jap-schoolgirl chick. I don't understand why guys with crushes are so easy to read. I was kind of grossed out by this at first, then realised it's probably a good trend that more or less normal guys see crazy otaku girls as potential mate material.)

PH1102E (Introduction to Philosophy): Fun but you feel kind of crazy after a while. Also, the grading system is pretty subjective. Expect mad people to be your tutors. I really didn't like the lecturer, who had really entertaining lectures the first few weeks then sort of gave up. I gave up going for his lectures too, so that's okay.

EN1101E (Introduction to Literary Studies): Lecturers were highly entertaining - Prof A talks insanely fast and I can't look at her talking for too long without feeling like I'm suffocating. Prof P talks really slow in contrast, and they each took half a lecture in the first few weeks, so it needed a bit before everyone adjusted.

The end. My life is boring. I'm considering going clubbing tonight since following this week I'll have tutorials every Thursday morning, but then whenever I get to the club it feels kind of pointless and I start getting hungry. :/

post-production

2011-10-23T21:04:00.002+08:00

I have been walking around deeply unsettled/disquieted/disturbed for the last week or so, shunning company and conversation, trying not to ask about things I know will not be to my liking.

It all boils down to the discovery that grown-ups don't care about imagination.

They don't care about creativity or originality or innovation. They want to follow their business models or common sense, and are proud of their own little projects when money comes in, because the entire enterprise was never about interest or talent or making something new - they applied what works to something else they knew would work, and called that entrepreneurship.

I'm so disappointed it's flooring me mentally. I don't know how to talk to these people without being shockingly critical. I always thought everyone would at least bother to make their project unique or inventive, but no. The only imagination they did was putting together two ideas that already existed, and not bothering to do anything beyond catering to these two separate things, rather than the special amalgamation of both.

In fact, they seem to put in so little effort that things like this happen: I tell them that their publicity media is lackluster and in some places just wrong. It is the only thing I feel like I can fix, but everything is ignored. They spend the entirety of their time using their connections to sell their project, which I feel is simply not worth investing in, because I myself wouldn't bother looking at it - it doesn't have any actual content, entertainment value or use at all.

Another group bothers so little about quality that their 'publicity model' item physically falls apart at at event. It looks good on camera. Nobody cares.

Nobody seems to have a sense of shame or an eye for perfection any more - they have in their heads the 'typical consumer' (whom I believe never existed and is an excuse for sloppiness) and proceed to attempt to cater everything to this half-assed standard. "Don't you think you need higher quality production?" "(patient look) See, the typical consumer won't bother looking at the details, they just see the big flashy whole.."

People are expecting things to earn money based on a well-constructed plan to make money. Whether the actual products make sense doesn't matter, as long as they have friends.

The worst part is that all these happenings are headed by people I actually have pretty good relationships with. I am starting to hate myself because I have to support them - it's impossible to get them to understand or care about what I mean by creativity here, and being apathetic is being a shitty friend when they are spending so much time and emotion on this - and the only way I feel like I can do this is trying to some up with ideas, myself.

So the past few weeks have been spent at war with myself, trying to ignore the fact that I am surrounded (or actually within) various groups that I disagree wholly with, giving them my support while hoping, for the sake of meritocracy, that they won't succeed, and trying to convince myself to numb myself to all this and just learn whatever I can, or lose people I care about.

I am very sick of everything, as is my usual refrain nowadays.

hush-hush

2011-10-15T16:42:00.003+08:00

I went on a secret mission yesterday.

What I didn't expect (since I'm a crabby antisocial bitch-type) is that I actually really like the people I met there so far. My resolve was further reduced to powdery nothingness when a chick with 3 pairs of fake eyelashes and a tattoo walked past and I thought she was headed to the same place as me, but nah she was just a random passerby.

(I realised this sounds like I had an abortion or mammogram or something no I did not sheesh.)

Anyway, secret mission success. Yaaay.

And I'm super happy because one weirdly likeable person I met also mission-succeeded so I get to see her again yaaay.

indecision

2011-09-16T18:25:00.005+08:00

School is weird.

Because everyone keeps asking and I think I haven't mentioned it to them (with the exception of Kenny who just refuses to admit his memory sucks), the modules I'm taking this sem are European Studies I, English Lit I, Philosophy I, Political Science I and Japanese Studies.

So far it's hard to say which module I 'like' the most/least. There's too many things to compare.

EU's kind of fun because it feels a lot like secondary school history (as far as I can remember; which is basically a long period of hazy golden mist with a big A looming out of the darkness in glittery splendour so uhh) but it seems utterly meaningless.

Lit is lit, a familiar derpy place. I'm rather irritated that I fucked up the recent midterm test (we haven't got it back yet but I have a bad feeling) by 1. forgetting to bring my (POETRY ANTHOLOGY i.e. unlike the novels, you have to refer to it because you didn't memorise all hundred over poems in there) text, and 2. overanswering the question ('comment on the structure' apparently means 'tell me what techniques are used in here and nothing else, even if it's a freaking scary university exam and you think they couldn't possibly tell you to identify techniques without analysing their effects because that's secondary school'). Also I gave back all the vocab I need to answer questions properly.

Philosophy just shoved me back into the first few weeks (ok, year and a half) of KI where I fluctuated between thinking my classmates were idiots, being totally lost because I hadn't done the readings and dozing off during classmates' speeches. (In other words I'm still not talking at all and am rather relieved that they only appear to grade you on attending the tutorials, though I wouldn't put it past them to euphemise 'attendance' to 'contribution'.)

And Pol. Science is more or less the most interesting and fresh one (the lecturer's hilarious and my tutorial class is seriously good) but I'm terrified because it's so competitive.

Finally there's Japanese. I usually write LAJ instead, because apparently they're iffy about calling it 'jap' and Japanese sounds like you haven't eaten anything with fiber in it for weeks and are literally full of shit.

It was a terrible choice to do LAJ in my first semester. The workload is, in terms of real school hours, precisely 1.75x a normal level 1k module, and in terms of preparation, about 5x that. There's at least 3 tests per week (vocab quizzes, lecture tests, oral interviews) and the entire tutorial's graded. Every single minute.

At first it was awful because I had no idea what the hell was going on and didn't know which books to study from. Recently it's been picking up slightly.

The tutorials are a source of constant entertainment. I only go to school 3 days a week, and there are 4 different LAJ periods, so I basically have a tutorial with different classmates every school day and a lecture on one of them. The sanity standard of my classmates drops as the week progresses.

Tuesday's the derpy class. I don't have anything to say about it, it's just a class.

I like my Wednesday tutorials the most. The sensei is hyper and adorable and has a sense of humour and my classmates are weirdly cute, the kind of people you'd actually expect to find in LAJ (there's one dude who wore a Vocaloid shirt to class the other day, which is the epitome of normalcy for me).

Friday is where the horror begins.

I swear the way life tries to lull me into defencelessness over the week is intentional, because every Friday I end the week trying not to scream over this one girl who's a weeaboo.

She's worn thigh-high socks and a pleated skirt to every single Friday tutorial so far. Also she tied her hair into twin ponytails the first two weeks, then sort of gave up. Her voice gets 2 octaves higher when she speaks Japanese and my skin crawls when I hear it. She pats whoever's sitting next to her on the back and simpers "it's okayy~" whenever they make a mistake or panic (which, because Japanese is annoying, is quite a lot of the time).

Last week I was on the verge of screaming and bashing a hole in the (plasterboard, anyway) wall with the back of my head whenever she spoke. I seriously considered it, then realised that when I think about it I can't really hear her any more because I'm too distracted by my own thoughts, then everything was alright because it's impossible for her to push me over the edge.

I guess I want to strangle her because I got halfway there but stopped. I wear pleated skirts with hobo long-sleeved shirts with holes in them, not j-high-school-girl-wannabe cardigans. Also, she's in university (I fail to understand how; then again, ditto for me). Why she wants to be in high school again misses me, truly, madly, deeply.

Yes, I am traumatised by this girl.

Other than all this, this semester I'll be trying for USP second intake and other random things undisclosed.

And it's time for bitter addictive coffee at Cat Socrates now.

Okay, make that right after I finish explaining the coffee addiction. One day after PS lecture on Wednesday I had a bout of twitchy hysterics (probably because I hadn't slept, but I decided it was because I hadn't eaten). I wobbled to the nearest eats (random cafe next to LT11) and ordered a cappucino.

It was the horriblest coffee ever.

The next day I woke up absolutely craving that awful cappucino to the point that I tried making instant coffee and picking all the pre-mixed sugar out.

The end.

axiomatic

2011-09-07T18:10:00.004+08:00

Here is the word for what I turn into when I am seriously irritated by a whole cloyingly concerned string of people I didn't want to get involved with:

Snitty.

I constantly have great difficulties ranting, because most of what I rant about seems to self-explanatory to me that I can't even explain why I'm irritated by it. And I have to explain. I think it's some vestigial KI/Lit thing. ("But why doesn't the logic follow?" "TWE is this effect used?" And in chorus: "You can't just quote from the text and leave it at that!")

It goes like this.

Me: ".. and then he called his bros up and told them 'hey guess what I don't want Rundy any more you can go after her if you want.'"

Constant Listener: "And then?"

Me: "Yeah.. Fuck.. I'd not be so unendingly angry if he didn't make out that I'm his whore, that his minions obediently chased me, that.. Wait, you don't think he's wrong at all, do you."

Constant Listener: "Er.."

Me: -brainplodes from lack of explanatory power-

Or like this:

Me: ".. and she claimed to 'know me quite well'. Well, I don't have a fucking clue in hell who she is or that I'd met her, ever, in my life. Actually, I'm pretty sure I've never met her, heard of her, otherwise engaged in social intercourse with her etc. So wtf is going on?"

CL: "And then?"

Me: "I can't stand it when people claim to 'know' me on the basis of having heard my name before."

CL: "Uh huh."

Me: "Wait.. You don't even understand why I think they're a bunch of social sluts, do you?"

CL: "Er.."

Me: -ditto above-

My brand of logic is different from everyone else's, and I don't know why.

2011-08-24T06:39:00.002+08:00

Guys are morons.

I'd rather not get attached if it means you will lose all your friends in the aftermath of damage control and feelings you didn't know about. It feels exactly like the first time you gave in and ripped up a pretty wildflower to discover that there's roots and dirt and all sorts of crap attached.

And, as always, there's that someone you want back whom you cannot have.

and now i'm caught in the middle

2011-08-06T04:23:00.002+08:00

I recently realised how, other than by the rightness of it all, I will be able to tell my future guy is 'the one': one day I will be going through all my photos and realise that he's been photographed by every single one of my cameras.

It's so much easier to take pretty photos when your heart's in it, in more than one way.

In other news, uni life is looking FUCKING TERRIFYING. Matriculation day was just a reminder that I'm a mediocre-looking boring derpy girl:

Me: (gets into cab) Uncle, NUS.

Cab driver: Har? Where?

Me: .. NUS? National University of Singapore?

CD: Woodlands there ah?

Me: No, er, Buona Vista?

CD: Okay.. Go by which way?

Me: (brain melts down)

To me NUS is like a humongous landmark. If you told me to name 10 places in Singapore every cab driver should know how to get to, NUS would be one of them.

i.e. I do not know how to direct anyone there.

I finally managed to derp my way to NUS somehow and then realised I had no bloody idea how to get to the registration hall (my dad has ALWAYS sent me wherever I need to go in NUS, having carted two kids back and forth for about 6 years already).

Sadly I didn't manage to get utterly lost and miss the matric fair altogether, because Christy walked past me. I suspect if it'd been anyone else in the entire faculty I wouldn't have dared to ask them for directions.

I also got suckered into registering for choir again. I don't know if I'm extremely masochistic or what dear god.

I've been playing League of Legends. I feel slightly more accomplished having graduated from girly little MMOs. Then again, I am very stressed out because I absolutely suck at LoL.

Loads of stuff, no mood to talk about it though mostly it was fun. >_>

don't wanna let you go

2011-07-04T16:28:00.000+08:00

"Well every princess has her knight
And I'm still in it for the fight"

Click Five - Catch Your Wave: literal interpretation = RO.

Tags: The Click Five, Music, More Music Videos

why are we so pro

2011-07-02T11:59:00.005+08:00

Read this post first.

Me: Eh so what house were you in?

Sis: Uh.. the green one.

Me: Huh is that R house or something.

Sis: No.. think it was T.

Me: Oh kay I'm in A house.

Sis: OHHHH IT SPELLS ARTS! OHHHHH I WAS WONDERING WHY IT'S SO RANDOM!

Me: ...

Sis: YOU SOLVED THE MYSTERY!

Also, reminded that everything is relative. When you survive the horrors of being thrown into a room with about 30 random people and forced to socialize, hanging around your friends you haven't met in years is chickenshit.

2011-07-02T01:08:00.002+08:00

Oh hello there. I am back in that familiar rut where I'm just the right combination of tired/wistful/introspective where I start typing and don't know what I want to say. It's a nostalgic place to be.

When Singapore Post Center just opened in 1998, they gave out stationery sets with an olden-day theme (oddly, 'olden days' seems to mean something different in Singapore than in other countries) and I gave my parents a hard time making them explain what 'nostalgia' meant (I was 6 then, abstract concepts were not my forte).

I'm terrified that the moment they leave, I won't have any more moments of nostalgia. Everything will be shrouded with loss and grief, because that's how I flow. And the way things are looking, I need to start preparing.

Actually no, I do a lot better when I just wing it.

now it's too late to turn it around

2011-06-29T13:29:00.004+08:00

Gar gar backlog like nobody's business.

I went for Arts Camp. It was extremely tiring and I have bloody weird tan lines now. I have random stripes on my shoulder where I forgot to put sunblock. Also I met a lot of people who all now think I'm a secret clubber.

I'M NOT. On thursday I went to a club. It's been agreed that we didn't go clubbing, because when we got there we discovered it was an underage party and nobody knew how to dance or have fun and they were all drinking coke while we got high on Martell.

DISCLAIMER: OMG I DON'T EVEN GO CLUBBING THAT OFTEN IT WAS JUST BECAUSE WE HAD 2 HALF-FINISHED BOTTLES THERE and actually I don't even know what I was doing there other than being drunk.

I can't even remember half of Arts Camp because I spent it in a sleep-deprived stupor.

Oh yes. Benita was in my OG, which culminated in both of us coincidentally writing entire page-long odes to each other on the last day's autograph booklet things. We hit upon the genius policy for Fright Night which is: If you scream nonstop it's not scary any more because you're already screaming. I'm serious, it works.

I am also rather traumaed by FASS guys (or on second thought people in general). It appears that none of them are even remotely the kind of guys I hang out with. Even in MJC the sporty insane (read: ODAC/wushu) dudes in my class were still extremely geeky. I had zero idea how to communicate with them because they were basically jocks. omgwtfbbq

Example SP activities. SP = Secret Pal = basically speed dating. They made me talk to 5 guys blindfolded.

Guy #1: Shooting.
Guy #2: Canoeing.
Guy #3: Basketball.
Guy #4: Basketball-but-wants-to-be-in-canoeing.
Guy #5: Shooting.

I was seriously wondering if some of them were actually counsellors and kidding with me, but apparently not. WTF IS THIS? It was a toss-up between Guy #5 (because he's from MJC) and Guy #1. In the end Guy #1 and I chose each other because we both take KI and it's a solidarity/superiority thing, I guess.

Oh my god and then it just went horrific from there because I realised Guy #1 was basically Chunyong replacing mathsgeek with ridiculously happening photography things.

It made me feel sliiightly better that even credentially cool people (CY: SC president, guitar, over 9000 As, pilot, extremely cute family) can sink to the level of going Y U NO FINISH PORTAL 2 at me every week or so even though I accidentally dao him most of the time.

But no it was still harrowing. HELLO JC SYSTEM! Y U lead me to believe guys are all geeky flaccid derps and prepare me for life around them AND THEN throw me into the midst of all these cool lifeful people? HELLO NUS! Y U no put me in Computing where all my soul brothers are?!

So I was 'socially exhausted' (-Benita) by the last day and just went home and crashed. After that was Cosfest. Like the next day.

Yes, yesterday when I got home after weeks of not being home at sane hours, my sister went "Whoa is that really you? I haven't seen you in AGES." Followed by my brother, who was actually to blame because he was in his room the whole time and it wasn't my fault he didn't want to come out. NPI.

For the first time in my life I stayed over in the chalet which was rather awesome, other than the part where I dropped a beer in the doorway trying to get at my Soya Bean Milk* (I am clearly such a good girl!) and it stayed there smelling like puke for the next 2 days.

I was Mahou Pink of Mahou Sentai Magicka Rangers for day one. Highly resent being pink by the way, I was supposed to be green but was too lazy to finish my shit by CF so one of the other dudes lent me his robes. It was utter bull because I tried to rush a staff overnight and was too damn lazy to finish it.

Also I (not really, I lost track of my camera for a really long time there and it came back with the film all gone, so the last 5-10 shots are by other people) finished my 2nd roll of redscale film, so you're about to get a lot of crazy photos.

Must point out though: it's best feeling ever to do a cosplay where your face can't be seen. Though I still have the reflex see-camera-must-derpface. SO RELAXING plus you can chat while the cameras are going off.

Day 2 was my troll BRS. Basically I've never wanted to cosplay BRS for anything other than photoshoots because I sincerely do not want to walk around in a bikini top. So after 30 seconds of jumping around the room in the proper attire, I chickened out and put a shirt on and just went out in my jacket.

The main reason I went home to get my BRS stuff was to get my (male) friend my High Priestess dress. But I couldn't find it. I truly madly deeply have no fucking idea where the damn thing went. The state of my room was sorely unlivable after I ransacked it but I still don't know whether I lent it to someone or sold it or it just got eaten by my cupboard. It's befuddling.

I had a total mental breakdown on Sunday night and was saved by Reifes McFail.

Apparently, in the meantime, this happened:

Screw this, it's getting harder and harder to blog without mentioning people, but everyone is so sensitive nowadays I can't say anything without worrying about getting passive aggroed a bit later. D: I AM SURE MCFAIL IS OKAY THOUGH CAUSE HE IS AWESOME

It's creepy, the contrast between Craig David's singing/speaking accents.

Howait. I must say, the past few weeks have been fraught with drama even though I thought I'd brainwashed myself into being a chillax dao blob of putty. Things are looking up though.

And this weekend looks like another insane chiongster one, what with the OG outing and A.GEP.Dinner and loads of strange things like my cousin (who is the same age as me) getting married.

FUNFUNFUNFUN LOOKING FORWARD TO THE WEEKEND. Uh not really I'm so sleep deprived I might just flop over and die soon.

*Soya Bean Milk. I'm spamming it nonstop nowadays because of my cosplay plans:

STGCC (Aug): Annie - LoL
AFA (Nov): Blue Rose - Tiger and Bunny (!!! HELP ME)
Misc. events (is EOY still around?): Horo - Spice and Wolf

I might also skip O Week because I need a) boobs and b) to stay out of the sun. >_>

MY LOVE MAY BE COLD BUT IT'S PUT YOUR CRIME ON HOLD okay shut me up now.

boys and their exes

2011-06-16T22:58:00.004+08:00

It's kind of funny how boys will be totally befuddled and hurt when their girlfriends want to break up with them. Really, if you'd been a good boyfriend she'd be happy, and if she were happy she wouldn't want to break up with you.

Two years in a relationship? Four? Why should she keep torturing herself just because she's been torturing herself for a long time? Even if you used to be happy, if she isn't happy now, there has clearly been a downward trend and it's time to break up.

Girls are actually pretty scientific in that respect.

Much less do you have any right to be angry at her, because if you seriously think you were the best boyfriend in the world and she had no reason to dump you, then you were obviously doing something wrong.

No girl will fit into your 'proven formula' of boyfriendliness. (And if you have one you're a douche.)

Sherlyn's Guide To Not Being A Horrible Boyfriend

1: If you want to keep a girl the first thing you need to learn is adaptability, because we can change in an instant.

Maybe your ex wanted space and thought you were too clingy. That doesn't mean your current girl needs the same at all.

Maybe your girl wanted loads of attention at the beginning, but now she needs some time alone.

If you can't even tell when your possible life partner is becoming different, you deserve to be dumped.

2: Stop whining.

Telling her about your problems is one thing, going over and over and over them because you obviously have no ability to resolve issues in your life and are the king of repetition is extremely annoying.

Much less keening on and on about how your ex dumped you and you are all sad. Seriously, shut up. We either don't care or it's hurting our feelings.

And also there is the urge with really sadistic bitches (me) that we will feel like dumping you in exactly the same way just to appreciate the irony.

The best attitude to have is pretending (ATTITUDE, I'm not saying actually lie to her) that you had no past relationships and are just naturally trying your best to be a good boyfriend.

3. Always assume you are not the best.

Girls can go from sublimely happy to depressed bitchy balls of angst overnight (usually every month or so).

If she isn't happy, make her happy. If she's happy, figure out how to keep it that way. It's a work in progress.

... (And now I'm too distracted with reading the rather fascinating wiki article on the sublime to continue this post. Uhhh might get back to it later.)

and two seconds later

2011-06-16T15:46:00.008+08:00

Me: Oh wow, I actually bought the exact correct amount of gems for my entire skirt! :D :D *proud of self*

Me: Oh fuck I forgot about the jacket.

...

Me: Oh wow my dress actually fits!

Me: WAIT THAT MEANS I GOT FAT

In other news, I have no idea whether I should chiong Spice and Wolf for Cosfest day 2 or just chillax with my High Priestess stuff.

(Will update this post with photos of stupid TB dress once I find my stupid glue gun to bling the whole thing up.)

Also, I am Princess of Repeated Injury.

(2 weeks ago:)

Me: OH SHIT I'M LATE AAARGH /falls into depressed plant area outside Haato and scrapes foot horribly.

(last week:)

Me: OH SHIT MY STOMACH HURTS AAARGH /falls down stairs below my block and slices foot open in exactly the same place*.

- The irony is that this never happens when I'm wearing heels, only when I'm in perfectly flat slippers. :l

...

(last month:)

Me: Oh yay attack of the zombie hands again (my hands randomly start getting horrible blistery infections when I am stressed out)! /I have no more fingerprints for a few weeks.

(yesterday:)

Me: There is nothing better to do I shall help this guy's house I am crashing twirl his metal cord around a stick so he can make his chainmail! /hands develop horrible blisters.

(today:)

Me: There is nothing better to do I shall zhng my entire dress with bling red gemstones instead of beads! /hotglues hands together, blistered blisters are blistering.

