:: oneforsorrow ::

Sunday, October 25, 2009

odac people make me depressed. today traipsed through about 10km of east coast park, some wilderness (apparently they opened up a stretch of park connector and then made it lead to a dead end) and highway and a construction site and felt all tired and accomplished when we reached city hall. then got home and realised odac people go on 30km walks for fun. what the hell. bet they have proper roads and everything.

odac is not a club, it's a sport or performing art or some weird shit.

and according to wushu person wushu should be a performing art which is true.

why does pw bring out martyr complexes in 304? why is my darling black ghost knife so damn adorable? how many roads must a man walk down? actually, why questions are making me fucking depressed now thanks to emofying ki paper. PENIS.

RuNDaRiA;
4:09:00 AM
// // //whyaretheresomany//songsaboutrainbows//andwhat'sontheotherside?//rainbowsarevisions//butonlyillusions//andrainbowshavenothingtohide// //sowe'vebeentoldandsomechoosetobelieveit//iknowthey'rewrong,waitandsee//somedaywe'llfindit,therainbowconnection//thelovers,thedreamersandme// //whosaidthateverywish//wouldbeheardandanswered//whenwishedonthemorningstar?//somebodythoughtofthat//andsomeonebelievedit//andlookwhatit'sdonesofar// //what'ssoamazingthatkeepsusstargazing//andwhatdowethinkwemightsee?//somedaywe'llfindit,therainbowconnection//thelovers,thedreamersandme// //allofusunderitsspell//weknowthatit'sprobablymagic// //haveyoubeenhalfasleep//andhaveyouheardvoices//i'veheardthemcallingmyname//isthisthesweetsound//thatcallstheyoungsailors//thevoicemightbeoneandthesame// //i'veheardittoomanytimestooignoreit//it'ssomethingthati'msupposedtobe//somedaywe'llfindit//therainbowconnection//thelovers,thedreamersandme.// //

Tuesday, October 20, 2009

listslistslists.

why i want 2010:

more money at cny.
homerooms.
riva.
i get to use my cute new organiser.
new chances.
no more chinese/pw.
i'll be the age i pretended to be to trick online guys.
last year of crazy stress and mugging. must savour.
prospect of freedom!

why i don't want 2010:

older. WHY AM I SO OLDDDDDDD
half the class will be gone.
crazy stress and mugging.
omg maybe i'll be too used to mugging and can't cope with not doing anything after As.
no time to work on anything fun.

things i love:

chantelle. <3
black ghost knife.
my own handwriting (i feel like a crazy shit now).
reading a book leaning over a railing at least 4 stories up.
self-imposed mental restraints.

RuNDaRiA;
11:34:00 PM
// // //whyaretheresomany//songsaboutrainbows//andwhat'sontheotherside?//rainbowsarevisions//butonlyillusions//andrainbowshavenothingtohide// //sowe'vebeentoldandsomechoosetobelieveit//iknowthey'rewrong,waitandsee//somedaywe'llfindit,therainbowconnection//thelovers,thedreamersandme// //whosaidthateverywish//wouldbeheardandanswered//whenwishedonthemorningstar?//somebodythoughtofthat//andsomeonebelievedit//andlookwhatit'sdonesofar// //what'ssoamazingthatkeepsusstargazing//andwhatdowethinkwemightsee?//somedaywe'llfindit,therainbowconnection//thelovers,thedreamersandme// //allofusunderitsspell//weknowthatit'sprobablymagic// //haveyoubeenhalfasleep//andhaveyouheardvoices//i'veheardthemcallingmyname//isthisthesweetsound//thatcallstheyoungsailors//thevoicemightbeoneandthesame// //i'veheardittoomanytimestooignoreit//it'ssomethingthati'msupposedtobe//somedaywe'llfindit//therainbowconnection//thelovers,thedreamersandme.// //

Wednesday, October 14, 2009

choir humor. disturbingly true and funny. (only altos' #7 is totally untrue, hurr.)

RuNDaRiA;
2:24:00 AM
// // //whyaretheresomany//songsaboutrainbows//andwhat'sontheotherside?//rainbowsarevisions//butonlyillusions//andrainbowshavenothingtohide// //sowe'vebeentoldandsomechoosetobelieveit//iknowthey'rewrong,waitandsee//somedaywe'llfindit,therainbowconnection//thelovers,thedreamersandme// //whosaidthateverywish//wouldbeheardandanswered//whenwishedonthemorningstar?//somebodythoughtofthat//andsomeonebelievedit//andlookwhatit'sdonesofar// //what'ssoamazingthatkeepsusstargazing//andwhatdowethinkwemightsee?//somedaywe'llfindit,therainbowconnection//thelovers,thedreamersandme// //allofusunderitsspell//weknowthatit'sprobablymagic// //haveyoubeenhalfasleep//andhaveyouheardvoices//i'veheardthemcallingmyname//isthisthesweetsound//thatcallstheyoungsailors//thevoicemightbeoneandthesame// //i'veheardittoomanytimestooignoreit//it'ssomethingthati'msupposedtobe//somedaywe'llfindit//therainbowconnection//thelovers,thedreamersandme.// //

Thursday, October 08, 2009

500 days of summer is a movie that makes you realise (well, made me realise) that most of the rottentomates reviewers are probably guys. because it's just a huge depressing guilt trip plus you get to watch guys you previously had some modicum of respect for wallow in their own self-pity, from what i read of the synopsis, and i can't do anything about it.

stupid stupid stupid. i'm in a very bad phase now where everything looks fake-shiny and scraped off in places. the other day i read the time traveller's wife which is one of my best feel-good books. it was rather depressing about when i realised the entire thing's just a rather interesting love story, the female lead's actually damn annoying and whiny*, the sex is a lie, and all the obscure references to philo/psycho/music make it sound atas and GOD THE CONVERSATIONS WHEN CLARE WAS YOUNG DRIVE ME NUTS NOW because they actually SOUND LIKE THING THAT COULD COME OUT FOR KI LONG CRIT QUESTIONS. and then i start mentally criticising them and then worry about ki which is driving me insane even though i think my long crit section was not bad, my essay was full of crap etc etc.

so i'm banking on NOT reading neil gaiman when i'm in this mood in case it screws me up further and then i'll never be able to touch a book again.

things of note i bought this week would be two notebooks (no pun intended), paprika (i still have fma's dvd that makes me want to sleep), a bloody adorable tiny 110 film camera (the film is so aggravatingly ex), lots of chocolate. paprika is turning out marginally more interesting than the anime movie but that might be because i'm deriving my own entertainment from it.

so damn broke now, brs shipping's 40 bucks which i cannot pay and am dreading to see what the thing looks like. i think tessie's supplier just plain hates vocaloid, really, need