Yes this whole post is full of quotes by me because I'm so traumatised by other people right now that I don't really want to quote anyone else.

Last night I ended up going to a Thai disco to drink. I never want to do that again ever in my entire life. It is mindblowing trying to socialise with your male friends when they have hostesses feeding them drinks and/or sitting on their laps and/or randomly kissing them.

SERIOUSLY I CAN'T LOOK THEM IN THE EYE ANY MORE OMG WHAT WAS THAT?

This is another incident I am probably going to shove under a large rock in my memory and hope it never comes to mind again.

(R/S status update: the question is whether I'd rather have nobody or you, and really it's looking rather bleak.)

*Not to mention I think I have a major blood clotting problem because instead of drying up or flowing around, the pool of blood on my foot (I was trying not to let it drip on the floor) turned into this semi-solid red jelly within minutes and sat there on my bathroom floor refusing to be washed off.

FUN FUN FUN FUN

2011-06-06T23:24:00.003+08:00

OH GOD THIS IS DAMN HILARIOUS.

I realised that in 2005 I did a Rebecca Black.

"today i is thurday! tomorrow is friday! and after friday is the weekend~! whoo!" (sic)

Um in my defence I was 11 then. ;_;

#whattofeedasherlyn 1

2011-06-05T01:14:00.004+08:00

A non-exhaustive list of food your Sherlyn will appreciate.

korean seaweed (not tao kae noi though I don't particularly hate it)

roasted baby sardines

maraschino cherries

tako sashimi (or good salmon)

bonito flakes

frozen wakame*

ribeye steak

myojo chicken abalone noodles with one egg

that expensive fishcake from sakuraya

caramel frappe with coffee jelly, 2002 ed., and whipped cream

haagen dazs melon ice cream

poached eggs with seasoning

favourite types of pasta: farfalle, tortelloni

*actually, not really. I'm addicted to this ulu cheena brand of seaweed that comes in frozen packets and you have to soak it to get the salt off and everything. I have no idea where they sell it now, I used to get it from Chinatown and they sold it in supermarkets for a while I think.

i'd rather rage than sit around and wait all day

2011-05-31T17:12:00.003+08:00

I am slightly creeped out by the fact that there is nobody but me writing in this blog. It's weird, because even when I talk to myself it's never a monologue, it's me imagining other people's responses and self-entertaining.

Anyhoo I have a new word.

Fuckever

1. What the fuck ever. To not care about, not care for, shrug someone off and ignore.
2. Fuck everything.

I didn't originally know the definition for this. I happened to come up with it and it makes so much sense that it means what it does that my meaning coincided perfectly with the standard one.

So it's like: Dude you're being a retard and if I tell you you're being a retard and you disown me because I'm critical about everything. I'm sorry, your definition of 'friend' is more like my definition of 'mindless follower'.

If you were actually the slightest bit awesome I wouldn't be so derisive all the time.

Damn I feel like I wasted a lot of my awesomeness on you, considering you're stealing everyone's all over the place and pretending it's yours. FUCKEVER, MAN.

I accepted the offer from NUS FASS.

Weird things have been happening because I get to breathe now.

Me: Hi dear, english language/lit/philo/SEA studies/SA studies/jap studies/CNM/political science/socio?? .../wrist..

Wifey: What's CNM? Chinese new media? What's SA? South African studies?

And heh realised I wanted to do the same screenshot thing that SH did on her blog but decided I know too many people who didn't get into uni and will probably be depressed reading it.

I am sad because after going on an insane shopping spree on Gmarket and compiling the optimum selection of post-its and stickers and shit to buy, FASS took so long to send me the letter that by the time I got it my cart got cleared.

So. I'm actually the most terrified of FASS out of all my options, because it's taking a huge leap in a weird direction. I've always been clinging desperately to science even though everyone has always been all SHERLYN YOU SUCK PLEASE GO TAKE MORE HUMANITIES (including, evidently, my results).

Also arts people scare me. A lot.

But I am sick of being bored out of my mind by science, even if I feel happy doing it because it seems less full of bullshit.

Rather insane goals for uni include getting on the Dean's List for at least 3 semesters, going on exchange to Waseda (if I can get into USP) or North CA, and being all awesome.

Right now I am trying to decide my major. I had to do it by elimination.

Will get pwned by people with background in these fields:
Chinese Language (you're kidding right)
Chinese Studies
Theatre Studies
Economics
Geography

Have minimal interest in these fields: (this list will probably upend everything you ever thought you knew about me)
English Language (would rather seppuku than go through 4 years of grammar nazi training and then be labelled a grammarbitch)
English Literature (would rather seppuku than have to not laugh at my own bullshitting)
History (sadly I just like this because it was a free A1 in O levels)
Psychology (really it's below Lit in my scale of unbullshit subjects)
Social Work (sorry I'm not noble enough)
South Asian Studies
Southeast Asian Studies
Malay Studies (not very enthu about South Asian countries, really)
Japanese Studies (I don't want to base my entire life on being an otaku D: Also was very traumatised by the sumo segment of Freakonomics so I don't think I'm cut out for this)

Don't really mind doing one of these:
Asian Studies
European Studies
Communications & New Media
Sociology
Philosophy
Political Science

Will have to take one of these if I want to apply for exchange to North CA:
Philosophy
Political Science

Actually, I don't really want to take any course there is the slightest chance of having to do a project on cosplay in. I get extremely defensive over it for no particular reason. Fuck off and stop trying to psychoanalyse/classify/explain my hobbies.

I am one of those people who is automatically defensive when asked to do surveys on cosplay, mainly because the people who wrote the questions have no tact at all. A typical cosplay survey goes like this:

Why do you cosplay?

a) I like the attention
b) I like pretending to be someone else
c) I like making unique outfits nobody else will own
d) I like dressing up / crossdressing
e) I like Japanese culture
f) My friends like it
g) My parents hate it

- which just annoys me. Even if the answer is probably all of the above for most cosplayers, you guys are just being extremely callous. The equivalent in terms of music would probably be:

Why do you play the piano?

a) I like the attention
b) I like feeling superior to people who don't
c) It's good exercise
d) I like being able to control and make music without having to listen to the radio or download songs
e) I like music
f) My friends all know how to
g) My parents forced me to

I don't know. I could probably come up with even more insulting responses to Why are you a Christian? but I will then get lynched and so shall refrain for now.

tldr; I am probably going for European Studies (but need to study a language for this, ew) or Philo (will go insane) or PolSci (most likely choice).

Don't even ask me what minor I'm doing because I have no idea whatsoever.

flowers that look like vulvas: genus Clitoria

2011-05-31T01:36:00.003+08:00

Melbourne was nothing like.

I was expecting this:

I am very thankful that I did not have to see a single live kangaroo/koala/wallaby/whatever in my entire trip.

This is because of my wonderful tripmate Eng Hong who decided very cannily that she did not want to go visit farms/aquariums/wildlife reserves/anywhere boring and typically Australia.

(And also to whom the title is dedicated because she drove me nuts getting high over any romance/sex scenes on TV and proceeded to vibrate in excitement on my bed.)

Yes I realise this post is about 2 weeks late. Oops.

We therefore ran around the city area shopping/eating for one week. Actually, we were supposed to visit Luna Park/the observatory at the Botanic Gardens but both were closed for strange reasons so we wandered around instead at the beach/gardens respectively.

(Side note: I was trying to set the captions so you can see the camera/film when you mouseover, then decided nobody cares and I'm too lazy anyway.)

I managed to semi-restrain myself and brought only 5 cameras - my D90, F55, FE, Canon S90 and the Instax Mini.

To my utter shock, the camera I used the least was the D90. I didn't even take it out of the camera condom the entire trip. It's just too heavy and annoying to carry everywhere. I'm seriously considering using my last paycheck to upgrade it to a D7000.

I used the F55 a lot, and the FE, and ended up with about 4 rolls of film (2.5 from the FE, 0.5 from the F55) but have only developed 3 because I haven't been able to finish the last roll from the FE.

Actually, I think if I'd brought the D90 out to shoot along with the film cameras I'd have a lot more interesting photos, but also hell to pay for in my shoulder muscles. My right shoulder is just about wearing down to a horrible quivering achy mess right now.

The S90 was mainly to camwhore with. Yep.

@

Notes on Melbourne:

1. Melbournians have good hair. Every few streets or so you see someone with an awesome mohawk (not the crappy spiked-up-in-a-row types you get in Singapore) and someone with pink/orange/purple hair.

Sadly I didn't have the sense to chase after them and get photos because bleh coloured hair I see it every few weeks at whatever cosplay event I go to. I had no sense of urgency. Oops.

2. Melbournians have good music. This is my personal opinion which I suspect a lot of people disagree with.

3. Melbournians have good TV. Since shops close at 5.30 and there's basically nothing to do after that, we spent a lot of time bumming around in the hotel room watching good TV and bickering over the heater - I didn't bring a single pair of non-long pants and EH was freezing to death all the time.

I formulated the Technique Of Two Layers. (Of pants.) Basically, as long as you wear two layers of full-length pants, you will never feel cold. I tested this when we shimmied over to the sushi shop which closes at 11pm in slippers, proceeding to not feel cold at all.

I am not sure if this works with thin tops since I didn't have any to test it out.

4. Melbournians are extremely sweet and happy about everything. They don't say 'hi', they say 'how are you?'. When I went shopping and gave a bookstore cashier exact change, she went 'oh, perfect' at me. I am still slightly overwhelmed by their friendliness.

When we got there on the first day we were more or less braindead from the plane ride and all. Thankfully Akai got us from the airport to our hotel somehow. Also it was bloody cold because I hadn't discovered the Technique Of Two Layers yet. We sort of penguin-shuffled along the streets searching for food.

While we were there, there was some protest being staged at Federation Square. I am still not sure what exactly they were protesting but it was quite exciting and attended by random punks.

I wanted to go up to the one with the mohawk and scream because he was wearing a Talking Heads jacket but I couldn't remember the lyrics of any of their songs, I'm always too mesmerised by how pretty David Byrne looks in all the videos. D:

Also, Vesak Day passed. I was rather surprised to find that they actually (sort of) celebrate Vesak Day in Melbourne. They set up an altar and everything in Fed Sq. and had these cute Bodhi leaves on stalks for people to write wishes on.

Sunday was spent bumming around and going for the chocolate tour, which was awesomesauce. Also EH got very high on chocolate. I do not understand how this happens.

Basically the only things I bought from Melbourne were books, sweets, chocolate and alcohol.

The drinks were because a lot of people are going through insane and wanted some. I got 2x Cafe Boheme (it is so good) which came with a bottle of free Passionfruit Cocktail rubbishy thing, 1x Martell and 1x Bailey's (for Tenma).

Also I am extremely sad because I was going to get 2x Bailey's so I could get a free glass. The glass was so cute it's a cone-shaped thing which nests in a blobshaped holder! But they didn't seem to have that offer by the time I was on the way back. Sadface.

Each bottle was about 1.5kg (1 litre of drink plus heavy bottle) and I nearly died carrying them back.

We ate some good food and some sohungryIdon'tcare food. Melbourne is weird about jap, they keep serving sushi in giant long rolls with these little fish-shaped bottles of soya sauce.

It is the nastiest soya sauce I have ever tasted. If anyone asked me to guess what kind of soya sauce I suspect the Starbucks at Simei puts in their Caramel Frappes, it would be this annoying fish thing.

(Yes, I have a Simei-Starbucks-soya-sauce conspiracy theory. On Sunday I forgot about this - Melbourne has good coffee - and asked Tenma to treat me to an extra coffee frappe and proceeded to be reminded of the horror.)

Most atas food we had was at the airport at Cafe Vue. I love their decor. Wanted to take a photo of the mirror wall and everything but a bunch of people came in and got the long table so I couldn't camwhore over it.

Melbourne is also more animal-populated. There are random horse-drawn carriages everywhere, because of the novelty of some lame law that only horse-drawn carriages are allowed in Federation Square, and no cars. (This is a lie, I doubt the horses could fit into the Square anyway.)

Also sparrows. The entire city is overrun by seagulls and sparrows and pigeons and the occasional myna. I wasted quite a bit of film trying to take photos of the sparrows having a rave in Starbucks (and failed).

One thing I am totally annoyed about is how boring their Botanical Gardens are. It's basically a largeish plot of grass with some random trees and shit on it. Hello, look at Singapore's Garden, it's a giant playground with hills and spice gardens and pretty water features and people picnicking all over.

Their grass is prettier though. It's green. And nice to sit on. And less ants.

Okay I am seriously lazy to think of captions for everything. Will post the digital photos up next!

When I was young I was a fool, so wrap me up in dreams and death

2011-05-30T02:38:00.005+08:00

People have been telling me things which are basically boiling down to this poem:

A Slice of Wedding Cake

Why have such scores of lovely, gifted girls
Married impossible men?
Simple self-sacrifice may be ruled out,
And missionary endeavour, nine times out of ten.

Repeat 'impossible men': not merely rustic,
Foul-tempered or depraved
(Dramatic foils chosen to show the world
How well women behave, and always have behaved).

Impossible men: idle, illiterate,
Self-pitying, dirty, sly,
For whose appearance even in City parks
Excuses must be made to casual passers-by.

Has God's supply of tolerable husbands
Fallen, in fact, so low?
Or do I always over-value woman
At the expense of man?
Do I?
It might be so.

Robert Graves

I can't really think of a response to this that's not a song by Avril Lavigne, which slightly grosses me out.

(I am damn jealous of her boobs in the MV for this song by the way.)

(Also it's very very disturbing hearing this song from guys. So not cute.)

It's not the impossibleness that disturbs me, it's that I don't feel like he's trying at all. At all at all at all.

After the first week or so of strange fragile happiness, it seems like all the introspection and meta-relationshipping we've been doing has everything screwed up.

The issue here is that when I ask him if he thinks he can handle fighting against my slight overambitious uni schedule to see me, he says he doesn't know.

When he asks me if I'd wait for him, my answer is yes. Fullstop. Simply because I have been through the incredible mindfuckage which is his uncertainty, and I highly doubt he'll be similarly traumatised if the same happens to him.

The thing about metarelationshippage is that once you start using your head instead of your heart, you just can't extricate yourself from the infinite regression spiral.

In metaepistemology, you just dust yourself off and agree that you found out some useful stuff and this was a jolly good exercise, and go home sniggering to yourself feeling superior because other people take knowledge for granted.

When you start examining the foundations of your relationship, though, it fucks everything up, because you realise there are huge unresolvable gaps all over the damn place and there's practically an arms race going on while your arguments and peeves glare at each other over the crevasses.

And then there is that giant issue of it doesn't even look like he gives a shit so what am I doing here. No you're not allowed to feel jealous when I hang around with my female friends. No you're not allowed to feel hurt when I am disproportionately intimate with a girl I used to like.

Fine, I'll just sit there and drink myself into a tired sleepy stupor then.

the smell of you in every single dream i dream

2011-05-11T16:48:00.004+08:00

Okay, too many things are happening I don't know what to blog about anymore.

BUT IT DOESN'T MATTER because on Friday I'm going to Australia and my entire blog will proceed to be filled with Australiaspam and nobody will care about the lack of information on the past few weeks!

I do think my English is going down the drain though. Hanging around Sgcafers kind of induces a Singlishspeak trance I am unable to extricate myself from.

Things I am trying to escape from by running off on holiday:

Guys. I don't know if there is something wrong with my pheromones or what but suddenly there is this influx of guys and I have no idea what to do about them. Oh lordy.

The fact that I have still not finished Portal 2 (so slap me).

The heat - it's ridiculous. Thank goodness I work in an air-conditioned room or I'd be roasting to death at home by now.

The lack of letters from NUS. Hello please send me something soon.

Anyhow, went for the NTU interview, it was quite okay*. I realised that I can get through most horrible stressful panic-entailing situations (A levels, awkward bus rides, everything dying all over the place in droves) by convincing myself that they will be over soon.

Also somehow we started discussing Aljunied GRC. (I'm in a WP ward now! Exciting! Every day I head for work, I check if the dustbins around my estate are still there or the town council has confiscated them already.)

In a monologue, I wrote this and people are highly entranced and RTed it:

"Maybe you just like broken guys. You piece them together, make them the happiest they've ever been, then get bored and smash them to bits."

Re: last year, I think I got overconfident and decided I could smash guys with my bare hands, and got cut up very badly in the process.

(Actually, come to think of it, I have smashed up perfectly sound guys before to fubarness, so maybe I just have a different sense of aesthetics.)

Will use a hammer or gravity next time then.

Okay who am I kidding. Emo rant time.

I catch myself wanting to scream and ask why this is happening again, but my head reminds me: this is what you wanted.

You were the one who set your heart on throwing yourself into everything, you were the one who wanted never to worry about being hurt, and to chase people as hard as you felt like without thinking about reputation/time/reason every damn time you fell for someone.

So, okay, fine, I don't have the right to bitch about it, this is what I asked for - change, abandon, happiness - and I am facing the consequences now.

This leaves me in quite the bind, because everyone is firmly convinced that I only fall for assholes and I am not allowed to be jaded or hardened because of it.

I do think I really need to get some books, though, I haven't read anything in months and my brain is just rotting away for the lose.

*If you call being lost on their campus for 45 minutes and having to reschedule 'okay'.

i've seen you driving in your automobile with the woman that i'm in love with, and i think: you should go procreate with yourself

2011-04-26T19:04:00.012+08:00

For the past few days my floor's been leaking water from somewhere. At first it got on the pile of clothes, then it leaked into my film. By the time I realised it'd got to my pile of books, some stuff was gone.

Namely, this one yellow B5 notebook I rant in. It turned into a sodden pile of film-smelling mush with a few blotches where all the ink used to be.

I'm like, meh, that's that, guess I don't have to read those again and remember what a pathetic moron I used to be.

Also, this forced me to pack my room, so I had more space to put my stockings. HEH HEH HEH.

I bought 20 pairs of stockings online (they cost me about 35 bucks total including shipping). I feel totally insane. Also, they totally cheated me - I wanted to get a pair of chartreuse/pale green stockings just because Fllay Allster has this pair of colour unmatchable ones with her Earth Alliance uniform.

(I am not very sure why I keep wanting to type EA as UMNO.)

Sadly they were out of stock or something. No pun intended. The quality of the stockings is pretty good (better than the Daiso ones). I'm trying to sell off some, so if anyone needs weirdly coloured stockings, drop me a line.

I also picked up my 4 pairs of very expensive tattoo stockings from Akai (75-ish bucks total). They're more durable than I expected, which also means more opqaue.

I wore the peacock print one out clubbing to BF with Tenma&Co. on saturday. I also actually blacked out for a bit from the alcohol/trance music, got called a sexy nerd by a random angmoh - LAST TIME I AM WEARING GLASSES THERE - and a particularly effeminate gay dude said he liked my dress, which is a pretty high compliment in my book.

(Yes the totally skanky looking ponytail is my back.)

Miserably enough, I thought they made my legs look a weird colour, but people (Jason - I went to pass him his crazyexpensive shoes - and some random security guard in Serangoon) thought the print was an actual tattoo, so apparently not?

I am quite sure people are not going to read the words in this post any more. I really like stockings. Sorry.

I still haven't finished Portal 2. I'm officially a geekdom failure. I preordered it and started playing once I got home on release day, but the whole FPS motion sickness thing coupled with apparently stupidity that is preventing me from solving the damn puzzles is driving me mad.

Meanwhile, I've been trying to do another senbazuru (for fun). I stopped for a bit to do a Companion Cube origami, because I made something random for Daniel which looked like a Companion Cube and got me started on the whole Portal thing.

I'm pretty sure scanning the instructions is violating some copyright, so all I can tell you is just buy the damn book - Polyhedron Origami For Beginners. The photos and diagrams are in such pretty gradient-ey bright colours that I got it a few years ago from Borders on a whim.

To elaborate, at the time I was vehemently not buying books and instead doing illegal things like hiding in corners of the store taking photos of the pages and reading them from my computer. This continued as long as the book was less than 80% useful, and didn't make me happy.

(In case anyone was wondering, the photos above were shot at Eastpoint Starbucks where Tenma and I were camping for coffee intoxication.)

I bought the book. Nuff said.

I can't remember what diagram I used for the heart in Daniel's cube. Just google heart origami or something.

Your finished cube will be around the same height as each sheet of paper you're using for one module.

Also, in the past few days I got married. I have totally lost track of the number of times I've gotten married but can safely say that I have at least 6 husbands (that I can name, at least) and 4.5 wifeys so I suppose it's all good.

(We are bumming around in town. I'm moaning about how my linker can't use any of the good equips.)

Xeths: Hey, Rainz (the GM). Marry us plz! x3

BGM: dm dm DM DMMMM DMM DMDM DM.. (the RO marriage music is about 43 times louder than anything else ingame and will explode your speakers.)

Me: LOL WHAT? MY EARS THEY ARE DYING

Random dude in town: What was that for. Shit it's so loud you woke them up. (No, we didn't manage to find out what 'them' was.)

GM: @nuke (randomdude)

Disguise NPC: The disguise event will be starting in 3 minutes.

Random dude: Who wants to join your events anyway.

GM: (revives and nukes randomdude about 40 times in a row)

These few weeks have been slightly insane and also I am going broke very fast and do not intend to go drinking/clubbing for at least a few months because it is horrible on the wallet and also very tiring. Okay, unless I am just bumming off Eng Hong's genius bottle of Bailey's at her place.

(That is what I said a few weeks ago. Total lie. Do not trust me. The moment someone asks I'll go anyway.)

I've been going out so much I can't even blog about it any more because everything is just madly accumulating. I WENT TO SHOOT KITES WITH MIYO AND SH. It was pretty fail because it wasn't actually a kite day.

We ended up camwhoring. As in three girls with DSLRs camwhoring.

Re: the Butter Fac-ing, I don't know how they can be this awesome but I ended up hanging out with a tux made out of electrical tape, a sandbag man and a giant armored spiky blob.

Sadly even though the S90 is awesome it's near-impossible to take photos in a horribly dark club, so everything is blur and weird and I'm too mindfucked by the events to blog much about it.

I'm also addicted to this video. I already posted it on my twitter and fb but here I am still listening to it so I shall post it here too.

It's election period now. Pretty exciting. I think the arguments against any of the parties are great but the arguments for all are terrible. I have new love for twitter now, because it's feeding me exactly the right amounts of electionspam.

Things I desperately need to do this month include fix up my Trinity Blood dress, do the Magicka robes, somehow hack my way through the BRS props and finish the bloody Theory Of Music papers. Also write a lot of stuff, do my senbazuru and whatever else.

Also, got called for NTU Socio interview (finally dear god) tomo.

So I'll shuffle up to the interviewer, put my arm around her waist and go "HEY BABE. SHERLYN SUAVE KOH HERE. WHUTUP?"

Hi welcome me to NTU Socio now.

Finally:

MJCHOIR. GOOD LUCK FOR YOUR SYF KIDS. <3

I got extremely excited watching old choir videos and ended up dancing around the shop singing the other day.

This was a rubbish post like you will not believe. I am deeply sorry.

my love dwelt in a northern land (woodlands)

2011-04-18T14:52:00.002+08:00

Wednesday:

Today is Kim's birthday. And also a rather sad day at work because I suddenly have a lot of things to do and the people who are testing guitars today kind of suck.

I bought a new handsaw (in my defence, I am having a bad day and a bout of throat infection+food poisioning+fever). It's a 3-way alloy handsaw with adjustable high carbon steel blade. I sound like Winry Rockbell.

One thing I realised is that my sharp objects are not very good against any potential ax murderers that might break into my house. They are only good for slicing up the cadaver of the ax murderer after.

Also, I realised that my handsaw doesn't have a blade guard, which makes my teeth twinge, so I reversed the blade. It'd kind of be good if I had a clamp too, but I have nowhere to put it and it'd make a huge mess since I can't cover the whole edge of the table in a plastic bag to collect wood shavings.

(I koped one of those giant plastic bags from Art Friend.)

Okay I am clearly rambling.

Today I met the MJC altos for dinner (Alicia, Joelin, Clara, Mindy) at Fish&Co. Basically all we did was camwhore and ogle my S90. It was pretty funny, I'd blog about the epic unglam moments (most of which came from Mindy) but I bet they'd ask me to remove them anyway (they are VERY unglam).

(And also I'm really short on time because I need to sleep soon and revise my music theory.)

My debit card came in the mail! YAY STEAM GAMES HERE I COME.

Friday:

Summary of week is as follows:

Monday - ZM and Cutter (-_-?)
Tuesday - SH (includes Koi and Crystal Jade for lunch. LIKEABOSS)
Wednesday - MJalto dinner
Thursday - Minijunior Dian random visit
Friday - Eng Hong/Erickson dinner

I need to be more careful with my words after yesterday, so I refuse to say that I feel blessed. I don't. I don't feel like I owe anyone anything for good things happening, life has just happened and I am happy about it, and that is enough.

Tweet: Other people visit their juniors. My juniors come and visit me. I AM POWERFUL or really pathetically disabled.

And also hungry. sadface

Sunday:

Today was a very impulse buy day.

I bought another handsaw (the Art Friend one kind of sucks, TBH) and lots of sandpaper and a bastard file and a diamond file and I feel really guilty.

I felt so guilty that when I got home Gmarket was having a sale and I bought 20 pairs of assorted leggings/stockings/socks.

Twenty. Pairs.

There is something seriously wrong with me today. I think I need to strap myself down.

Also, my weekend went more like:

Friday - LAN for 10 hours straight, get home at 8am
Saturday - Wake up at noon to go for food with Linus/EH
Sunday - Potter around sawing my plank, end up at Sun Ray Cafe with midfags (actually I am considered an oldfag but on/off so descended to midfag level I guess)

feeling slightly more cheerful now

2011-04-14T22:53:00.005+08:00

Today, was irritated by someone's behaviour (all this while I thought you knew when you were acting cute, but suddenly it dawned on me that you actually take yourself seriously) and discovered that one of only people I trust enough to vent on thinks it's cute and wants to do it too (or whatever).

Also too traumatised by aforementioned events to finish tedious things properly, had to totally scrap plans to study/shop online/work on competition stuff. And finally very dehydrated from all the crying. Help.

Strange part of conversation that stuck in my mind (I was actively trying to block out everything she said in case my brain overloaded from keeping track of all the fallacies and logical inconsistencies):

Woman: "So can I have your name (to write me a note on some prayer card she insisted on giving me)?"

Me: "Sherlyn. (spells it for her)"

Woman: "Oh! What a strange name, where did you get it from? Like, a book or a movie or something?"

Me: "(extremely confused) .. My parents gave it to me."

Woman: "Really? (suspicious look) Oh. That's strange. That's... an interesting name."

Seriously.

Is it not enough that after I got into JC2 all my juniors started picking on me because my voice was too low (which nobody has ever mentioned in my entire life)?

No. No.

Now my name is funny too. And also pretentious, she seemed to be implying. Hofuck I've had a poser name all my life and people must have been thinking what a moron I am to have given myself an odd name.

Just.. go impale yourselves on large blunt rocks, please, all of you.

it's me i'm cathy i've come home!

2011-04-11T23:28:00.004+08:00

OMG NOSTALGIA. Dr S played this for us in class and I was so traumatised by the non sequitur that I kept going "I'm confused. I'm confused. I'm confused" over and over.

Kate Bush somewhat pwns Lady Gaga.

I hate the Hayley Westenra version, it just sounds too cute and not psycho enough.

Red version!

My favourite Kate Bush song, though, is Babooshka, just because the MV is awesome and has her in some gladiator outfit.

RUNDARIA

2011-04-11T02:23:00.004+08:00

http://gobarbra.com/hit/new-645f32750c843bb7c5cf6bdd19316e72

Okay just.. how awesome is this?

(According to SH, DOES NOT RUN ON MAC.)

"Sir can you please put on your shirt? If you do this again I'll have to throw you out of the club."

2011-04-10T11:43:00.010+08:00

Yesterday I went for SOY'C. It was pretty good, actually, it felt a bit like the EOYs we used to have 5 years ago - not too crowded, nobody retarded.

Only EOY was at Expo. SOY'C was in like Mexico or something, which is Ngee Ann Poly, which is in Clementi.

And also free hugs, but I didn't get any because one of them was a V cosplayer (from V for Vendetta) which sent me into horrible fangirl spasms and I was too shy to actually hug him (even when they whole bunch of them was attracted by the cute cat speaker and came right over to where I was stoning).

I have a new resolution. I'm only going to marry Johnny Depp if I can't marry V.

The morning started out when Tenma and I pottered off to get my wood sticks. It is totally unnatural for me to go for events not holding sticks, so we went to get them since IKEA Alexandra was on the way to Clementi anyway (the whole damn world is on the way to Clementi).

The only person I knew who was cosplaying that day was Harenai as some Matryoushka thing from Nico Nico Douga which was actually really cute. I'd buy that jacket and wear it if someone sold it outside.

And I can't be bothered to shop the photos bleh.

It's bloody ridiculous the number of Vocaloid cosplayers that were there. Also, most of them looked like they got their costumes straight off Taobao, so what's with that?

The girl who won the cosplay competition had a totally tailored costume too. Ugh. I am personally against allowing people who buy their costumes in entirety to compete, or at least against people who made at least some of their own stuff, so this was pretty annoying.

After stoning around for a few hours headbopping to music from a ridiculously cute Monster Hunter dancing cat speaker, I was invited to go club at Butter Fac with Tenma's bunch (of like 8-ish cosplayer friends who happened to be extremely cool d'oh).

I was too lazy and braindead to come up with a clubbing outfit, so I just yanked my black tank top down over my shorts til it looked like a lumpy minidress. Also I wore contacts, which was a good choice because glasses are highly unglam.

Rules of clubbing that only apply to Butter Fac:

1. There is shufflin. This is hard to do in heels.
(Does not apply to Zirca since you can hardly move anyway.)

2. Don't get made out with by horny angmohs.
(And don't stare at the SPGs grinding with horny angmohs. Or the random queen who is wearing very short shorts and sitting full-length on the countertop blowing kisses at people despite being about 100kg and a guy.)

3. Don't strip.
(You really don't want to know, other than: no it wasn't me who took a shirt off. Suffice to say the bouncer comes up to you and glares at you really hard until you put your shirt back on, and the next day someone posts a video of you on Facebook.

Actually, I'm not sure if this only applies to guys.)

4. Learn to shuffle. This is important.

Rules of clubbing that still stand from previous analysis:

1. Don't wear glasses (if you're a girl, I think for a guy this isn't debauchery) unless they are bling cat's eye glasses or something.

2. Wear makeup. At least eye.

3. Finish your drink coupons. I am getting really annoyed by the taste of cranberry vodka.

Also, I drank a Flaming Lamborghini. It was really on fire, and tasted really good, only Tenma drank half of it so I barely got high.

It was fun, other than the moments I missed you and suddenly felt like the loneliest person in the world.

I am starting to forget how being happy feels like, not that I've ever gone clubbing without missing you or know how that feels, either. It is starting to creep into my life: I will be sitting there perfectly fine, and then something will remind me of you and send me spiralling into a horrible bout of angst.

In other news, I am REALLY VERY ANNOYED at the fact that my mail is not coming. I am waiting for about a gazillion parcels and nothing is here! WHAT IS THIS.

Also some moron left a Body Shop shampoo in the cupboard outside my house. If it wasn't the same morons who put random things there (like some girl's primary school uniform, and random very lian-looking sandals, among other things) then I am very annoyed because that means it was for me and I am being stalked and also simultaneously insulted because even my stalker thinks I have shitty hair.

Jin Kai, it had better not fucking be you, because I am highly mortified and my parents are very confused (my dad found it) and hello use your common sense I don't even check the damn cupboard, ever.

Whoever it was had better own up now because we are about to throw it away (we don't even know if it's actually spiked with Veet or something) and it cost about 20 bucks, which makes me very sad.

FML, seriously.

I am not even the kind of person who complains that no guys like me, I am just complaining about my sad unrequited crush here, so can weird things please stop happening?

This includes the bloody guy from the shop outside who insists on talking to me every single fucking time I forget to block him on MSN (I feel kind of guilty because I disturb my junior about every single day too, but that is his fault for being too cute and having ex-moles and Hair With History). I am pretty disturbed. I've been trying not to blog about it in case he somehow manages to stalk me to my blog, but now whatever I don't really care.

Also he cannot make conversation without accusing me of being a slacker and uploading photos of my friends at the shop/not going out with my (fake) boyfriend/revealing that he has been stalking my FB, including my photos, and I "look even more beautiful without glasses" (despite my claims that I have a boyfriend) and complaining about how much his life sucks.

Hi if this is his version of girl-suanning (according to my JC1 chinese teacher, you must suan girls and then they will like you) it is definitely not working because I just feel like punching his face.

Also the other day he randomly hit the glass of the shop really hard with his palm and left a gigantic fucking handprint there which I am pretty sure I'll have to clean soon, along with all the droolmarks from people ogling the baby grand.

And before that he also prank-called me on the shop phone ("Hello, Tempest? You can go home already you know it's 7.30") and went red when I asked if he was the one who called on the way out, and also IDK why he squished his face against the glass door and told me they were turning the lights off soon.

Ugh can the world please make itself simpler by having the guy I actually like do this (apart from the glass banging and face squishing)?

I am going to end up waiting forever, aren't I. (All I have's a dream of you, but til I wake it'll have to do.)

2011-04-09T19:26:00.001+08:00

I don't understand religion, you don't understand cosplay, let's call it quits for now.

than any boy you'll ever meet

2011-04-08T13:52:00.006+08:00

When I Am Upset By Something And Talk About Something Else #2:

I like the Crispy M&Ms.

I remember very clearly how I ended up eating them, really long ago in primary school: The first time I got to choose my own M&M flavours, I wanted the blue packet because it looked pretty.

That was, I think, slightly before my sister discovered that she was allergic to chocolate and basically I had nobody to buy me chocolates any more since my mother is anti-junk food, my brother will hoard them in his room, and my dad tends to eat them all himself.

Also, today I finally started trying to study music theory. My guy friends are mostly passing out soonish and I am sadly entering BMT (basic music theory). Ugh.

At the moment nothing is happening except I am getting good at not drawing treble clefs wrong, and also saying the first six letters of the alphabet backwards and forwards (occasionally with a H in there which comes after G).

I've finished most of Grade 1 theory, had to skim through the last few pages about tonic triads and blah because I had to close the shop. Next week I shall do some theory specimen papers and get Pillow to mark them. :D

Soon I will be needing to put up some sort of schedule booking system for my weekends, because it's ridiculous. This one looks like:

Saturday morning - Starbucks with Tenma, afternoon - go for SOY'C, evening - allowance for getting shanghaied into going out for dinner as usual

Sunday morning - vegetate, afternoon - extort money, evening - Kim/Gloria/guys.

:D

In a phrase, what's upsetting me today (it sort of got worse over the afternoon) is basically the J2 reaction to their PW results.

I am particularly disgusted by one of them who got a B and is basically refusing to let anyone who got an A be happy. He reminds me a bit of that mad Japanese minister who wanted to ban cherry blossom viewing because there was a tsunami and everyone should be feeling all sad.

Thankfully, just now he suddenly made a miraculous comeback and is cheerful again, so I guess I can forgive him, slightly.

Dude: "I may not be important in your life, but you are damn important in mine."

Yeah, that's about the summary of my life right now: annoying minor character.

have you ever seen the rain / pouring down on a sunny day

2011-04-07T12:01:00.009+08:00

I'm hungry. Also the last post seems elderly considering the number of things that have been happening over the past few days, so I shall blog.

Work is fun. On Monday Harenai came to visit me (I haven't seen her physically in YEARS) and she is so cute and tall now 8D AND I AM SEEING HER AGAIN ON SAT (unless I cannot find her which is highly possible) FOR SOY'C! On Tuesday was Jiamin who sat there keeping me company/playing the baby grand for like 4 hours.

TKGS CHOIR IS ALL.

I want a chocolate cake for lunch, one with those crunchy biscuit/chocolate bits inside and the nice glossy melty chocolate layer on top and mousse inside. (I used to survive on Secret Recipe's Americanos until they stopped selling them.) A whole chocolate cake.

Or maybe half chocolate, half cheese. And the cheesecake must be as edible as those terribly good chocolate teacup cheesecakes at Jack's Place. Without the biscuit base. Preferably with a chewy crust on top.

SCREW THIS I AM GOING TO BUGIS TO BUY MYSELF PASTRY NOW.

Later:
My juniors are so cute. They're more excited about donating blood than about PW results.

I still haven't figured out what I am going to do with the stupidly pretty journals I bought. They are weighing on my mind.

Also, I started tearing up and standing on my chair to scream while watching this:

T___T

Read the comments.

Dremux117: Hmm, am I the only one who wants to yell "Guys! She isn't really there!!" ?

WaffleLunatic: @Dremux117 Yes, you are.

&$*@^&$@^$ I SHOULD HAVE GONE FOR THE ANISONG CONCERT IN SINGAPORE LAST YEAR NONONONONO.

when we live such fragile lives

2011-04-04T14:57:00.004+08:00

Lomo redscale film!

I am kind of confused as to why some of the photos are less red than others - doesn't seem to have anything to do with available light or anything. Wonder if it's the processing shop. Huh.

Those are the two giant cats on Orchard Road the other day. They look bigger when you put them next to small children, like those giant lily pad things.

Tadaa humongous cats.

MPLT.

I like that last photo. Reeks of pedobearism.

i'm on the right track baby

2011-04-03T01:36:00.005+08:00

Lazy to think of words. PHOTOSPAM!

I'm actually pretty impressed with the Libraries/Windows Live Photo Gallery sync, it's made uploading photos more straightforward. I'm usually dubious of syncing programs (iTunes..) but this hasn't messed me up so far.

(Plus it's basically my only option because there's nothing else I can quickly edit exposure/colors with using Windows 7. ._. )

eragon

2011-04-02T21:08:00.002+08:00

Okay, this is where I sound utterly evil.

The first book of Eragon wasn't so bad. The annoying cliche of hot elf girl wasn't enough to put me off reading a potentially Tolkien/Rowlingesque series. I was plenty damn irritated by the sheer lack of depth (pun/redundancy not intended) in the characters but okay, the book had a really nice cover*.

By the 2nd book I'd doomed myself. I have to buy the rest of the series, otherwise it wouldn't look nice on my shelf (and also I'd seem like I was too poor to get the rest).

Oh god. The third book was not the end. It became a giant horrific tome which made no sense whatsoever and isn't even ending on the 4th book. What, is he trying to plagiarise Tolkien even further, to the extent that he's going to write 'a trilogy in ___ parts' as well?

At least Rowling, if not completely consistent, makes me happy with her small oblique references to mythology and lore. Her books actually seem (more or less, increasingly in the first few) like she planned where they were going.

Paolini has no idea where his books are going. There's just more and more strange things cropping up that I highly doubt he will be able to tie up by the last book. It's just not possible - there's one major prophecy per installment, none of which have been resolved satisfactorily yet (other than those we already saw coming - long-lost brother, Jedi Master is his dad, evil guy is evil, elf is tsundere, so many damn dragons all over the place).

Eragon is going to have to do some serious questing to get anywhere by the end of the 4th book, and

'Eragon' is just a lame name, by the way. Coming up with bull like 'replacing the D in Dragon with an E!' is for minor characters. Possibly even random posters on a random wall as your main characters are escaping the (Death Eaters..) antagonists. Lousy thought processes like that should not be allowed more than a one-line mention.

I do not even want to elaborate on how he cannot even come up with better names for his characters and stole them from Tolkien, so:

http://www.facebook.com/group.php?gid=2221584464

The Eragon Is A Work Of Pure Intellectual Plagiarism Facebook group. Join it. The admin is hilarious and doesn't seem to get annoyed at the morons who join the group and are puzzled as to why it isn't a fanboyfest (they probably don't even know what 'intellectual plagiarism' means). I'd never have the patience.

http://www.facebook.com/pages/Eragon-is-essentially-Twilight-for-Boys/166499386712353

Title is self-explanatory.

Also, http://elleirabird.blogspot.com/2011/03/special-post-sporking-eragons-epic-poem.html - highly entertaining analysis of the epic poem that Eragon wrote. At the time of reading, I actually assumed that Paolini was deliberately making Eragon sound like a moron to demonstrate his.. moronism. Even the elves were avoiding commenting on his cata.

I sincerely hope this was the case, and not that Paolini's miniscule vocab couldn't handle figuring out how to praise his own poem.

Finally, http://eragon-sporkings.wikispaces.com - ultimate chapter-by-chapter analysis (read: slamming) of the Inheritance series.

I am off to read it now - seems decent, though might have missed out a few overarching bits since it's chapterwise.

*This is probably how Twilight started off: nice cover. Millions of horny teenage girls pick it up. A year later, horrifying the lit scene everywhere.

so i wrote it in a love song

2011-04-02T20:02:00.006+08:00

Today I got annoyed and ended up buying a lot of stuff. Someone keep my money away from me.

I got my BRS figma! HAPPY HAPPY JOY JOY all I need is the Black Rock Death (Dead?) Master/Black Gold Saw figmas. Actually I like the small white gorilla girl more but it doesn't seem to have been released as a figma yet.

BRS was $49.90 at Funz Center (what kind of name is that), Orchard Central Level 3.

Weirdly, a random lady stopped me in the middle of Orchard Road as I was walking along and asked me how much I got my figma for. I was very confused and asked if she meant the radio bag, but no, she wanted to know how much the figma cost. Huh. FELLOW DESPO OTAKUS UNITE.

She's now sitting on top of my CPU looking awesome. YES GOOD COINCIDENCE, my CPU case turned out to be blue which matches her! 8D

I also got the Penguin Classics editions of Heart of Darkness (Joseph Conrad) and War and Peace (Leo Tolstoy). I might not survive reading them, they look awful really.

I officially love figmas. I couldn't stand it any more and ended up unpacking everything to take photos outside Ngee Ann City, and figmas are magic. I thought she only had two sets of hands, but it's actually 5 sets (they sneakily hid the rest in the small compartment at the bottom).

There's even an utterly pointless white block with slots in it to store the extra hands, and a little ziploc bag to put all the extra parts in. LOVE.

Paint and everything is perfect, no need to mention. Actually, her hip seems a bit weirdly jointed and lists to the right, but I'm too lazy to pluck off her legs and figure out why, so it isn't really the manufacturer's fault.

MADE OF WIN.

Okay, honestly, some of the figma models are not as cute. IMO the only other one that looks almost as good as the BRS one is Hatsune Miku Append. Even the BRDM/BGS figmas are so-so.

This particular figma also came with a DVD, which made me happy. (The whole OVA is available on Youtube anyway, but still. My hoarder brain demands that I get a DVD.)

Unfortunately, while watching it, this happened:

Y U DO DIS 2 ME?

Today on Orchard Road there were a lot of people collecting donations for Japan. It was weird. There was a random Darth Vader walking around and someone put their two Maine Coons in the middle of nowhere to let people take photos of them (they were humongous and looked like small bored lions, so this was most successful).

Sadly this was one of the miserable times in my life I didn't bring enough cameras, so I ended up taking photos using my Nikon FE and can't upload anything until earliest Monday. :|

2011-04-02T02:41:00.004+08:00

April Fools' Day: THAT DAY I DO NOT KNOW HOW TO PUNCTUATE. I put an apostrophe in there and consulted Wiki, which agreed with me.

Jerome:
April fools. The day you have the courage to tell somebody something that you've always been afraid of saying. Went to ji siao all my friends saying I have had a crush on them since damn long. But I told the truth to that somebody.. And her reaction makes me lol.

WHY DID I NOT THINK OF THIS? God. Then again, I think most of my friends are too smart to fall for it (or so ego they'd believe I really have a crush on them for the next millennia).

.. Why is Blogger telling me millennia is misspelled?! IT'S REALLY A WORD WHAT, WIKI SAYS SO.

Today was quite a joke, woke up late for work and started sneezing (my nose was already sore from yesterday's horror flu virus) and ended up taking leave. Poor boss.

Went home and tried to remember what I did with my CCA records, couldn't, and ended up falling asleep (lying on bed to remember is bad idea) until the afternoon, woke up ravenously hungry and now the house is barren of junk food.

(I have been having weirder and weirder dreams. This afternoon it was a very elaborate, fairly enjoyable story about the FMA characters running from unknown forces across an RO-like world map and getting cornered in a dungeon which felt like Ayothaya. Eventually they used random alchemy to save themselves and broke the 4th wall when they transmuted a deck of cards with various anime characters on them, reminiscent of those from Anime Connection I used to have - cameo appearances by the cast of Rurouni Kenshin and Vandread - and realise that they are just 2D characters in a story themselves, then escape into an alternate fictional universe.

This actually sounded a lot like the plot of the first FMA anime. Yes my dreams are very strange.)

I am petrified over university applications, because I have terrible foresight/luck applying for schools. My tactic this time was to put everything according to a balance of practicality/wants (which is why biomed is no longer an option, I'd just die a horrible burn-ey death trying to cope with another 4 years of science).

I don't even dare tell people (other than Miyo) what order/courses I put down, because everyone is so rough nowadays I cannot handle their tactlessness any more.

your desperation is not unique / infatuation of the week

2011-03-30T14:32:00.011+08:00

Wednesday:

I got my first set of photos from the Nikon FE back! They are gorgeously contrasty and such! Sadly most of them are blur. Looks like hand shake. Pretty depressing.

I also forgot to take the CD out of the shop computer, so will just blog about the photos that have been uploaded (I'm at home now).

.. Okay actually I have nothing to say about anything because every day is bleh. Hi, this is my dad. He has a mustache. I will be very upset if my future husband has a mustache like my dad's, because it is all prickly and not naise to kiss (according to my mum).

I started a new senbazuru but gave up because I am never fast enough to wish for anything good with it.

On monday the TKGS altos turned up at the shop to visit me/ambush Putt. It was a marvel of guile. First Jiamin tricked Putt into thinking nobody else was coming. Then the juniors showed up and tricked me into thinking they were going to make me sit in the shop by myself until 7.30.

After that we tricked Putt (again) to Fish & Co and made her stand on a chair while they sang her a birthday song and everything. TEEHEE. Also I do not want to celebrate any birthdays with them, it is extremely dangerous.

They gave me this voodoo doll. It's so cute. I LOVE HUGH JACKMAN. Sadly at the moment I am tempted to actually stick pins into it because I am severely annoyed.

Actually, I really need to upload all my photos and stuff. I realised that most of the photos are not being uploaded because I get too excited over the next roll that comes out, and also I am too lazy to load them to an actual website other than Blogger.

Recently my mini junior Dian (this is about as far down as it goes, beyond their batch I don't think I know any more juniors) has been asking me about Holgas and film and stuff. I directed her to my I HATE HOLGAS rant. I think I need to write another rant, because that one clearly did not encompass enough of the horror.

(Side note: has anyone noticed that the guys in Taylor Swift's MVs are getting progressively better looking? My family's teeth are on edge now, because I have gone from the Westlife phase to the Taylor Swift phase and it is very quickly descending into a Do As Infinity stage.)

Thursday:

It's another Iamsickintheshopgah day.

Discovered this interesting-looking Blogger function, Mosaic: http://rundaria.blogspot.com/view/mosaic (They just introduced this bunch of new layouts and this is the best-looking one IMO.)

I feel so lousy, most of my photos are walloftext so my mosaic doesn't look pretty. Must buck up. >_>

2011-03-29T13:07:00.001+08:00

Earthquakes for energy? (IF PEOPLE IN THE FMAVERSE CAN DO IT, BET WE CAN TOO.)

when i am peeved about something and complain about something else.

2011-03-28T22:06:00.003+08:00

I do not trust small children.

Firstly, they tell you lies. They will come up to you and say 'excuse me are you a princess?' and you never know if they are trying to be ingratiatingly cute or not. They probably don't mean it at all, they are just saying so because they heard it somewhere. I'd rather have adults bitch about me than small kids say I am a princess.

Secondly, you are not allowed to enjoy their attention. If you are in the slightest bit happy that a barely conscious being just said you are pretty/magical/whatever, you must lead a bloody sad life. You must also not be trying hard enough to make other people like you.

Thirdly, I was a bloody conniving little kid. I knew perfectly well what I wanted: to be a dog named Rainbow, because then if I saw annoying adults I didn't like I could growl and bite them and embarrass them in front of all their friends, instead of having to be painfully cute all the time just because I was a small girl.

I much prefer introverted kids, the ones who will huddle together in a corner of the departmental store while their parents are off doing grocery shopping, while they make little kiddy friends playing with their gameboys and whatever. Extroverted kids who will attempt to make friends with adults are just sneaky little brats.

End.

i bet she never had a back street guy

2011-03-28T15:27:00.003+08:00

There is something seriously wrong with my brain. I am getting very scared of my own mood swings.

Okay, it's more or less not random bouts of anything, but the slightest push in any direction can get me in a screaming rage/puddle of depression/disproportionate cheer almost instantly.

This is what happens when you are desperately trying to shake off a crush and are repressing everything. (I'm keeping it in check at the moment by spamming Westlife songs.)

Anyhow, CAMERA.

It was mailed on 11th March and arrived 24th March, which I guess is okay.

I'd actually more or less lost hope that it'd every arrive since it took ages and my boss told me a lot of the packages which transit through Japan were stuck. To my elation, when I got home yesterday there was a squat cuboid package for me.

My dad got very excited. He was like YOUR CAMERA IS HERE +_+ and proceeded to depress me with the story of how he threw all his Yashica/Polaroid cameras and lenses away. (This also distracted him from the fact that I was carrying a miniature rotary saw. Read on.)

I am getting good at opening parcels and such because of the sheer volume of things that go through the shop every day, so I sawed the package open with my house keys (too lazy to go into my room and find a penknife).

Sheer camera-ey joy ensued. Everything was already nicely set up, there wasn't any camera case or anything (the case for this particular camera is gorgeous but insanely expensive, and I lost the auction with a case in it)

.. And then the panic set in.

Issue #1:

Shit omg why's it so heavy?!

I swear that camera weighs as much as my D90 and is half the size. It is probably made of galvanized titanium, which is what I told SH to justify that it is probably impossible to break, because:

Issue #2:

I don't know how to put the film in.

It's not even like I haven't used film cameras before. The F55 didn't come with an instruction manual and I managed to trial-and-not-really-error-because-it's-brainless-ly open the film back.

With the FE, not so. There are hardly any helpful friendly pictorial markings on it, just numbers and foreign concepts like ASA (which I assume is the same as ISO). And a lot of knobs.

By the little clicky noises I figure out what most of the knobs are, and I still can't find the back cover release.

At t=15 mins, d(my irritation)/d(time) approaches 1, and I give up and ask my dad how to open it.

At t=30 mins, we both give up and look for an instruction manual online.

One hour later, I am staring very confusedly at the instructions which I have followed to the letter and still the film back is not coming off. This is very distressing and I tweet photogeek classmate Jonathan for help.

By the time he responds I have already figured it out: ARM STRENGTH. You have to pull the film winding knob upwards with the force of a small horrible goblin. After I informed SH of my major victory, she told me I was probably going to break the camera.

Unfortunately I couldn't take any photos with it because the batteries were flat (they're those tiny watch-type ones which Ken Rockwell claims, on his stupid review site, will last for 20 years or so. This is probably true because the only thing I see them actually powering is the battery life notification light). I popped the film in.

Repeat whole process of confusion when I realised you can't catch the spool the normal way, you have to slot it BEHIND the spool and thread it through the slot.

tldr; This is an antique camera.

Issue #3:

WHY IS THE MODE LOCKED?

After prodding around for a good half hour, I realised that most of the dials on the camera are locked and you have to press those little things that look like screws before you can turn them.

Issue #4:

Eeyur my shutter button very ugly. It's not even a button, it's a hole with a nut in it. This is fundamentally wrong because everyone knows nuts should not go in holes and therefore I need to screw it properly so it will look naise.

This is important plothole for later.

All this aside, the camera is magic. Not as magical as the F55, because there's no S mode - the Auto mode is basically Aperture Priority, other than that there's Manual , the end. I ganked my Holga's strap, which is fugly but will do for the moment.

There doesn't seem to be a way to attach a handgrip-type strap, which is sad because the camera is not very hand-friendly and threatens to fall and die at any moment (there is a dent in the outer ring of the lens, from the previous owner, which attests to this).

I am madly in love with the focusing screen, which has a split-screen/microprism ring combination and is really easy to use (photo stolen from somewhere else, the one above was a very sad attempt to shoot through the viewfinder).

Basically you turn the focusing ring until the image is clear in the microprism ring (2nd innermost circle) as well as aligned properly in the split-screen (double semicircles). This is very fun. Cute junior Fiona tried it in the shop, it took about 2 minutes to take one photo, but it's FUN. I think.

Kind of sucks because you will never be able to zipai with it.

The camera was also a bit grimy in the corners, but I swabbed it with cotton buds so it's okay-looking now, except for the faux leather bits which you can probably clone people from the scrapings off of.

The little slot for putting a bit of paper/card in is also very cute. If I had a boyfriend/kid/pet that didn't look like a small demonic black blob, I'd put their photo in the slot. Right now it has part of the film box in it because I couldn't think of anything better.

I also packed my room because it started getting impossible to move at all in it. Now at least the floor is clear, and I can start working on making space for a camera cupboard. (The Holga will be banished to the dusty shelf because it is not even a real camera, pff.)

interlude:

OH. Danny Tan dropped in to visit me at the shop today! It was slightly freaky because I have not seen him in about 6 years and he looks 1. paler, 2. shorter and 3. hairer. I think this is because he was in NS the last time we met (and I got taller since secondary school). :l

back to scheduled program:

Tenma and I were supposed to go out to visit the kittens on Saturday (Sparkles had 5 tiny squiggly kittens).

At 2pm when we were supposed to meet, this happened:

Me: I'm hungry I haven't had lunch yet and I need coffee and I just woke up.

Tenma: Rundy I have very very bad news for you.

Me: And I think my classmates just cancelled on me for dinner. AGAIN

Tenma: Uhhh Rundy I really have very bad news for you.

Me: Coffeeeeee. KITTEHS

Tenma: Yeah I think Kei totally forgot we were going over.

So we decided to go look for a shutter button.

It turned into an epic quest.

You know those games with ridiculous distances between all the towns/NPCs so they get to claim longer play times? Yes this was it.

Mission #1: Go to Camera Hospital at Sunshine Plaza. Speak to Guy in Shop.

(half an hour later)

Guy in Shop: Ooh nice camera (re: Nikon FE).

Me: Thanks. Do you have a shutter release button for this?

Guy in Shop: Hm. Soft release button? Nope. Try that uncle at Burlington Square. Yes the Triple D one.

New Mission: Go to Triple D at Burlington Square. Speak to Camera Uncle.

(half an hour later)

Camera Uncle: Wut, we don't sell camera stuff here.

Me: Guy in Shop sent me.

Camera Uncle: Nawww try those camera shops at Sim Lim.

New Mission: Traipse around Sim Lim until you find a shutter button.

(half an hour/5 camera shops later)

Tenma: I don't think this is working.

Me: Yeah.

(Abandon Quest? Y)

Me: Maybe we should try those repair shops at Peninsula.

Tenma: Yup.

New Mission: Go to Peninsula Plaza. Investigate Camera Shops.
(Speak to NPCs from each shop.)

(half an hour later)

Guy at Shop #1: Nope.

Guy at Cathay Photo: Nope.

Guy at Shop Opposite Shop #1: We have a cable release do you want that?

Shop #2: IS CLOSED

Me: FML. Wait, I need to buy a blank CD to burn stuff for my wife.

Tenma: Okay let's go to Funan.

Track Mission: Buy Blank CD

Tenma: We need to go to Black Tac!

Me: Yeah yeah whatever. Wait, do they sell any random screws I can stick into my camera?

Tenma: ...

(half an hour later)

Me: .. Dude. This random button on the replica lightsaber looks exactly like the one that goes into my camera!

Tenma: ........

Black Tac guy: We don't sell that. Try the hardware shops at Adelphi.

OKAY TLDR SUMMARY: Went back to shop #2, discovered it was closed, went to Adelphi, trudged all 4 levels before finally finding camera shop and getting ripped for $12 bucks for a tiny little screw.

At least I have a tiny screw now! *glows*

It says Nikon on it though, which is slight overkill because my lens cap and camera and button all say Nikon now (not to mention strap, bag, other cameras and brain). Bleh whatevs I will live.

After that we went to Dhoby Gaut to ambush Kei and see kittens. THEY ARE SQUIRMY AND ADORABLE. Also I forgot that Misha is actually Rukia who was in my VK group in like 2007 (or something?) so hi happy random remeeting.

I'm considering cosing for this year's Cosfest but bleh cannot think of anything I want to do. I am very outdated.

Also, I bought a paper cutter. It's a small circular blade mounted on a head thing which is attached to a rule, and I like it a lot. You have no idea how often I need things to be cut in straight lines, and because I am atas I cannot use a mere penknife to do it.

This was an extremely tedious post. -_-

champagne supernova

2011-03-28T12:19:00.004+08:00

Kind of depressing being a cosplayer because all your hair colouring daydreams end in "Wait, but I can just buy a wig for this".

Hair urges over past few years:

1. Blue+pink+purple fringe ("No Sherlyn it only looks good on angmohs." -SH)

2. Blue+seafoam+purple gradient underlayer, brown upper layer ("That sounds extremely lian." -Sister)

3. Ombre light blue+teal downward gradient ("No that's like Vocaloid Holic The Infinity only teal, they'll think your hairdresser is colourblind" -Brain)

4. Double rainbow sideways gradient (".. Do whatever you want." -Mum)

5. Teal+black bicolour ("Wait do you have this obsession with teal or something?" -EH)

6. Red+black (or whatever colour my hair is now) bicolour (Cautionary tale - Yunyun)

7. White with green/red highlights ("No you'll look like Sephiroth with highlights" -Junior)

:(

Right now I really want to do #7 but the double bleaching might break all my spindly hair off so I'm probably just going to bleach and get green highlights.

2011-03-24T23:47:00.001+08:00

I don't much mind people gossiping about me. I just hope they will say, at the end: "But honestly, I never know what she's thinking, or if everything is a crazy experiment to stave away her own boredom."

I got my Nikon FE today and a new paper cutter! Will blog tomo, watch this post.

2011-03-24T18:19:00.003+08:00

OKAY THIS IS GETTING RIDICULOUS HOW BUSY CAN MY WEEKENDS GET THAT THEY HAVE TO ENCROACH INTO MY THURSDAYS/MONDAYS AS WELL!?

2011-03-23T16:05:00.004+08:00

Grammar is important. Capital letters are the difference between helping your Uncle Jack off a horse & helping your uncle jack off a horse.

@jiteshpillaai

"He say to the one, 'If you make noise, it's your sister I kill, not you.' He say that same to the other. You see?"

"He kill them with they love," John said. "They love for each other. You see how it was?"

-Stephen King, The Green Mile

next month last year

2011-03-20T22:49:00.010+08:00

FUN FUN FUN FUN.

Today EH and I met up with Linus for lunch at Nihonmura (Tampines) and rediscovered the joys of Westlife. (Clue: Do not order their tako sashimi. The mentaiko dishes are good.)

Seriously. Everyone knows Westlife. They have such friendly lyrics that you can more or less guess the next line from the last word of the first.

I was trying to explain to EH why 'Way Back Into Love' is a very KI song.

Step 1: I have weird thoughts about Life, the Universe and Everything.

I've been hiding all my hopes and dreams away
Just in case I ever need 'em again someday
I've been setting aside time
To clear a little space in the corners of my mind

Step 2: I feel extremely unfulfilled because I can't tell people my weird thoughts.

I've been watching but the stars refuse to shine
I've been searching but I just don't see the signs
I know that it's out there
There's got to be something for my soul somewhere

I've been looking for someone to shed some light
Not somebody just to get me through the night
I could use some direction
And I'm open to your suggestions

Step 3: DOUBT AND REGRESSION.

There are moments when I don't know if it's real
Or if anybody feels the way I feel
I need inspiration
Not just another negotiation

Uh, okay, not really, I may just be a KI moron.

Then we went shopping. It was supposed to be a let's go home thing. While we were in the car, I decided I didn't want to take off her jacket because it's awesome, so we agreed to abandon Linus for Uniqlo at Somerset.

Then EH decided she wanted to go to Dhoby Gaut to check out the blogshop outlets, and Dhoby Gaut basically means we must go to Cathay because it's awesome, so we rerouted: Plaza Sing -> Cathay -> Somerset 313 -> Cineleisure.

I loved Cine this morning, it has a bunch of awesome shops on the 3rd floor which just opened.

Unfortunately now I discovered that I love Cathay more, because of that wood would shop. I thought it was madly overpriced and full of stuff I could get elsewhere, but that's not true; they import things from chroniclebooks.com!

I got two journals. I LOVE THEM SO MUCH squirmsquirm.

The first one I fell in love with was the 'Now Apart, But Together Soon' journal with art by Jordan Crane. I walked up to it and decided I wanted it after looking at the green cover.

The cover art is gorgeous. It's so ridiculously good that I tracked down the Chronicle Books website so I could write a review for it exalting it in the highest. The people have a slightly Usborne Puzzle World feeling (I was stuck with that series for a really long time when I was younger, and still have dreams about it now and then).

Both covers are printed in only two colours. The dude cover is dark/light green, and the girl one is orange/magenta. Okay, the orange/magenta seems like a clashing combination but in a nice artsy way.

I love the guy in the sea. I love how he's wearing a suit, and his suit is white (though there is a highly likely causal link between being a dick and wearing a white suit to your JC prom). I love his bowtie and how he seems to have fallen out of nowhere, backwards. I love how the water is gloopy and swirly.

I love the girl in the fire. Okay, I wish she weren't so fat, in all honesty, because the lack of detail on her clothes compared to the guy is saddening. Also, she's not wearing a bra. I love her elbow and the way her right arm looks, and the little tendrils of hair, and the violent orange brightness of the whole scene.

The spine reads 'now apart, but together soon' and the artist's name (Jordan Crane, in case you have severe short term memory like me and didn't realise I already wrote it up there, like I apparently just did), and Chronicle Books. I couldn't find this journal on his website, and panicked, but thankfully the other notebook I got had their website.

I also love the tongue-in-cheek way these two are going to be together soon as in roasted/drowned = dead. Sorry.

I can't help thinking this would make a really good couple journal (or, as I noted in my review on the Chronicle Books website, a really good diary for schizoids/split personality people), because the cover illustrations are inverted and you can use either (or both) as the front. I'm planning to write on all the right side pages of the orange cover first, then flip over to the green cover and continue.

The pages inside are flowered with magenta/green themes. Weirdly, all of them have a slight orange burn coming from the middle, but this looks intentional. The notebook's bound in that magical way I love that won't crack the spine when you open it.

I officially love Chronicle Books journals.

The second journal I got is the 'Fuck You and Your Blog' journal by Ray Fenwick. I am probably gifting it so I shan't talk about it much, but the art is cute too and it has grids on every left-hand page instead of lines.

Okay, both were rather reasonably priced considering shipping and everything (they're 9.95 USD on the website, I got them for SGD 18, which means they scammed me of about $5) but if I buy any more I'm going to try ordering them straight from Chronicle Books. wood would is a nice shop but my measly salary is not as forgiving.

There is something about people who are loathe to write in new notebooks and ruin them. It's interesting.

I love getting a salary.

只能怪自己。

2011-03-19T23:03:00.003+08:00

Today was wife Gloria's birthday celebration, so Kim and I made her a pretty shirt in SGH and we had shabu for dinner and strawberry shortcake and watched Red Riding Hood, which must be the most irritatingly-ended movie ever.

Yeah my life's goal is to prance around in a horrifyingly long red cloak making love to a werewolf every half hour. WHAT? Also I think Anne Hathaway is (still) prettier than Amanda Seyfried.

(Trust me, I get annoyed when I post nonposts like this one too. It's just hard to upload photos becuase my net is so slow and annoying. Also, this morning I discovered that my FMA torrent finished - finally, after 16 days of torrenting and leaving my desktop on 24/7 - so basically I am swamped with things to do which include:

1. Uni applications - CURSE YOU 2K WORD NUS ESSAY and urge to alliterate every single line.

2. Guitar. If Chunyong gives me that ~_~ look one more time and asks whether I've learned Kimidori yet, I might explode my head with a taco.

3. Clean room. This is very severe, if I don't do it soon I won't be able to get out of bed in the morning without stomping on the miasma of camera/paper/uni booklet/clothing horrors, all slowly decomposing into coal on my floor.

At the moment I have to jump off my bed, literally, to avoid the moat of Stuff all around it which is about 1m wide. Considering that my entire room is only about 8x10, this is very scary.

4. Take photos. Gah.)

Also, my phone is a whole new evolution of dead (I suspect the phone bill got eaten by my room and it hasn't gotten paid, so the line's been cut off), so:

HANG IN THERE, SH. You are totally unfair, I knew the moment you called a raincheck, only I thought not to ask since you're probably all busy and depressed.

(If I don't know things, I will ask, I am extremely nosy. Shit, this was another Sherlyn-is-a-genius moment that I forgot to tell anyone about and now nobody will believe me.)

Clue: If I keep quiet after you tell me something this is a sign that I know more than you are saying and don't know how to respond without telling you so because everything is about to be weird and I am a stalker.

2011-03-18T13:02:00.003+08:00

I got my phone back, it was on the OPI shelf.

Music nowadays is so indescribably funny.

I went through this insane phase where I couldn't stop listening to Baby by Justin Bieber. I'd play it over and over and over again and dance madly on the way to the bus stop.

Two days ago I finally checked out that Rebecca Black thing. It is so bad I don't even.

I am starting to really really dread using Facebook, even though I sort of am compelled to, because there are a lot of things that I am trying to run away from on it.

Today was about the epitome of how my days go: I woke up in a blind panic, went to get my phone, read more random articles on endangered species and the argument for religion, and ended up on shopping websites trying to buy Docs.

(I have money now, this is very dangerous.)

Also, someone reading my blog really hates NTU. >_>

today was a shit day, we so excited, we-we so excited

2011-03-17T23:00:00.005+08:00

I am grouchy.

If grouchy were a gorge it'd be one of those fucking stupid bugged corners in WoW where you accidentally fall into and can't get out again and your stupid Tauren runs in vain against the solid rock wall and the camera angle is so weird you can't even see where the fuck you are.

I couldn't find my stupid fucking phone. I couldn't find my stupid fucking phone because I went to Shokudo for dinner and probably left it there. I went to Shokudo for dinner because I had to cheer myself up after discovering that my mother forgot about my existence and didn't get any dinner for me.

I got into zen mode on the bus after I realised I'd lost my phone. By the time I reached home I was okay, until my mum repeatedly asked me how I'm going to pay for my uni applications (none of her business, since she's not going to pay for them anyway) and I got scolded for eating out because there was dinner at home and my dad didn't notice.

I then tried to turn on my room light. It refused to do so. It flickered in a fucking annoying epileptic fit inducing way.

Meanwhile, I went on MSN. Nobody stress-relievingly abusable (Keedrique) was online, and I was stared at by my fucking math teacher's face because my fucking junior is trying to make me not talk to him knowing I fucking hate the sight of my math teacher. I am pretty much sure that by the time I finish this post he will be done ignoring my highly irritated messages and have gone offline to sleep.

MY HATRED BURNS FROM THE CAVERNOUS DEEPS.

I cannot even go on facebook because random people will start talking to me and I have to fucking force myself not to tell them to fuck off because it's not nice.

Also my fucking credit card is not here yet but my bank statement is. I do not remember EVER withdrawing randomly large amounts of money and am too fucking irritated to figure out where the fuck they went. For all I know my subconscious has been fucking stealing money from my ATM and shoving it up my own vagina, which is why I'm having cramps right now.

I do not understand why the world has to conspire to fuck me over regularly once a month when I am at my most hormonally imbalanced. If this shit fucking happened while I was ovulating I'd probably sit on the counter flashing my underwear at everyone and cooing 'I LEFT MY PHONE SOMEWHERE INSIDE, WANT TO HELP ME SEARCH FOR IT BEFORE IT STARTS RINGING?' but no, it has to happen today.

THE WORLD HEAVES WITH MY TORMENT.

It doesn't help that the fucking horrible FRIDAY FRIDAY song is stuck in my fucking head screaming FUN FUN FUN FUN, or that I want to rant on twitter but nobody gives a flying fuck because they are all moaning about how fucking hard MBTs are. ARE YOU FUCKING STUPID? GO FUCKING STUDY AND STOP MOANING AND YOU WON'T FUCKING FAIL.

I never complained about studying because I didn't study, so WHERE IS THIS BAD KARMA COMING FROM?

ITS WRETCHED KINGDOMS QUAKE BENEATH MY RAGE.

This is utter bullshit.

I bashed myself on the back of the head with whatever was on hand (my house phone) for a very long time hoping I'd black out and not have to be grouchy any more. All that happened was that my brain jolted around until I retched and am now sitting around feeling extremely nauseous. And also my head hurts.

rejected potential uni application lines #2

2011-03-17T11:35:00.003+08:00

NTU: Share a meaningful event. or incident you have personally encountered.

"In 2011, I attended the NUS Open House. Although the event was a mere 4-hour long tour, it has made a deep impression on my outlook towards life, as well as how I will view the final years of my formal education.

Accompanied by a friend, the first thing we noticed upon entering the campus was the gross overuse of balloons to attract potential students. It may have reached your attention that the world is facing a helium shortage in the coming years, which may well send the manufacturing industries into a crisis as helium is a widely-used cooling agent, apart from its various appliances.

This was clearly a departure from their supposedly environmentally friendly stance in opening the Environmental Studies course, crafted to produce graduates who will be able to ensure a sustainable future.

Secondly, after attending a few of the faculty talks, I noticed that most of the powerpoint slides demonstrating the school's standing globally (NUS: ranked 27th worldwide) included the covert footer: "NTU: ranked 71/100th".

Although it is understandable that they would want to poach students from other schools, I disapprove of their direct sniping as well as the complete ignorance of other universities in Singapore such as SMU, which demonstrates their intense academic snobbery.

Most importantly, the NUS Open House instilled a passionate drive in myself - with the highly educated staff and current students as vectors - to get the hell away from their school because the estimated entry grades are ridiculous and I shouldn't waste my time applying for their courses.

As such, I feel I am perfect for your university as I obviously can't get in anywhere else vaguely reputable. "

rejected potential uni application lines

2011-03-16T23:42:00.001+08:00

NUS Environmental Studies #1

"Last year, while participating in an online cosmetics spree, I chose to purchase the Sustainable Shadow Box by Urban Decay Cosmetics as opposed to the alternatives such as the limited edition NYDC Set.

The eyeshadow set is made of sustainable materials such as bamboo and recycled paper, and is an inspiration to myself, demonstrating that man-made beauty can be an amalgamation of human construct and natural, environmentally friendly products.

Much like your university course, which combines the strengths of both the Arts and Social Sciences as well as Life Sciences, resulting in an unique course which endows skills customised to the needs of today's employers.

My passion for and concern over environmental issues, extending into my daily life, is a clear indicator that I am a perfect candidate for Environmental Studies."

NUS Environmental Studies #2

"Although I am physically repulsed by the thought of nature and going outdoors, to the extent that the phrase 'Chek Jawa field trip' could be patented as a dieting/bulimia-inducing mechanism for people of my phenotype given its stomach-heaving spontaneous response, my fervent wish to help the environment has propelled me to overcome this crippling disability.

I have developed the amazing ability to use Wikipedia and no longer need to go on the field myself."

2011-03-16T18:47:00.002+08:00

CLAY AIKEN.

I am addicted to his tiny glittery eyes and how he looks like that creepy boy from MAD magazine. And how he has no dance moves at all and the AWFUL HIDEOUS clothes he wears on the Jimmy Kimmel show and his very strange accent.

but it's the only way i hear your voice any more

2011-03-16T18:08:00.004+08:00

One day I will stop chasing you.

You will do your nonchalant walk and swagger away from me, exactly how you've been doing it for the past age, and think I will catch up in a moment to walk one step behind you, waiting for you to need me again.

You'll glance behind to be surprised at my brokenness yet again, and I won't be there.

When you next see me, years later, you will wonder if you meant anything at all.

I get by relishing the thought that you might feel as fucked up then as I am now.

so sad but true, for me there's only you

2011-03-14T00:17:00.012+08:00

I stuffed my phone into the depths of my bag because I don't care. At all. Which is why I've been sitting perfectly still for the past two hours in case it rings and I can't hear it over the sound of myself moving.

I'm turning into a social slut a la Linus. Not even sure how it happened, since all I was trying to do was fit everyone into my weekend since I'm never free on weekdays.

Demand and supply! I am clearly an Econs superstar waiting to be discovered.

Saturday:

I woke up and spent 45 minutes wrestling with the printer. I say 'the printer' even though there are 3 printers in my house, because mine is a POS and my sister's is out of bounds.

This printer was not bad, it's Brother DCPsomethingorother, but it's getting old and senile and decided to wobble off the edge of usability by paper jamming on every single sheet.

After coddling it and feeding it paper one sheet at a time and freeing the paper jams (which were nonexistent, I just had to pull the loosely stuck paper out of the feed tray) I finally managed to print poor Kim's 14 sheets of uni application documents, and headed out to Chinatown.

Chinatown doesn't really bring back memories except of carrying a lot of cloth/whipping my minions into carrying it 2-3 times a year. I forgot to say hi to the cloth auntie on the second floor because I met Kim's Big Wife and got all distracted by dessert.

I love milk pudding.

Then, because I was using my Nokia phone and the Moto was bitchy as well, I forgot that I was supposed to meet Tenma at 2 instead of 1 and woke him up. A few GURHHH RUNDY YES I'M AWAKEs later, we went to Funan to shop. For a keyboard.

I am very very anal about keyboards because they must be the exactly right amount of clicky and squishy (I'm not a touch-typist, I type with my left hand and 1-2 fingers on my right, so it's imperative that my keyboard is nice).

It took about 4 hours of wandering around Funan pissing salespeople off, but I finally bought a Logitech G110 and a Razer Abyssus from a shop on the 4th floor.

The salesgirl was extremely cute and reminded me of Black Rock Gorilla Girl (the one with short hair whose name I really can't remember who grows a really huge cannon on her arm and stuff).

By the time I got home at about 11 later, I started experiencing severe button/keyboard remorse, aided by one of my choir juniors. :l

(on twitter)

Me: YEAH RAZER BLACKADDER AND LOGITECH 110 TENMA IS THE MAN.

Kay: Blackadder? What's that, I use a Deathadder.

Me: OH FUCK FAILTTM. *DEATHADDER whatevs don't spoil my happy with your macho peripheral names!
... OH WAIT OH MY GOD I FAIL SO HARD I JUST REALISED I DIDN'T GET THE DEATHADDER I GOT SOMETHING ELSE AND I CANT REMEMBER ITS NAME.

Kay: Which one is it? If you tell me the price I can probably guess.

Me: Idk, the nooby one with no extra buttons? I got it for $54.

Kay: Isn't that a Krait?!

Me: NO. Okay I'll go home and check. (If it had a name as nooby as Krait I'd have gotten the Deathadder instead, trust me.)

Kay: Why didn't you get the Deathadder?! You get extra buttons for like $30 more! (Actually, it's about $20.)

Me: Because I won't use the extra buttons? ;_;

By this time I was feebly clawing at vines which were probably more irritatingly-named snakes in the jungles of self-doubt.

It got worse when I reached home and realised that the cuteness of the salesgirl probably contributed to my buying the damn keyboard, because it wasn't as nice as the Microsoft Sidewinder X6 and now I'm very sad.

(I actually really wanted a Logitech G11 because it has that cool screen, but nobody was selling it anywhere because it was replaced by the G15/G19 eons ago.)

And also I think I should have gotten the Deathadder instead. I am starting to need extra buttons since I started playing WoW, and also I suspect that weird random 2-hotkey bar in RO was for the extra buttons. FML.

My only consolations are:

1. The Logitech keyboard has its macro record keys labelled G1-G12, versus the Microsoft one which is S1-S12.

So basically I get to stare at my G6 buttons and scream FLY LIKE A G6 LIKE A G6 while my instances are loading.

2. The Sidewinder keyboard is really ugly. Like really really really ugly. And has no USB/headphone jacks. And also no feet to tilt it upwards so it's awkward to type on.

The keyboard settings software is also really ugly and awkward compared to the Logitech one.

I will probably get the X7 or whatever when it comes out, if it addresses the jackless/ugliness issues.

I also noticed that it's almost impossible to draw things freehand, like on Paint or CS, using the Razer mouse. This is most distressing.

The irony is that I'm not actually using my keyboard to type a lot, since I'm stuck in the shop and type posts on the nasty shop keyboard most of the time.

Trying to tear myself away from my PC peripherals and get back to Saturday now, it was Jiamin's birthday barbecue in the evening, so after sneaking my keyboard and mouse into my room and sneaking out again with my bag full of cameras, I headed thereways.

(Actually, I was extremely tempted to go for the Haru fair at Scape with Tenma, but I'd probably have blown my entire salary on a few JSKs.)

(And also I imagined Jiamin's you pangsehed me to go for a cosplay thing?! face, which was very very scary.)

It was extremely satisfying meeting the TKG altos again. (I have this ambivalence towards the MJChoir people, and it's veering toward the cannot-stand-them spectrum at the moment, so all that lost love is being displaced into the TKGS area, what with #TK4lyfe and all.)

Also I had to explain how I ended up with my job about 3 times, and caught up on a bit of gossip (and confirmed some suspicions).

For some time I thought all juniors were stupid and melodramatic and engulfed in their own martyr complexes and completely retarded, thanks to basically the entire 2010 J1 cohort of MJChoir.

Unfortunately after catching up with my cute TKGS juniors I found that they are perfectly sane and canny people. Also the 2011 TKGS J1s are extremely endearing and pwn everyone else.

(QOTD from Marianne, trying to provide an example of how bad moumouren's taste is: "He won't like Sherlyn, because she's too interesting." - Cogito ergo #foreveralone.)

Conclusion: People from other schools are the ones with all the issues. (Refer to Theory of APSFAHSS - not really, any more, because a few problems - but really annoying lingering ones, that refuse to shut up or get a life - come from other people).

My TKGS juniors are so fantastic. Wawww.

Actually, I feel a bit pressured to hold a birthday party for my 19th (my 18th birthday was a joke 2 days before the Chem A level paper, if I remember right), but I'd just collapse from the effort of being social. Jiamin was amazing at it.

Also when I talk a lot I make a legendary number of Freudian epic-falls-off-cliffs, which I promptly cover up by talking some more. I am more or less sure everyone noticed but eh they're nice people I don't care.

After getting home and admiring the clashing colour combi on my keyboard and mouse for about 3.5 seconds, I fell asleep.

Sunday:

I went for the NUS open house with EH.

(a few days ago:)

Sister: If you apply for FASS you should choose your major first so you can do some core modules in the first year and your last few years won't be that panicky.

Dad: What's FASS ah?

Sister: ... Dad, I just graduated from FASS.

Dad: Oh.

Sister: MUM. Dad is so horrible lah he just asked me what FASS is! I graduated from there!

Mum: Oh hahaha. .. So what's FASS?

I thought this was sad until EH told me about her parents, who don't know what FASS is either, only both of them graduated from FASS.

Firstly, balloons. The entire place was covered in balloons. Thanks to this article and others about the coming helium shortage, seeing balloons makes me nervous.

I suppose this means I sort of care about the Earth, so we went to see the Environmental Studies booth.

OH THE HORROR.

Kitty gasps in shock.

Firstly, it wasn't under Design/Environment as I'd expected. It's a cross-faculty course somewhere between FASS and Science.

They emphasized this by plonking the ES booth between FASS and Science, where everyone sort of ignored it except people who accidentally walked in trying to squeeze into the crowds in the Science/FASS booths.

Secondly, it sounds like 4 more years of JC. I took a look at the first year modules, which are basically Bio, Chem, Econs, Maths (calculus and stats) and Engineering (WTF?). After that it gets a bit more fun though, you get a lot of biodiversity things and in the final years you can choose either the geog or bio-based courses.

I am kind of not expecting to get in because they only have an intake of 50 students for the first batch, but I'll write about my IS and everything (leaving out the bits where I basically dissed biodiversity and doomed conservation biologists to joblessness).

I also went to talk to a Philo guy, who has a very nice voice.

(re my question on the syllabus:)

Philo Guy: So we have topics like ethics and then under ethics there's like utilitarian and deontological and stuff.

Random Guy, next to us: What's deontological?

Philo Guy: Like you are duty-bound to do what is good, say your father stole someone's money and you..

Random Guy: So deontological is under existentialism?

Philo Guy: Actually, no, existentialism is this whole other thing like..

(15-minute long mini-lecture ensues)

Yeah it's 4 more years of KI and people looking at you weirdly and asking if the sky is blue and the chair exists. I should have worn the KI shirt.

Erickson did. We ambushed him halfway after he was done looking at his Maths/Physics/Philo courses.

Damn, I had a sudden spike of excitement thinking I get to be Erickson's (and possibly the other KI guys, if they take it) Philo classmates again if I do it, then I realised they're all in NS for ever and ever and ever.

(small voice: and also probably don't want to take Philo any more, other than Erickson, because I pwned them all. nyeh nyeh.)

It took me about 1.5 years to be unscared of my classmate enough to actually contribute in KI class, so I'm predicting Philo in uni will be hell for me.

I also went to check out the Computing booth and am probably going to put the computer science or e-commerce ones to fill up the 8 choices, even though I have a really sad opinion of NUS Computing.

I don't want to take architecture.

Me: So I heard archi is really horrible and stressful and you have to sleep over in the studio like every single day and you won't see your family for 4 weeks at a shot?

Archi Guy: YUP. :D

Me: ...

Archi Guy: Yeah but it's fuuuun lah. (to Archi Guy #2) Hey, this girl just asked me if archi is horrible and stressful and you have to sleep over in the studio like every single day and you won't see your family for 4 weeks at a shot.

Archi Guy #2: Uh.. nnnnoooo?

Archi Guy: HAHA BULLSHIT LAH. But it's fun!

Archi Guy #2: Yeah it's FUN!

Me: Okay are you two like high on UHU glue or something.

Archi Guy #2: No.. Actually UHU glue isn't that bad, it's the yellow glue that's horrible.

Archi Guy: So where did you hear all this stuff about archi?

Me: Oh, my brother just graduated from archi.

Archi Guy: Ohhh then you should know everything from him what. Did he ever bring you to the studio to see?

Me: What? No?

Archi Guy: Not ever??

Me: Nope.

Archi Guy: Awww he's such a nice brother. If I had a little sister I'd bring her to my studio!

Me: .. What? Nice? Why?

Archi Guy: Because then she can help me do my models!

Me: .... Yeah he brought them home and I had to help.

I'm kind of not very sure how they were trying to impress on me that archi is fun, but uh, okay. I have lots and lots of archi horror stories to tell, really.

I also found that lectures still have a soporific effect on me despite not having had one for almost half a year, because the moment I stepped into the Science/FASS talks in the hall I was falling asleep. Or maybe it was the exertion of being social.

I was trying to escape home to die quietly, then Christy made it extremely convenient to meet up for dinner so we went to KFC at Paya Lebar. Yay I missed her a lot too! It's kind of funny how I can meet my schoolmates after years and talk like we were just in school together yesterday.

I hope we're going to be in school together tomorrow. I really want people I actually know to be in my uni course, wherever I end up, I cannot handle the horror of being the only one who knows nobody, like choir all over again.

MJ choir was so bad (the only person I knew was Andik, whom I have approximately never spoken to in my life) that when I discovered there was this random guy named Linus from KI in choir, I ran into class screaming (very calmly) WHO'S LINUS WHO'S LINUS and proceeded to be told 'the guy with the white specs' and thought it was that guy who dropped out after 2 weeks for the next half a year.

And also I was very confused because by the time I found out who Linus was, he wasn't even in choir any more.

If I have to go through that again I might shrivel up and die.

It occurs to me that a lot of my awful stories involve Linus.

I just got back from lunch and the Fujifilm shop downstairs is amazing, they processed my film in about 3 hours! (I sent it in at 11 this morning and it's 2 now.) So this post won't be entirely barren.

I don't have photos of the keyboard and stuff though, will probably pop them in later.

2011-03-11T18:20:00.004+08:00

(from xkcd)

I applied for a debit card, because I'm sick of not being able to pay for my own Steam games/eBay purchases.

Also this will hopefully make me spend less since I can stop buying things through other people and then forgetting to pay them back and thinking I have a lot of money.

I wish people would stop using the word 'horrid'. Will go find the book in question (probably Hogfather) and scan in the passage to explain, later.

Arthas: Father ... is it over?

King Menethil: No, my son, there's a new Raid group next Wednesday.

Heheheh WoW players are funny.

i heard your suitcase say goodbye

2011-03-11T13:46:00.006+08:00

Today has been an extremely horrible day.

1.
I woke up and my left arm was aching for no reason and my left eye was swollen and hurt a lot and I had a bleeding nose. And also I'd kept waking up the whole night trying to massage my arm/scratch my leg which was also bleeding because it was so itchy that I sleep-scratched it to death.

Apparently though this was not easily solved by, say, a ghost mosquito attacking me and resulting in sleep-punching my own face, because all the above problems were entirely unrelated (my eye had a sty in it, my arm was 'growing' according to my mum, my nose was thanks to eating horrible junk food the whole week and the leg I have no idea still).

2.
I also woke up to the sound of my Nokia phone ringing (and had to answer it while bleeding/itching/hurting all over) and ended up coming to work late thanks to collecting my F55 from the Nikon Service Center.

They were probably kidding when they said 1-2 weeks, unless I heard them wrong, because it took all of 3 days (I sent it in on the 8th, and they'd tried to call me on the 10th already to come pick it up) to finish the repairs.

The autofocus is magical. Sadly though, I discovered that the AF assist light now turns on by itseld and refuses to go off again. Also it's shit at focusing in low-contrast.

I loaded a roll of 35mm Kodak ISO 400 BW film and am trying to find things to actually shoot in monochrome.

Also the Nikon people wounded my ego telling me that my handgrip needs to be replaced because it's sticky and gross (it is, and I think it's gross too, but hey shut up you're the ones who made a camera with a wonky AF motor) so I'm OCDishly scraping the weird sticky coating off now.

It was totally not my fault, I only got this camera on saturday and the seller gave it to me all sticky (and also his one week personal warranty was a lie since he absolved himself of all responsibility over the AF motor issue, but at least I didn't have to threaten him since it was free).

I've concluded that photography is 50% shamelessness and 49% luck. The other 1% is probably not getting distracted buying lots of cameras, which unfortunately I am failing at.

My eye hurts. ;_;

3.
I got to work and forgot a lot of stuff and now I have a huge pile of shredded invoices next to me. And also I caused traffic congestion along the lane next to Mac's because I had to run back and forth trying to pass my boss the invoices. Whups.

And I'm damn hungry and haven't had lunch yet omg ;_; Ze nomz, zey elewdz meh.

i like staplers. but not in -that- way.

2011-03-10T18:49:00.002+08:00

I got my new celebratory stapler today. It's a MAX HD-10FS in white.

I'm kind of sad because the flat-clinch staplers feel weird when you staple stuff (there's an extra step so it goes klack-kaSPLOTclik when you staple things, unlike normal staplers which go klack-kaSPLUNK).

Depending on the thickness of my uni notes, I might get one of those really huge staplers which use No. 11 staples. I want a yellow one.

VOCAB TIME:

Stapler = the thing you staple stuff with. NOT a verb.

Staple = Verb ("can you ~ this for me") or noun (my stapler is out of ~s) - not 'stapler bullets'.

Explanation: There is something called a 'staple gun'. This is because it shoots staples.

It's not a 'stapler gun' (no matter whether the people who make staple guns mislabel their own goods). It does not shoot 'stapler bullets'*.

Calling the things that come out of your stapler 'bullets' does not make you any cooler. Also if you coat them with silver and shoot werewolves with them, they will not die, you'll just kill the e. coli on their skin and possibly poison them a bit, depending on which blood vessels you hit.

In Maha Bodhi, because my class is awesome, two of my classmates (who are normally very sane people who fight to get 97/100 for maths) managed to conincidentally staple their hands at the same time, resulting in some blood and disturbed teachers.

This was not as bad as the time when my classmate got stabbed in the eye accidentally with a pencil, and my form teacher drew a very graphic diagram of a cornea which got split into 3 parts to explain why the poor guy wasn't in school, and I think we're all mentally scarred to this day.

It was also not as bad as the time my classmates were playing some dumb game and slammed one guy's hand in the door.

Or the time my other classmate ran into someone and started bleeding from the eye.

Or the other time my classmate ran into the step next to the big pavilion with the Buddha statue in it during PE and broke his leg and fingers and god knows what else.

Or the time my other other classmate pushed someone into the koi pond.

(I can sort of imagine if one of my classmates did this it would probably have a lot of me in it, as in 'I remember the time this girl pulled my hair until my teacher made her move to the back of the class'**.

Or 'the time when a girl was daydreamwalking and walked into a gate and lost practically 1/3 of her blood from the nose'.

Or 'the time when some girl got paint on her PE shirt and retardedly covered the entire patch up with liquid paper and then went to the GO and convinced the receptionist that her stomach pain because the receptionist doesn't believe primary 1 kids have decent enough grammar to construct proper sentences like 'there's PAINT on my uniform which seeped through and now my stomach has it too and it's cold'.)

*If you are in a situation where nobody understands that 'stapler bullets' is bad English, just say 'help me refill my stapler' or something, to avoid using bad English yourself.

(Yes this is how I survived MJC without my internal grammar nazi exploding and gunning everyone down.)

*In my defence, I kept getting poked in the ribs in primary school by lots of people including said classmate. Like nonstop. And when I was giggling hysterically the teachers thought I was insane and hyperactive and ADD.

i don't want to buy a passport cover

2011-03-10T12:24:00.002+08:00

Bow down to me cause I'm from Singapore.

I don't really get why people buy passport covers. They make things troublesome when you have to scan your passport.

Oh my god I realised that uni is about to be scary because everyone is under very strange impressions about what courses I want to study.

1. My dad is sort of nudging me to do Psych. As in 'why don't you do Psych?' which is basically Dadglish for 'I thought you wanted to do Psych, it sounds so fun and interesting, daughter ;___;', because my dad usually doesn't tell me what to do.

I don't really want to, because I highly doubt everything they teach you, but okay if I end up doing Psych at least I sound cool.

2. My mum wants me to do Environmental Studies. She even cut out the newspaper article from last year to show me.

I don't mind since deep in the un-KI-corrupted recesses of my brain I kind of still want to use a green pen all the time and draw vines on the borders of all my essays etc. I will most likely end up in this course because I have no idea what it is and therefore it should be fun.

Unfortunately this is very very ironic and they might kick me out the moment they discover I wrote a 3000 word study on why we should let endangered animals die and voted against my groupmates' Dugong/Eagle-saving PW PIs in favour of teaching people how to swear in dialect.

Also I have been wasting a lot of paper in the shop by printing out the wrong receipts and stuff and doodling everywhere. :(

3. I like Philo. Four years of associating with lifegeeks crazy enough to take Philo actually sounds appealing. I had the following conversation:

Christy: Eh why not Philo it sounds interesting.

Me: My sister says everyone in Philo is weird and insane. ... Oh, wait, we'd fit right in.

Christy: Yeaaaah.

According to my sister, Philo people are very very weird, and Socio/CNM people had no idea what they wanted to do. This coming from someone who does geog which is, hello, barely an arts subject.

Sadly, valid point she made is that you basically cannot get a job with Philo/Socio/Psych majors, which is kind of true (how many philosophers/sociologists/psychos does one country need?).

4. Weird courses like Biomed also appeal to me but I've basically given up all hope of doing anything too science. It's fascinating but I don't have the drive at all.

So I am most likely applying for ES but have to go for the open house this weekend to check it out. If anyone else wants to tag along (I'm going with EH on sunday), feel free.

Yesterday I crashed asleep from flu and now my nose feels funny. Also I sent a lot of messages I don't remember sending including a 'nUuuumnbomnomnom' to Linus (?!?!?) and a lot of whining about getting Portal 2 (which nobody wants to play I DON'T UNDERSTAND WHY).

EH sent me a very disturbing SMS about Mr KI which I didn't read until this morning when my phone deflatbatteried.

EH: Wee LT used the phrases "extremely brilliant" and "very confused" in the same sentence to describe you. -.-

Me: What? What did he say -_- Let me guess.. Sherlyn is extremely brilliant at being very confused.

EH: Wee LT said "Sherlyn can be very confused, but she has her moments when she's extremely brilliant". Don't worry, its a compliment -.-

I noted two things.

Firstly, absence of Erickson is making us spam -_- faces because it feels unnatural not to have anyone -_-ing at us.

Secondly, EH has this insane ability to condense everything into the most essentially panic-inducing message that is possible to be distilled from anyone's casual conversation.

I feel extremely confused. I'm going for lunch.

2011-03-09T14:17:00.005+08:00

I'm dying to flu in the shop right now so this post will be terse and monochrome. Collected my F55 roll this morning, it's good.

I got the film processed and scanned to CD at the Fujifilm shop on the ground floor of Bras Basah Complex, they did it overnight for $9. I'm very unused to film being processed so fast, Triple D takes 3 days.

(I went down during lunch and asked when I could collect the CD and the lady told me the next day. She then proceeded to take my stunned face as a 'why so long?!' kind of expression and asked very concernedly if I needed it by that day, so I presume you can probably drop it off in the morning and collect it at night.)

Photos aren't very interesting though because I didn't go anywhere much. And also I'm too lazy/mentally incapable of figuring out how to rotate the non-horizontal ones at the moment.

I love the colours of this film roll, think it's Kodak somethingorother ISO 400. Everything drifts off to a very green/yellow place.

Having to manual focus was not that bad, only my photos are a bit wobbly, especially the night ones, because with the DSLR I tend to shoot a few until I get lucky and end up with an unwobbly shot. And also it's so light that it's a bit unstable.

I took most of the photos on A/S modes because all the others had annoying flash (there's no flashless-auto mode) and M mode is terrifying when you can't see what you're shooting.

Shit, I just used the last tissue in the shop.

I sent the F55 to the Nikon Service Center yesterday morning before work. It's at the Fuji Xerox building, which happens to be opposite where I worked in Dec.

It took quite a while for the technician to have a look and suggest that I change my rubber grip because it's all sticky and weird (which made me sad), so I was late for work. At least they had one of those nice machines that dispense hot chocolate and stuff.

I just fell asleep twice typing this because my flu is extremely crippling. And also my ban mian that was supposed to be lunch looks inedible.

Plus while massaging my face randomly in a flu-induced stupor I managed to poke my eyeballs out of shape so everything went sort of blurry but it's okay now.

I tried to buy a stapler during lunch to celebrate my discovery that unis actually count KI as a H2 and so my score works out to something which can actually get me into a pretty decent course.

Staplers make me happy. And there was chocolate on sale at Popular which made me even more happy, if a bit confused, but the queue was too long so I'm back to sitting here being sad. I should probably write my personal statements now but my brain is goop.

Like that. The dude from outside who is being very suspicious had jolly well better not disturb me today because I am running low on tact and will most likely scream AAAAGOAWAY at him. Whups.

Sophie, I think this gentleman is a prince.

2011-03-08T00:08:00.005+08:00

Giant backlog of doom.

Firstly, I got a new desktop!

I think the case is the coolest shit ever, it has a giant transparent window in the side so I can ogle at all the wires and parts and shit that I didn't choose.

Yes, this computer was the devil child born of the combined efforts of Daniel, Tenma, Ash, Chunyong (a bit - because he was the only idiot awake at 10am on a saturday to tell me if I needed a sound card) and the guy at the computer shop (Kris).

I had basically no say in it at all. I have no idea what all this computer stuff is/does/needs. All I know is that it cost 1.4k and is fucking awesome.

This is what my desk looks like now. I know it is a total mess. My laptop is on the right under the pile of speaker/wires/gachapon ball.

I'll clear all this up when I get the speaker working (I can't find a way to add it to the power outlet at the moment without everything exploding).

For the sake of stopping computer people from repeatedly asking me what's actually in my computer, I shall list the main parts here where everyone can refer to and scold me for buying them:

1. Intel i5-650 3.20 GH2 CPU
2. Gigabyte P55-UD3L Motherboard
3. Corsair 4GB Kit PC1600 XMS (2GBx2)
4. Western Digital 2TB SATA Harddisk (Green)
5. MSI N560GTX 1GB PCI E
6. Seasonic M12II 620w Power Supply
7. Cooler Master 310 Case

In case anyone was in any doubt, yes I got scolded over the choice of harddisk/processor already, so you guys can just go ahead and cover all the rest. -_-

This is Erickson looking -.- after we gave him his birthday present, which was an Archbishop Nendroid figurine (there is a very long and awful backstory and basically it's all Erickson's own fault, trust me on this). It's so cuuute.

And finally, the Folkiehaul:

Folkie just went to/got back from Japan and bought me a ton of stuff: Kapibara-san pouch/Band-Aids/earphones, a kanzashi hairclip and a (bloody expensive) hairstick (which I have to pay for).

This is the hairstick. It's the most adorable thing ever. It goes dingdingding when I turn my head.

I dressed up in a yukata and everything to take this photo. Only it's very hard to zipai when you're melting to death and look like shit, so everyone has to make do with this devastatingly ravishing view of the back of my head.

Okay that's about it.

I came across this on tumblr and it reminded me of a post I wrote a while back:
Firstly, yes they are, yes they are, yes they are, yes they are. I know guys who'd do this.

Wait, in fact, I have complete faith that every single one of my guy friends is capable of (if they haven't already done these) doing them.

Come to think of it, most of my friends (and hopefully I) do this for their friends (and me) on a fairly regular basis, so why would you not expect your guy to do it for you?!

I'd do it if I were a guy. In fact, I'd do it now if I had a boyfriend**, mainly because I have a lot of time on my hands now school is over til August.

I'd change it to: if you are setting such high fucking expectations you'd better be prepared to appear at your guy's house at 4am to play video games with him and fight to text him first and not laugh at his hair when he goes into NS (this is very hard).

Because if nobody set higher expectations the world would be a bloody sad place full of people who never scream down hallways that they love each other etc etc.

LOW EXPECTATIONS MAKE FOR SAD PEOPLE. Just saying.

*Tumblr is evil.

**Whoa omg when did this post appear?!

If you are one of my regular blogstalkers you will be slightly perturbed that you did not see this post. Actually, it was under drafts before I saw this quote. It just appeared about half an hour ago.

Don't be sad dears you are very good stalkers indeed.

you were my dream

2011-03-07T18:38:00.015+08:00

The biggest difference I noticed using a film SLR is doing a lot of breathing.

With a DSLR you can just spam photos and look at them right after, but my film SLR makes me take very slow breaths in and out for 15 seconds before every photo, just because I am trying not to jump when I release the shutter.

It's very very strange using film, because you are basically waiting for the peak of beauty and not getting to see it at all until weeks later when you develop the film, since the mirror flips up and you are blind, mentally twiddling thumbs or crossing fingers while your moment is captured.

So I recently got a Nikon F55 from some suspect Clubsnap dude. When I went to pick it up I was thoroughly suspicious because 1. the box was really battered, 2. it didn't come with a manual (I downloaded one, but still) and 3. he didn't bring batteries.

Sure enough, when I rushed to the Kodak shop in Hougang Mall to get batteries and some film for my new baby, I discovered that the autofocus didn't work.

Yes, before you ask, I flipped the stupid AF/M switch already. And no, it's not the lens, I tried it with my D90/the F55 with my 50mm and 18-105mm and it's a F55 body problem.

Very sad, I tried going to Camera Hospital on sunday but it was closed for no reason.

Today I plucked up the guts to SMS the damn dude who sold me the camera and, since I am female, he asked if I flipped the AF/M switch. Thank you.

Then I had the sense to Google for Nikon Service Centers* and discovered that it's a F55 model problem which they will repair for free, so I am happy and have to trip down to Tanjong Pagar at 9am tomorrow to go to the Xerox Building to have it fixed.

Meanwhile I am taking lots of photos in the shop on manual focus.

It's not very fun, my viewfinder is at least decently big but there are too many damn things to remember (and to this day I have not figured out how to change the aperture in M mode because there is only one scroll wheel while my D90 has two, and I'm too lazy to check the manual).

(Oh, wait, I just figured it out, only now I'm wondering how you increase the exposure whateveryoucallit +/- thing that I never use. I figure you're supposed to change the aperture and shutter speed and increase it yourself, which is very sad.)

I need to finish this roll of film by tomorrow, because I am pretty sure the Nikon service people are going to rip my film out to change the AF motor.

I found this whole backlog of photos I took in the shop with my compact cameras.

Did anyone else hope this said History of Magic? ;_;

These are the 7 huge boxes I cleared last week out of boredom. It was pretty fun.

Using the SLR is damn shiok.

This is mainly because I have been using utter shit like my modded Holga (her name is officially Hellga, and not in the very-cool-buff-awesome-woman way, in the I-hate-you-and-will-make-your-life-miserable way).

When you have been using pieceofshit excuses for film cameras for the past two years, the film SLR is magical. It's like a DSLR, only with film. This may sound utterly duh but if you have used crap film cameras you will know what I'm talking about - you don't expect shooting film to be this easy.

And, please, if I'd got my Holga new it'd have been more expensive than this F55.

Look at my gorgeous babycamera.

It is completely and ineffably beyond me why anyone would ever buy a Holga unless they made an uninformed impulse decision like me, and it was cheap (I got my CFN for $55, they go new for about $120).

Do not buy a Holga, is what I'm saying. You can cross-process and vignette perfectly well with your F55 (even my $20 pink pano, which has no functions other than Take Photo, is better than the fucking Holga). If you are that retarded you can even crop your photos into squares to make them cuter.

Okay, granted, it doesn't have sprocket holes, but I am pretty sure I can sand the sides off my F55 frame to expose them, and that this will take less time/effort/trauma than modding the Holga (and having to respool the fucking 35mm film in pitch darkness without touching any part with actual photos on it, for the rest of your life).

I hate Holgas.

Die Holga die.

Let me make a list.

1. No sane way to respool the goddamn film.

(I used a hairclip stuck into my film canister and 15 minutes of mindless twiddling, sitting under my blanket with the lights off and sweating like a pig).

2. Have to guess at the bloody focus which basically says one person, three people, lots of people and mountain.

Clearly the people who made Holgas are racists, because what about midgets and premature babies? Okay I highly doubt they are actual races but you get my point.

3. Bloody expensive for a lump of plastic.

As mentioned above, I got my film SLR for less than a brand new Holga. It has (theoretical, at this point of time) autofocus, metering, auto settings for A/S and basically a shitload of wonderful settings and stuff which pwn the Holga. And it respools its own film.

.. Even $8 disposable Kodak cameras respool their own film.

I'm very disturbed by this, as you can see.

4. Uses bloody expensive film.

120 film is ridiculous. Why would you waste good film on a shit camera?

5. If you are that desperate just get a Holga lens and mount it on your DSLR.

Though it's totally beyond me why you'd do that, since you can get better photos with a magnifying glass masking taped to your camera body.

6. The main reason I got a Holga was for the sprocket holes.

And honestly you can't see a thing because most film companies print random crap where the sprocket holes are and it looks very uncool.

I won't even tell you which shops process sprocket holes because I don't want you to get a Holga.

7. Just don't get a Holga.

8. I will groan and whine at you every time I see you if you do.

9. This is not even an issue of me taking lousy photos, because my lousy photos are even lousier with the Holga.

(The shit all over the back and top is for counting the number of clicks per frame.)

I realised that nobody is appropriately impressed with the horror of Holgas because I haven't actually blogged about my Holga frightfest which happened after I modded it to fit 35mm, so here it is in bloody graphic detail for the first time:

I used bits of sponge for my fish tank filter to hold the 35mm film in place, which was a cinch. Don't buy those stupid $30 adapters, they are rather pointless.

About 1/4 way through a roll of film, I realised that the batteries in my Holga were flat, because the stupid flash continues charging itself perpetually if you forget to turn it off (which obviously I did).

So I had to put in new batteries, because shooting on a Holga is infinitely more fun when you get to listen to the bwweeeeeEEEEE sound of the flash charging.

Due to the ridiculous structure of the Holga which has way too much empty space in it, the batteries are located between the film and the shutter, i.e. I have to take out the film somehow in order to change them, then put it back and pray the frames didn't overlap in the process.

It so happened that that day, my house had one of its sporadic termite attacks.

So I was huddled under my blanket trying not to let my film get destroyed, fiddling with the film and shit by touch, and feeling the sweat trickle down my chest.

And then it suddenly occurred to me that sweat should trickle down instead of up and there was a fucking termite on my boob.

To my intense horror, I do not have normal reactions. Instead of jumping up and screaming hysterically and running out of my room tearing my clothes off like normal (slightly insane) females do, I calmly finished changing the batteries and ignored the weird crawly feeling on me.

I very blithely fixed the back on the camera, flipped the locks at the side up, switched on the light and then tore all my clothes off and jumped around screaming.

Because film is expensive, you know, and hysterics should not cost you actual money.

Needless to say I am mentally scarred by Holgas and hate them forever.

Back to topic:

I also bought a Nikon FE+50mm lens, which is floating somewhere on eBay while I wait for the seller to quote me shipping. I am pretty sure it doesn't autofocus (it uses batteries smaller than the ones in my GC, and my GC damn well doesn't autofocus**) but it is gorgeous and I love it.

Okay I need to scoot off and write another post about all the backlogged photos now.

*Uh, actually, no I didn't. I Googled 'Nikon F55 autofocus repair'. Shush.

**In fact, the Nikon FE uses batteries smaller than my scientific calculator from secondary school, which doesn't autofocus either! :D

The Holga uses the same batteries as the GC. Unfortunately, if you forget to turn off the flash (like me, because the camera is too retarded to turn it off by itself which I did not see coming), it will consume batteries at a ridiculous rate, and you can only put in new ones when you change the film.

So basically you get one very well-exposed pretty photo in a cool flash colour, and then about 20 shitty dark photos.

Don't lie you know you'd forget to turn the flash off too. ;_;

2011-03-06T23:06:00.000+08:00

OMG MAMESHIBA.

and by himself it's easy to pretend he'll never love again

2011-03-06T22:28:00.003+08:00

Man I'm quite glad I don't have a tumblr because half my reblogs would be from manga. >_>

i am not in love with my a level cert.

2011-03-04T23:36:00.002+08:00

Eh I'm very confused over whether to be sad or not because I wasn't sad and then I realised people expect me to be sad so I was sad and then I wasn't really sad so I went back to being notsad and then I realised I'm totally and ineffably screwed then I was sad.

So now I'm sad. Ahhh.

i am not in love with my a level cert.

2011-03-04T22:16:00.004+08:00

I think I'd make a really good boyfriend. Seriously.

I'd tell my girlfriend she's fantastic every day and always return calls and wake up at 2am to read to her and buy her presents and random food and bring her nice places and steal her books to write cute stuff on postits for her.

Hi look I already do all of the above for my friends on a more or less regular basis so it wouldn't be that hard to extend it to some girl I am madly in love with right.

I'd also go find more synonyms for gorgeous/nice presents/food/places for her, and dress nicely when we go out, and have a photo of her in my wallet to show off to all my loser single friends and stuff.

Unfortunately I've realised that trying to appear to be a very good potential boyfriend is not working because I'm a girl. Chasing guys is basically equivalent to utter desperation in females. If I brought him food and went to see him every day I'd be a fucking stalker, not a good girlfriend.

According to every single piece of literature I can find, being a good girlfriend involves looking pretty and nua-ing around and cooking and saying a lot of cliche things, none of which I can do (without wanting to claw my own eyes out).

Or maybe I'm just going about this wrong, because every time I have tried to give in to my urge to use the I'dMakeAGoodBoyfriend tactic I end up reverting to I'dMakeAGoodGirlfriend and nua-ing out halfway.

It is very very hard for me to put a lot of effort into something:

If you just went on msn and said hey you free this weekend for movie? and the guy says no, you don't feel as horrible because you can convince yourself he's probably really not free.

If you practice for three weeks and appear at his void deck (or, okay, outside his bungalow because I have higher standards) and buy a guitar and turn your amp up really really loud so he can hear you serenading him with stupid Bruno Mars songs, and he still says no, your life is basically over.

And so far being safe has worked very well.

Maybe it's because I have nothing to fall back on. If I'd gotten straight As for A levels I'd have asked him out with the theatrics and the full version of half-assing (I am pretty sure it's not called full-assing.) and if he'd still rejected me I'd have my straight As to celebrate anyway.

But I didn't, I am not sure I can even get into uni, and if I asked him out now, even if he said yes I'd have to live with the suspicion that he were doing it out of pity.

(Then again that'd make a really weird tactic. "Oh goddd I failed my A levels I'm miserable as fuck will you be my boyfriend?")

Help.

2011-03-04T21:43:00.002+08:00

Okay everyone better start doing things like this because the reality that I might not be able to get into uni is not hitting me yet and I'm not sure when it's going to crash down on me but someone had better be there to stop me from jumping off a building or something.

2011-03-04T17:21:00.000+08:00

analysis: I'm sad about my bio, was hoping for A/at least B. The rest were bleh expected and thank goodness for KI/lit or I'd be a depressed retaking puddle right now. Hopefully I can still get into some cock course at NUS.

2011-03-03T13:49:00.001+08:00

DISCLAIMER: The blobs of dessicated brown furry things aren't the corpses of drowned hamsters, just the remains of my marimo moss ball. His name was Quigley.

twentyfive minutes too late

2011-03-03T01:04:00.004+08:00

I'm getting very scared of Facebook. I think it can read my mind.

Today I saw this lady on the way to work wearing Christian Louboutins. I stared at the red soles all the way from the MRT to the shop.

After lunch the same pair of shoes came in and I realised she's actually the wife of mildly-famous-music-dude (if I have heard of him he is pretty famous since I'm a music scene retard). She was quite interested in the piano.

I hope she buys it. I got quite upset, though, that they won't send in another piano and there will be a blank space in the shop.

My boss tried to convince me that it's a happy space but I am not buying it.

I won't have anything to hide behind when customers are talking to the bosses! No random piano-playing people will come in just to play music on it! It's my friend! :(

Anyway, back to topic.

I went on Facebook when I got home and realised that there's ads for Christian Louboutin heels all along the sidebar. I am rather terrified now because I didn't mention Louboutins anywhere on Facebook (or even post anything there today that I remember).

Also, today when the phone rang, I answered: 'Hi, Facebook!'

I am so multitasking-disabled that I am starting to think I'm a guy.

Not to mention I left the shop about 15 minutes late because I was too engrossed in making a list of Starcraft novels I am tracking across Singapore (the curse of Jurong Regional Library strikes again!).

I've decided that Ke$ha needs to act as Kerrigan if they ever make a Starcraft live-action movie. If they did up her weird forehead freckles a bit, she'd look exactly like what I'd imagine Kerrigan'd look like.

List of books I want:

Uprising
Liberty's Crusade (marine parade) or Starcraft Archive (tampines English STA)
Queen of Blades (jurong regional _|_)
Dark Templar Saga (1: tampines, 2: tampines, 3: marine parade/tampines, English GOL)
Frontline (1-4 who knows where they are dude)

(Heard the graphic novels are pretty lousy, actually, but wouldn't mind reading them.)

Poor Raynor. I think he doesn't really love Kerrigan but the novels sort of had to have a love story somewhere so he got the lousy. He should have eloped with Studio Ghibli to write a happy platonic love ending for himself.

mad woman bad woman that's just what you are

2011-03-03T00:26:00.005+08:00

Finally got industrious and got photos. :D

I got home and my dad finally got me a power outlet timer so I don't have to switch the fish tank light on and off. It's quite magical, you push down a little slice of the timer and it just goes by itself.

When I have my own house I'll put this on EVERYTHING so I don't have to switch them on.

Went over to wifey's house to pick up my nail polish. I got OPI Black Onyx and Seche Vite Topcoat. So basically my nail polish consists of white, black, black with gold flakes, black, neon yellow (the camera can't get the neonness properly!) and black. >_>

This is my severely OPI'd right hand which looks really fat here. From the pinky up, it has white with black shatter, black, silver with pink/green sheen, blue shimmer and goo green

This is my left hand. From the thumb up, it has pink glitter, pink glitter, pink shimmer, purple and red shimmer. I love my descriptive skills.

Really sleepy. I slotted some fish photos into the previous post but for some reason I can't find the S90 so more interesting photos shan't be up until I do.

Tomorrow is thursday! I AM GOING TO WAKE UP SUPER EARLY AND BORROW MY DAD'S CREDIT CARD SO I CAN GET MY DESKTOP! BOOYAH.

I am not thinking about friday at all. At all.

At all.

or is it this dancing juice

2011-03-01T14:48:00.001+08:00

Gave up trying to put photos in this. Walloftext is retro.

Sunday I woke at 12 to the sound of a very stoned Linus asking me out for lunch.

What happened (according to Linus), abridged version:

Linus' Brain: Ogods I am so tired I want to crawl into my bed and die myself to death.

Rest of Linus: (calls me) Hi Sherlyn wanna go for lunch?

Me: Yeah okay*.

Linus' Brain: Oh shit I'm too tired I need to call Sherlyn back and cancel and sleep until dinnertime if not I'll just lose all brain function now

Rest of Linus: (calls EH) Hi EH wanna go for lunch?

EH: Yeah okay.

Linus' Brain: Argh okay we can flop back to my place and watch BBT and vegetate after.

Me: Movie movie.

Rest of Linus: Movie movie!

EH: Movie movie.

(an hour later) Linus: YOU ARE SO SLOW.

We ended up having steak (medium rare is disgustingly squidgy and bloody by the way) and watching I Am Number Four. I am not entirely sure whether it was a good movie or not because I spent the last half an hour needing to pee and being on the verge of biting Linus because it seemed like it'd help.

Also the female lead was the most pathetic whiny act-indie poser piece of shit I have ever seen. Who dyes their hair blonde and then claims to like their shitty Canon because it has light leaks? Her only redeeming feature is wearing nice clothes. Number Six was way cooler than her (and had the most adorable accent which is probably Australian**).

Number Four was a lousy angsty lovelorn fag, by the way.

EH and I navigated to Serangoon North all on our own to stare soulfully at fish, because Ricky (my two year old Black Ghost Knife) is extremely lonely in his tank. The fish shops there weren't very interesting, so we went to the chinchilla shop instead.

I WANT A CHINCHILLA. I'd name it Ryan and train it to sit on my shoulder and everything and respond to HI BABY CHINNN. THEY ARE SO DARLING. And also retardedly expensive.

I then dragged EH to Clementi to buy fish with me. I ended up with 26 fish.

20 Neon Tetras
4 Miniature Puffers
2 random suckerfish

I'd have preferred Figure 8 puffers because mini puffers are just depressingly tiny after a while, but they weren't in season or something. The last time I got a figure 8 puffer it flopped over and died almost immediately.

I also bought a lot of plants but the choices weren't very good this time (the best plant shop at Clementi was closed), so my tank still looks a bit strange.

I'm spamming the tank with ridiculous amounts of fertilizer in the hope that they'll grow sideways and fill it in, but looks a bit hopeless (the last plants just grew up and got torn to bits by Ricky because he thought they were trying to eat his frozen worms).

So this morning my cute Tetra shoal was darting around being idiotic and everything has more or less stabilized, with the puffers floating around looking confused and Ricky minding his own business under the log in the corner.

Also, the two suckers entirely disappeared. I sincerely hope they are just glued somewhere pretending to be rocks, because it's a very scary thought if Ricky ate them (they are rather large and spiky).

Today work has been rather slow. The only weird going-on is that the guys from outside keep asking for my name and refusing to tell me theirs (and also catching me sleeping). I wish they wore nametags or something.

I thought I'd hide in the shop so they'd stop, but then a customer came in and did it too. I sense a conspiracy.

P.S. My Tetras are really unspeakably weird. This morning two of them were missing and I found their corpses behind the filter. While trying to fish them out (pun not intended) I lost one of them and just now I realised there are still 19 Tetras, i.e. one of them came back to life. What.

*I sound extremely coherent on the phone if you call me and I just woke up, but in actuality I will not remember the entire conversation later and will be very confused if you start screaming.

Thankfully I'd gone to sleep at 9 (and was therefore fairly conscious during the above exchange) due to the trauma of last night:

I got home from lunch with Kimmy and decided to jump around on the sofa singing VERY VERY LOUDLY because nobody was at home and the house was all quiet.

First, I painted all the nails of my left hand white with my new OPI polish stick (it sucks, don't get one).

I then proceeded to get high on the fumes and go online for Bruno Mars lyrics.

At this point there was a really persistent beeping noise coming from my brother's alarm clock because he's a moron who sets it to about 6pm in the afternoon for no apparent reason.

There was also a small weird groan when it started beeping again after I snoozed it once for fun, but I ignored this.

After 3 renditions of Marry You with lousy guitar accompaniment (it only has 3 chords and I was too lazy to improvise), I was about to be late and stomped into the master bedroom (still singing) and to my horror my sister was there.

My voice gets extremely low when I am terrified so I went about 4 octaves down from I know a little chapel on the - WHOAAA.

And then I ran away while my sister screamed STOP THE BEEPING NOISE and flopped around on the bed like some Bioshock aggro (sound-targeting Big Sister with no apparent movement range).

And was promptly stuck shivering in my bed from fear and maluation the whole night (Kimmy called later to cancel dinner/drinks because Wayne's a moron again) to the extreme apathy of everyone else. And ended up sleeping from 9pm to 12pm the next afternoon.

**Gloria and I have more or less finalised travel plans to Thailand (mid-May)/Aus (end-April) and I'm going to Hokkaido (early May) with family so life is a bit exciting and all and I need more film. And also a lot of leave. >_>

OH FUCKYEAH NOW I HAVE AN EXCUSE TO BUY THAT IDIOTIC DORAEMON BATTERY-OPERATED HANDWARMER THING! :D

And more winter wear and shit. I want one of those cute peacoat things that stupid I Am Number Four uncool girl wears, because I cannot carry off leather jackets like Number Six.

ASOS time.

2011-03-01T02:42:00.003+08:00

Oh my god there's a very long post about Sunday in my drafts and it's just getting longer and longer because I haven't the time to upload any photos to fill it in. >_>

I'm so excited about getting my desktop finally. My laptop managed to crash a moment ago because I had 6 Firefox tabs and 2 MS Words and iTunes open at the same time. It said Please Wait.. and then blackscreened. :(

A bit ago I was fuming all over the place because my favourite junior is upset over a stupid choir issue (I thought she was fine but then I realised she hadn't heard and then she exploded all over the place). I was on the verge of kicking people's kidneys in and stabbing them to death but then realised:

If it were me nobody'd be fighting for me at all. If we can tell so easily that (someone else who is also one of my favourite juniors) has a crush on (person whom this shitstorm is burying), I can tell you that about 0 people have a crush on me at the moment and awesome people like favouritejunior do not love me enough to fight for me.

I am very sad.

If they drag me down I will have to kick and scream damn bloody enthusatically because nobody else is going to do it for me.

I will therefore have to fight my own fights and mind my own back and thus am utterly and indelibly screwed because I am a crappy fighter/minder. And it all ends on friday.

Seriously, what else can happen? I retake and tromph off happily one year behind/ahead of everyone I know and spend the rest of my life a miserable loser. I go to a private uni and manage to pay my parents back at the age of 50 and then die from stress because I am terrified of other people. I don't really see any other options.

Friday, please do not come. I want to stay in this week forever where all my idiotic pre-NS guyfriends are miserably asking everyone they know out before they are shoved into camp for the rest of their lives.

Friday makes me wish I'd taken physics so I'd have a slightly better shot at making a time machine and rewinding this week over and over again to keep away from friday.

Hi everyone I'm warning you in advance: Do not ask me what I got for A levels. Just assume I failed horribly and console me, because I won't tell you.

2011-02-28T01:52:00.001+08:00

I typed a very long post then accidentally pressed Reset and double enter while trying to insert a space after my paragraph and am now too grumpy to blog. -_-

cause it's a beautiful night, we're looking for something dumb to do

2011-02-25T15:25:00.003+08:00

I have resolved to go find whoever I happen to be crushing on Feb 14th next year (unless they are already attached) and serenade the shit out of them until they agree to go out with me.

I'm already perfecting my playlist and all that's left to do is some arrangement and practice a lot.

Right now a whole bunch of prepubescent ACSI boys are in the shop geeking on the piano and playing the Twilight song. This is bloody hilarious. And also there's this one guy who's actually quite cute.

I'M A FUCKING PEDOPHILE LAH OH MY GOD -_-

if you ask once i'll tell you twice / i'd ignore the world's advice / if we could be together for a while

2011-02-25T02:20:00.001+08:00

.. but we can't cause you're a fucking oblivious idiotface. :D

2011-02-24T20:35:00.001+08:00

My friends are so sensible it SCARES me.

As he, defeated, dying, / On whose forbidden ear / The distant strains of triumph / Break, agonized and clear.

2011-02-24T13:16:00.000+08:00

Man am I getting useless.

This week has been horrifying. I wake up at 9.30 every day and my veins scream adrenalin because I keep thinking I'm late (the sun being up already has meant, for the past 12 years, that I am late).

Then I go to work and panic a bit and waste some paper and then the boredom sets in and I end up doing utterly useless things like learning to play piano without a piano.

Yesterday I headed to the library before I went home (so far it's been a mass of going out for dinner/waking up just in time for work and I hadn't actually had the chance to go to the library yet).

23rd Feb 11:

Diana Wynne Jones - Howl's Moving Castle
The Selected Poems of Emily Dickinson
Introduction to Aesthetics
Asian Aesthetics

I finished Howl's last night, but it was rather marred by the mental imagery from the Studio Ghibli movie that refused to go away. Howl is a lot cuter in the book, though, and there's strange twists and things that never happened in the movie.

I think Studio Ghibli just hates romance stories. I don't understand why perfectly happyendingable films like Spirited Away and Totoro have to have platonic love parables shoved in your face instead of the happy romantic ending they were building up to the entire time.

But it's a bit strange, because I realised yesterday that happy endings (involving the girl being run off with by some prince or hot guy) are a very western concept. As far as I know, asian stories are usually funny and/or end in everyone dying all over the place.

Also, the main characters are usually guys who end up rich. (Even Madam White Snake. Which was basically the original shonen novel except the guy gets dead too.)

Next week I shall borrow some guitar/piano books*. Assuming I can find them at the bloody library. I think there is an evil plot by people living in the west to borrow all the interesting books and return them all at Jurong fscking Regional Library.

I am going to go for lunch and then come back and try to blog about other people. Whups.

*Yes, I know I work in a music shop. No, I can't bring the books home.

2011-02-22T00:51:00.004+08:00

I am getting damn grouchy.

Me: Eh k wait let me check.

Android OS: I don't like you! /restarts

Me: Ohshit.

i.e. my halfwritten blog posts keep getting disappeared, which everyone should know is annoying to the maddest degree and makes me grumpy enough to write everything in point form.

1. I changed my specs and NOBODY noticed.

2. Omgomg Blackberries are so fun with all the built-in symbols and shit I need to root my phone so it gets cute symbols too (and better battery life and more memory). Today I kept trying to use the nonexistent touch screen on Linus' new BB Bold.

3. We crashed Chunyong's house with $116.20 in sashimi and maki platter. It was mad yummy and I am still burping fishy burps. Only we were all too sleepy after that to appreciate the beauty of watching Ju-On while CY and Linus played Marvel vs Capcom on the other screen.

4. I am really really sleepy. More tomo.

that awkward moment

2011-02-21T03:58:00.004+08:00

Wtfz am I really that angst? >_>

In a fit of premonitory egoism, I dug out my customizable stamp set that I bought in what looks like Primary 5 (there are little star-shaped pieces of paper which are stamped with HAMSTERS FOR SALE in the box) and made a stamp.

It was a really good investment, this stamp set. :D The only thing I am sad about is that the ink pad is disintegrating (it's made of suede) and I might have to get a new one soon.

Today was really amusing because I discovered that I have a penchant for selective remembering.

.. Actually, I did not feel awesome at all today, just really stupid and weird.

Really, really stupid. >_>

Grand Chase is refusing to patch properly, but on the bright side, I have solved the photo uploading issue: changing everything to 25% size in Paint reduces the file size by about 20 times and uploads really really fast, in the tiny windows where my internet is actually working.

Tomo will be busy and full of me scuttling around trying to meet up with Folkie, playing GC, collecting sashimi and crashing various houses. (Assuming I don't vegetate the whole night and end up oversleeping.)

Everyone is changing so fast it's a bit scary (especially the girls, since the boys are just disappearing into a mass of camo-print lives, never to be seen again). The A levels kind of boil you in a pressure cooker and kill every sign of life in you, and then you get dumped out into the streets to grow into something else.

I want to turn into a Mantine. This is because:

1. There are only 4 Water/Flying dual types. (And I want to be able to travel EVERYWHERE so I will learn to fly properly.)

2. One of them is Gyrados and I can't be a Gyrados because they are too cool and I'd rather meet them instead. If I were a Gyrados I couldn't meet other Gyrados because I'd kill the shit out of them.

3. One of them is Lugiah. Ditto Gyrados, except there's only one of me because I'm legendary and I'd never get to meet myself which is depressing.

4. The 3rd one is Wingull/Pelipper. They can't swim. I need to be able to swim so I can see more Water types because they are indescribably cool. (Even though Wingull is damn cute.)

5. This means that I am currently a Mantyke and it looks cute. Like those tuna-filled pillow bits you find in Whiskas cat kibble.

6. I am also not in very high demand and irritating trainers will not chase after me with their stupid balls.

7. I need a Remoraid to evolve into a Mantine because I am speshul. This is clearly a metaphor that I cannot turn into a better person without finding my soulmate and then I will be able to soar above my sordid existence with giant flappy delicious wings.

8. I have a retarded smiley face on my back which tricks people into thinking I am friendly and will let them ride on me holding the two antenna shit things to steer, when actually I am going to bring them out to sea and then drown them.

9. Mantine and Mantyke both have MAN in their names which makes me sound like I use Old Spice. Or am Old Spice. They probably poached my family and ground them up to make Old Spice just because their names made the ingredient list sound more macho.

10. I have a really cute expression.

Hi, if anyone is interested in finding someone who comes up with really elaborate Pokemon metaphors for her life, you have found me. Feel free to be my Remoraid and attach yourself to my armpit for the rest of my life. :|

2011-02-20T22:47:00.004+08:00

OMG I'M TOO TIRED TO BLOG ABOUT GOING OUT ANY MORE I'M SORRY. It's very very tiring being social can.

EH and I crashed Linus' house yesterday and I fell asleep waiting for BBT to load. ;_; I wanna play Grand Chase now. I took leave tmr to crash Chunyong's house (and am quite surprised that I managed to take leave, actually) and am determined to get a bloody sashimi platter over.

(GC is 51% now.)

Ohno ohno I have no idea what's going on agh agh.

and my heart rolls down the freeway

2011-02-19T00:26:00.002+08:00

Thursday: It's quite sad that I get nooby-looking scrapey scars on my knees and random scratches on my wrist that won't go away (and make people think I'm self-mutilating).

(And like more on my thighs where I stupidly scratched myself in primary school, and now I have clawmarks on my chest from the cat.)

Today (after running into Yi Jun for the second time in 24 hours, apparently she and lives and works near me :/ ) I was on the bus to Kembangan and saw this girl who had the most gorgeous scar ever.

I had half a mind to ask her for a photo but I was bloody late for work already, so: it was centered on her collarbone, boomerang shaped, and looked like she got initiated into some elvish cult. With a blood ritual.

There's this guy Carrot (or whatever) related to everyone* somehow who has equally cool pirate-looking scars all over. They even have those stitch things at the edges.

So I stoned there imagining this girl with the beautiful scar swinging through the trees with green eyes and a wild look in them, and as a shamaness all dressed in furs standing at the head of a frozen waterfall, and as a random space cowgirl, and then I missed my stop.

I'm now in the shop waiting for closing time, and finally picked up the nerve to try and learn piano. So I took this nice-looking Piano Course book from the shelf.

On page 7, I encountered a problem.

The piano in the shop looks like this (ignore all the fingerprints which I am by right supposed to clean off but am too terrified that I will plunk the keys down too hard and kill the whole thing):

... Huh. PIANO BOOK Y U LIE TO ME

Now I can't practice piano. :(

No, I am kidding, I was not really going to practice on a bloody $120k piano, it just seems blasphemous.

I went for dinner and chocolate with Kimmy and Gloria after work. The chocolate cafe at Esplanade is good. This was Valentine's chocolate #1.

Kimmy's Suckao (concentrated chocolate heated over a tealight burner and sucked up through a metal spraw - spoon-straw - like a chocolate shot) was high-inducing.

(I am not counting the giant depressed pile of chocolate I bought myself on Tuesday night as Valentine's chocolate, because I had to pay for it myself and I haven't actually eaten any yet, being too traumaed over the non-pretzel cheese pretzels.)

Hadn't seen Kimmy in ages and ages. Her job pwns mine, she is getting paid a lot more than me to sit there and receive/watch cute guys at a swimming school. What.

She has a cute jelly camera. THE LENS CAP IS SO ADORABLE. It looks like some RO headgear.

When I got home my CS5 was there.

Only I realised I can't install it on my laptop because my laptop is too sucky to run it properly and I'll have to wait for my desktop, so I am just sitting around staring happily at the shrinkwrapped box.

Friday:

I suddenly realise that other people pay a lot of attention to the things I say when I have breakfast with Tenma at Bedok KFC and he gives me more chocolate.

This is because I told him I was sad and deprived and nobody gave me chocolate on valentine's, and I'm used to getting loads from classmates and whatever (in the mad Valentine's day chocolate strewing rituals that everyone has partaken in since primary school).

I don't remember saying this at all. >_>

Apparently my friends take my moans very very seriously and I will need to tread carefully because if I say anyone has bullied me they will promptly be assassinated in their sleep or something.

It's Royce Champagne Nama. :D I am highly cheerful and set off for work.

Halfway through the day when I am pigging (pun pun) out on my mixed organ soup:

Voice: Hi.

Boss: Hi!

Voice: Um hi.

Me: (turns around) OH HI.

Voice (which appears to be coming from Eng Hong): HI.

Boss: Hi?

Me: My friend.

Boss: Ohh.

Me: (turns back) Mmm.

Boss: What you're just gonna leave her there?

Me: I'm eating. ;_;

(This is very important, because for the last few days nobody's been around and I've been too terrified of missing customers to go for lunch at proper hours.

Not to mention yesterday when I was the only person minding the shop, some owner of a music school turned up and my boss called me when I was less than 3 meters away from the food court, and I had to go back up and give him his stuff. Byebye food.)

She buys random piano books, disappears, then reappears with more chocolate.

It's Chocolate Research Facility Cookies and Cream. :D

Work is finally out after hours of alternating extreme panic and boredom, and I totally forget that I'm supposed to get another RO client from ZM and wander off to Bugis Mac's for dinner.

And then I suddenly realise that the Royce is in my bag and probably liquefied by now. I frantically unwrap it and eat it (it's magnificent and barely melted thanks to the ice pack).

No, ZM didn't give me any chocolate, he was too busy on his man-date (mandate get it get it).

When I got home my 100-pack of Instax Mini film was here! I LOVE PARCELS.

I then got too distracted by the bubble wrap to actually load the film. (The bubble wrap these Koreans use is the best kind for popping.)

Shleep time.

*Somehow the TJC people and the AGC people know him, which basically makes everyone since I'm too lazy and extraneousness-conscious to list their names.

2011-02-17T13:56:00.002+08:00

I wanna play COD 8. And Monster Hunter. And Bulletstorm.

mjölkmjölkmjölkmjölkmjölk

2011-02-16T14:03:00.004+08:00

Folkie: In akiba now. Bought your sticks. Not as elaborate.. the one you showed me was about 700 bucks

Me: LOL YAY buy me kapibara! How much were sticks?

Folkie: Quite ex... Surprise you when I get back.

Oh joy hairsticks! + Oh shit there goes my pay = Ambivalence defined. >_>

(Folkie pointed out that the last time he saw me was in like sec 2, which is really weird because I never realised it'd been that long.

My RO days are far far behind me in the distant realms of having a working PC.)

The shop has been pretty dead today, which is the way I like it. I'm now spying on angmohs who are in the Gibson room.

(You know those old guys who came in to jam last thursday that I was ranting about? On friday the shop dude from outside came over to tell my boss about them.

Despite being dressed like random slobs, they proceeded to buy the whole set of intruments.

And paid in cash. $16000 in thousand dollar notes.

And when they delivered it to RWS they realised that the Rolls Royce and Bentley outside both belonged to him.

Hey, I could totally have told you he was a big shot from the way he played electric violin. Or at least people like me would have paid him a lot of money to listen.)

My angbao money is getting severely depleted. Thankfully I saw this coming and hid half of it in various places in my room, which I then proceeded to deliberately lose track of, so I am not totally broke.

I can't wait for uni to start so I'll have stuff to actually do. I even feel like mugging. Being surrounded by books every day is bad for me.

(There's this guy who's wearing what appears to be an MJ uniform looking at guitars just outside and I'm trying not to stare at him. I already managed to terrify one potential MJ choir junior by being overenthu at her.)

2011-02-16T01:30:00.002+08:00

Tenma: You'd make a really rabid fangirl.

Me: I am, I read almost all 16000 Rurouni Kenshin fanfics okay. HAHAHAHA.

Tenma: Awesome. Whoever your boyfriend is in the future, he's damn lucky. Cause you won't cheat on him. But you'll murder him if he cheats on you.

Me: Yeah I will.

Tenma: You'll murder him and his mistress. And her family. And her potted plants.

SH: No you'd mope around and drive all of us nuts and THEN we'll kill him.

Me: Ohhhh.

SH: Explain that to Tenma please.

Today I discovered the splendors of Baconsalt. I have this niggling feeling that someone has tried to extol the virtues of baconsalt to me before but can't remember who it was.

And then just as I was making up new, foody lyrics to the tune of Love is a Many Splendored Thing, I opened the packet of Cheddar Cheese/Pretzel Combos and was scandalised.

Why are the pretzels not pretzel shaped?!

My entire good mood was based on the anticipation of eating cheddar-cheese-filled pretzels
which would be a miracle of consumable engineering.

They are just little straight tubes with cheese in them. Like chee cheong fun but made of pretzel and cheese instead of kway teow and pig. And not fun. _|_

I am chomping on them feeling very cheated and envisioning the magic that would have been pretzel-shaped pretzels filled with cheese.

2011-02-16T00:25:00.001+08:00

Work was awesome today because all I did was pricetag stuff and mind the shop and help people find books, while slowly freezing.

Dinner was Sushi Tei with wife/DZ/xiao ling and I'm too tired aagh goodnight.

oh, friend, you left me speechless

2011-02-14T23:33:00.017+08:00

This was supposed to be an inkpost, but I'm too lazy and shivering from hunger to write it all out, so it's just going to be a hybrid post. With really bad misaligned handwritten text.

(I highly doubt anyone other than my wife will be able to tolerate reading about 6k words in my deliciously illegible handwriting, either way.)

I should really have written it before going on Facebook and whatnot, but I didn't because I hadn't thought anything could faze me. I was wrong, though, and need to blog this right now before I lose this feeling and gild it with wit and rhetoric.

I do not really care who reads this and what they say about me because everyone who means anything to me knows the very simple truth behind this post, and everyone who should mean a lot to me will be able to read this in the way it's meant to be read, instead of corrupting it with their own spices.

It's most unfortunate that I have been tricked into strange situations over the last couple of years for Valentine's Day, which have conditioned me into approaching it with trepidation.

When Tenma asked me out on a date for Valentine's, knowing he doesn't actually like me and that it'd be the most awkward, friendship-decimating thing ever, I managed to tell him I wasn't free.

I am sorry I'm not a better friend, but at least this made you confess to the girl you like (who was obviously not me) and you know I have always been/will be here for you, even if I have no idea what to say. We can sit in companionable silence.

Odd and upsetting things happened extensively the week before Valentine's, which is largely why I asked Jason out (I didn't think he would say no - this is to be explained - and that I'd end up doubly grieved and spend the next few days a zombie to depression).

He did agree eventually, but the end doesn't justify the means (I basically abused his lack of assertive powers and shoved him between a rock and a hard place).

The entire week leading up to Valentine's was spent moping and collecting angbao money and sleeping 18 hours a day (you probably did not deduce this from my lack of angsty posts, but trust me, they are in here to protect myself).

On Sunday night, a bout of angst struck again near midnight and I curled up in bed with my phone, frustrated and grieved by the world.

It was bad, even for Twitter standards, and definitely so by my standards.

I refuse, though, to succumb to the urge that I get to finally out myself over this moron whom I have been being severely upset over, so you will have to settle for the others. They have touched me no less vastly.

Completely unexpectedly, Linus tweeted me and it culminated in this:

Linus offered to take me out to dinner on a date if I wanted, and I thought this was why I suddenly decided that he is beautiful, and then I realised that it wasn't. It was the MATHEMATICAL BEAUTY that did it.

I do not know how it is possible that I have a whole breed of friends who are seemingly designed to know exactly what will make me laugh, but they are there somehow - Keedrique being their founder and president and curator - and I think they are why I get up in the mornings.

Linus the Highly Wonderful Boy, I am so sorry I ever underestimated you, but I didn't see this coming at all, because nobody seems to care.

I haven't made a List Of Wonderful People since maybe sec 4, because JC sucks the life out of you, but after the A's everyone is changing like winter has left.

("Spring is pleasant and gentle" is the line of Yver that I do not remember Linus once in two years get to when he sings it, but it is still there in the song and I have reached it after all.)

Hi, friends all, I love you.

I sleep more or less dreamlessly and shoot awake at 9.30 when my alarm rings, and read the SMSes I got while asleep (there are lots, because before drifting off I SMSed whoever I could half-asleep to wish them a happy Valentine's).

By the time I finish my standard routine of rolling over and going back to sleep and waking up and rolling over, it's about 10. I potter about getting dressed, then decide to curl my hair. This goes well, I don't grill my fingers even once, and the hairspray smelled good.

(I kind of wonder what possessed me to use Daiso hairspray which I have never tested on my good hair day, because it could have been mass horror involving, at worst, staining my new dress and murdering my hair and being late for work, but it turned out well anyway.)

Then it starts dawning upon me that my shoes are going to be the death of me today if I don't do anything about them, because my toes are screaming bloody violent infanticide and feeling like the last few packets of chips left on the shelf which nobody ever buys because they're all broken into tiny bits.

(In case anyone was wondering why I am taking the train from Kembangan: you are not alone. I don't know why I do this, but according to my siblings it is faster than training from Eunos, because the bus to Eunos station goes a roundabout way.

I'd just been SMSing Linus about dinner and the two of them appear, like magic, like this day refuses to let me even start being sad. They laugh me all the way to the escalator and I am jettisoned off toward Bras Basah Complex.

I reached Bugis in good time, but then I have to somehow crunch along on my squished-chip toes to the shop. This is extremely harrowing, but I catch myself in the glass of the MRT station and at least I am taking small dainty steps and the shoes look good.

I am due to have lunch with SH, which I more or less forgot about. Today I am not fated to mope around in solitude at all.

I am thinking about them now, too. It is starting to sting, like (I fail to think of a better metaphor) having to wear painful shoes again after taking them off and running barefoot for a while. The raw bits and blisters are a familiar hurt and you want new shoes, desperately.

Okay, it was drawn out a lot longer and involved a lot more hobbling than is accurately represented there.

I ended up sitting on the floor of thirtysix, waiting for SH (who's part of my battalion of indecisive friends constantly wracked by choices) to finish deciding which camera to buy.

When I reached Cat Socrates and the wonderful staff plonked my latte down in front of me, pain or panic made me so desperate I was taking huge, hot drafts of it and nothing felt more satisfying.

And then it was 5 and Jason arrived. (His taking almost 2 hours to get there can be attributed to the National Library.)

I'd booked The King's Speech at 6.40, which on hindsight might have been the most awful movie possible, because I spent the next 5 hours being whined at. It is totally beyond me how anyone can prefer to watch Green Hornet or Rite over The King's Speech, but there you have him.

There is this ongoing Kit Chan craze amongst the choristers (I AM STILL PEEVED AND JEALOUS THAT I DID NOT GET TO GO.) so Jason walked and I limped around Bras Basah looking for her 2008 album.

Apart from the whining which has remained horrifically constant apart from getting more expansive and eloquent, it was just odd being out with Jason, who has changed so much he doesn't recognise me any more.

I heard something cracking when he told me he'd rather be at home doing his tutorials, and I can tell you they did not come from my (by this time utterly destroyed) toes.

Toes are like bladders in that when they start screaming you can hear nothing else. If my feet had been my bladder, my back teeth would have started swimming.

I finally got the pair of Ripples I have been coveting ever since my last pair disintegrated, but the materialistic happiness was nothing in the shadow of my wonderful non-heel-wearing relief.

The King's Speech was, okay, rather boring, because you know the ending and you know the story and nothing else happened except Helena Bonham Carter being really adorabe, as always. I guess I am still undeniably 18. (Even though I'm almost 20.)

(And yes, my birthday is in November, I know my parents had a lot of fun on Valentine's Day in 1992.)

(This is where it gets crazy maudlin and you can hear my pathetic angst twitching weakly on the floor trying to tell you something important which it doesn't have the words for.)

Before anything: thank you so much for today (even though it was probably awkward torture for you).

On the train ride home, I said: I need to call you Leonardo more often.

And Jason replied: Huh? Why Leonardo?

And that was when I realised that I've been talking to a ghost for the past half a year, someone who doesn't exist any more, who didn't think anything of telling people he loved them and screaming HEY SEXY across the canteen and who'd tear up over SMSes sending him off at the airport and came up with a 30 syllable long nickname for me that neither of us can remember.

(And whom I thought wouldn't have said no to going on a date for Valentine's Day.)

Then I was scared because I didn't know who I was standing next to any more, or where my ghost has gone.

(Jason, I imagine you reading this thinking: Since when did I say all that? God, I used to be so young and stupid, why on earth did I do those things to Sherlyn, not knowing she'd turn out such a crazy bitch? I have definitely been there, stuck with people whom I am tired of and angry with and hurt by who insist that they love me, and I don't know what to say because I have never been able to go back to the time when we were friends.)

Maybe I am reading too much into this, but it's such a simple thing to forget, like how blades are simply really pointy wedges.

I miss you so much I am heartbroken, and deeply afraid of/for this person who has replaced you, or whom I battered you by spite into, or whom I terrified with my overpossessiveness.

I don't know him at all, and I will try my best to love him as I loved you, and be as good a friend as you were to me (but it's so strange and hard not to blame him for losing you, because I cannot bear knowing it's really my fault we have grown apart).

Now all I can do is hold on and wait for time to take my memories or bring yours back.

To everyone else: Now you know. That I am a very hard person to love, but please hold on, because I love you, and I cannot stand losing another friend in this way.

(Ugh yes before anyone asks it's got instead of left because my subconscious desperately clings on to that blade metaphor and wants to say cut.)

Even at this moment I am accidentally ignoring people who are on MSN with me, and not knowing what to get Erickson for his birthday, and not going to sleep so I can have fun tomorrow at dinner, and being grouchy at wife over Thailand trip planning.

(And also there is a really freaky clicking noise coming from behind me and I cannot find its source but it sounds like one of those leggy beetles that come into my house sometimes that I am not on good terms with.)

The next time I will be getting home at a sane hour will be Sunday.

It's very tiring for me to be social and I am not used to it at all.

(And it's scary how people can tell from the way I type LOL that I am tired, grouchy, sad and hungry.)

all i want for valentine's

2011-02-14T01:18:00.002+08:00

This is getting so ridiculous.

I'm half amused, half exasperated by the stupidity of it.

I don't think I can even explain it without collecting all the stupid posts and facebook updates and reproducing them verbatim.

All I want for Valentine's Day is to crush on someone better (and look, there is so much room for that it can't be all that hard).

I am even starting to wish that Mr Crush gets together with the moron he likes so I will stop feeling bad about deriving entertainment from reading their idiotic, self-absorbed blogs and feeling superior.

Please please just let me crush on someone else who isn't so objectively stupid and who likes such an unbelievably retarded girl that I am turning into a bitch deriding them. PLEASE.

I don't want this masochistic mobius strip of misery any more.

I don't care if it's unrequited, I just want a better crush, one whom I like because they are actually good, and who even in their painfully unmine love, likes someone else perfect as well.

Ugh friends stop telling me how much he sucks, I hate myself too. Please.

(And when I wake up it starts all over again.)

boy you left me speechless

2011-02-13T05:15:00.003+08:00

I am pretty sure you don't read my blog, but:

Tenma, good luck for tomorrow!

I really hope I get an elated capslock SMS tomo with you screamingly happy with your success. (And uh sorry I basically dumped you for monday.) Because this will mean two of the sweetest people I know are getting together and it will be adorable like you cannot believe.

I'm clearly high on shoujo manga. I probably only want this because it will help combat the intense depression and suicidal tendencies that will set in on monday.

Today I had wifeys night out and caught Black Swan with wife. It was really freaky. I'm scared of dance people now. I'm scared of toes also. And mirrors. And my mother.

I am planning to try inkblogging soon because the masses of words without any friendly images are (still) upsetting me.

contempt

2011-02-12T14:30:00.004+08:00

It is not worth having all this pent-up contempt. I only have space for loving one person at a time, but I also only have space for hating one person at a time, and I do not give a shit if Mme. Hated reads my blog or not:

Anyone who asks 'why don't people like me?' (in a non-irony-intended way) is a fucking idiot in so many many many ways.

(I assumed everyone who reads my blog is not a fucking idiot and therefore understands why this is so, but then realised that maybe I have to clarify.)

1. Either you really mean it, in which case why would you even think that you are such a wonderful person that nobody can possibly not like you? You are clearly a delusional egoistic martyr-complex-ridden bitch.

2. Or you are just asking to show how pathetic and insecure you are, and therefore you are an even bigger moron because you can't even ask a reasonably pity-inducing question.

Okay, I pity you because you will continue not to have anyone like you because you're a fucktard, but not really, since you evidently deserve it.

God. I cannot believe these people.

If you were planning to ask such a question, just keep quiet and maybe bitch about me behind my back when I'm not around or something, cause as long as I don't hear you nothing will happen.

This is not even counting the horror that is Mme Hated whining nonstop about how she wishes a secret admirer would appear and yell that he wants her to be his valentine during morning assembly.

Oh, and you're going to do what for him? Stand there and look pretty? I don't believe in guys having to do all the work. (And also, you are not that pretty. And you'd probably reject him for your own entertainment anyway, bitch.)

I am also getting very upset at the lack of photos on my blog, so I'll go dig around for some and insert them into the previous very very long post when I can.

<span style="font-weight: bold;">I revoke my decision not to post angst/anger on my blog, because after reading it back, it is starting to be totally unreflective of my life in every way. </span>

Blog sounds like: go out go out ooh school yay work JOY JOY BUSY WHEE oh this person is annoying YAY WORK go out go out

Life is like: ... fuck this shit I don't want to take up I hate you just please don't do this to me I don't want to know but I have to look - oh damn I will not be finishing this lunch either because everything just turned to paper in my mouth hold on hold on hold on.

Let me clarify. I only blog about the good parts. I doubt anyone wants to hear repeatedly how everything is veiled by misery and I can crash hard the moment I remember things I try not to think about.

I need to get it out of my system, god knows.

and i don't know how i could do without

2011-02-12T03:07:00.006+08:00

Just think: at this very moment the person meant for you is walking the earth. ♥

No, I can't really believe that, it sucks being a cynic sometimes.

TGIF. Seriously. I think I've have /wristed to death long ago if not for weekends and not having school/work.

Today was not (as) bad, I am starting to learn where all the books are and more people asked me about guitar and piano stuff I actually knew about, so I was less blunderingly incompetent.

(I am not very sure whether it is prudent to blog about this but I have nothing bad to say about anything other than my lack of service skills, because they've all been awesome, so I shall just go ahead.)

I managed to corrupt the cash register within 15 minutes of stepping into the shop this morning so it's being weird. Growly noises whenever I press things. And also I forgot to switch the poor abandoned lights off before leaving. (And I feel like I forgot something today but don't know what it is.)

It's still better than yesterday which was first-day-panicky-stressful-hell with bouts of gloom because people kept taking ages to reply my SMSes, or not at all.

I swear from now onwards I will dedicate myself to replying every single SMS as soon as I read it, because replying SMSes is SRS BIZNESS. I know my personal happiness levels are proportional to the number of combined SMSes/Facebook updates/@mentions I get, there is no point denying it: I am turning into a first class social feed maniac.

I had a really awfully angsty post about non-work stuff (mostly, about how being ignored sucks) during lunch* but accidentally closed my Bloggeroid before it uploaded properly, so it's gone.

(Thank goodness, reading angst posts gets everyone worried and I don't know how to tell them that it doesn't matter if they worry or not because my mood balances on only one person at a time and basically, thanks for the thought but I don't care.)

Anyhow, my main motivation for this job was getting to work in a music shop and meet a lot of cool people, and this was a very good foresight.

I could have done admin and stuff and learn nothing, or sales in other places and be sad - selling beauty products is bottom on my personal list of fulfilment, followed by maybe food or souvenirs, which I know probably doesn't apply for other people.

I could also do random freelance like writing and photog, but I am evidently terrible with people at the moment and too anal/OCD to produce anything on quota. (I want to try this in the future though.)

And also I have no teaching skills whatsoever so the more lucrative 'professions' like tutoring (hi I failed everything, put your kid in my good hands!) are out.

Working in a cute cafe/bookstore like Cat Socrates would take all the magic out of the place, so I'd rather not.

Being on the staff of a music shop is therefore, by elimination, awesome.

(Yes, this is how Erickson and I concluded that playing RO is awesome as well.)

Not to say that it is only awesome by elimination, but this is just the easiest-explained progression. I shall try to explain the awesomeness directly now.

It's really a bit scary imagining how many amazing musicians are just walking around looking like normal people.

I key in stacks and stacks of Grade 4393920 Cheemo Instrument scores every day (uh, out of two days, but whatever) and think: these scores are going to someone's house where they will be pored over intensely for the next few months.

Then this someone will go take their piano/violin/cello/harp**/sexyphone/whatever exam and pass it, and they will be even cooler than before. (And they all think nothing of it.)

I kind of suck. And I kind of feel like buying a lot of books, but then I'd have no time to read them properly.

I so want to learn piano now - the shop has enough piano instructionals to last you at least a decade - but the pianos in the shop are insanely expensive (like small apartment expensive) and it's kind of embarrassing being at the piano when all these music teachers and conductors and imba people come in (although they are all very kind).

It is kind of okay though, because at least I feel helpful.

Today I actually borderline-coherently talked this guy and his son into getting useful beginner guitar books (I actually felt quite like buying them after recommending them to him), and this other guy into buying little kids' piano books (he came at 7.29pm which is one minute before closing time and I think I messed up the accounts because of this but oh well).

(Of course in between that were a lot of mistakes and crawling around the shop detecting for the stupid light switch but besides those.)

It's very nice knowing people are picking up music, and imagining them being crazy good musicians in a few years' time and feeling generally content.

Oh, also, today I helped some 1337 guitar dude find his book in 2 seconds flat (I'd just been staring at it in the guitar section in the morning) and this made me happy and feel highly impressive. Or something, because the regular staff can all do it in 0.19383 seconds.

My job satisfaction pretty much outweighs the horror of when I forget stuff.

I can also weirdly feel myself becoming more extroverted, having to be nice to so many people (for me; it's really only like 4 actual people per day) all the time.

And I'm not scared of other salespeople any more. (And it's only my second day wtf.) I used to be, a bit.

Oh, and I AM SO %#^@*# THANKFUL FOR MY BOSS. He is the most patient and reassuring and friendly and understanding person to be taught by, ever. (This may not still hold tomorrow when he finds out about the weird accounting from this afternoon, but let's take it one step at a time.)

If you happen to read this please don't say you read it because it's awkward, thanks man.

I really hope someone buys the big piano while I'm still working here. (Odd wish but true.)

By the way, please sign your visa receipts with the same signatures, because if they're different, people like me will kena. :/

Most critically, one thing I want to add to my resolutions for this year is:

Don't be afraid of making mistakes. Because diminishing returns apply negatively too, I suppose.

Today EH and I joined Linus + awesome cousins for drinks at Orgo (RAVE GOOD!) after dinner and it was magnificent, but I'm headachey and tired and need to sleep now. Oh shit, blog post accumulation again.

Note to self to blog about:

My hot date with Alicia
Dinner with Linus & Co.
Twitter & why the word 'mercenary' is my full profile for @minteevee

I am determined to get every good part of my life down somewhere, so I won't ever think that this time was a waste. And since it makes me happy when I know people are happy going out with me, I assume the people I am blogging about feel the same way, so it's all good.

*I have got to learn not to read anything that might upset me during lunch, or I will keep losing weight until one day I keel over and blurble BEEF HOR FUN BEEF HOR FUN to a horrible drooly death.

**I am very puzzled by harps. We have exactly ONE harp book in the whole shop, which I found today, and this is most bewildering.

older than the sea

2011-02-11T18:16:00.001+08:00

I am kind of grateful that I keep accidentally losing my angsty posts after submitting them so they hardly ever come out.

she fills my heart

2011-02-10T21:52:00.003+08:00

I started work today!

I am very sleep deprived and spent the whole day running on caffeine and I can feel my heart pounding irregularly right now!

It is kind of okay because the boring bits are really boring and the exciting bits are very exciting (everyone calls at once and there are 40000 things to remember when anyone buys anything) and having had 18.5 years of this I am sort of not very surprised!

Today the first call my boss answered was someone ordering Jaakobin scores for SYF. And later when I was in the stockroom I found a pile of lonely Everyone Sang scores.

(I take this as a mixed sign because Jaakobin signals bad stuff about to happen - not in the least being about to have a sore throat from sliding - and Everyone Sang signals good things - like being about to ace a lit assignment because they set us that bloody poem again.)

I feel like buying everything. Scores are alluring. Aaagh no money ;_;

from the first time

2011-02-08T21:46:00.002+08:00

I am ridiculously excited about my job.

This is probably because if I don't get out of the house soon I will meld into my bed and people will have to graft new skin for my sides.

月亮代表我的水泡

2011-02-08T17:16:00.004+08:00

I am learning guitar very very slowly.

Firstly, bar chords are what separate the real guitarists from their fingers.

I demand to know why anyone would conceivably write a tab with ridiculous shit like DADGAD tuning + F#sus4/C# chords in it (if you were wondering, it just becomes bar on 4th fret).

Think huge blistery doom. (And I can't do anything about it because they purportedly already made the action lower.)

Not to mention the tabs Chunyong gave me for Snow Dance are very likely to be wrong (thus my confusion and self-doubt and eventual abandonment of the first guitar part) so I'm sitting around still trying to get the strumming pattern for Lucky. (I don't know why I just cannot play it, end.)

Every time my finger hurts (I'm now roasting my index finger on the air vent of my laptop because it's warm and makes me feel better), an entire chorus of people yell at me until I dare not tell anyone it hurts.

It's scary, the number of people who are just sitting around in my head talking to me.

Every time I use the word 'separate':

1. I hear Erickson's voice in my head going 'yah it is because back in Indonesia we learn English by pure memorisation that is why my pronunciation is not that good'.

2. Followed by Linus screaming 'MATHEMATICAL BEAUTY' in Erickson's accent.

Please go to NS, mental friends. Pun intended.

And I think it's hopeless on the Kimmy-dori front because I don't even understand what the tabs are saying.

On the bright side, I can more or less play the second guitar for Snow Dance as long as nobody glares at me when I take 5 seconds to change from Dm7 to (the bar chord version of) G. >_>

do you ever feel like a plastic bag

2011-02-08T01:24:00.004+08:00

I am starting to really dislike Glee covers.

Dislike the way they make everything higher keyed.

Dislike the way the vocals are saccharine.

Dislike the way the background sounds are ridiculously boring.

Dislike they way everything becomes teenybop-coloured.

Dislike the way all the covers start sounding the same.

Really, really dislike Lea Michele's stupid Disney voice.

But without the Glee covers I'd never appreciate how good the original songs are in comparison, so it's okay, I guess.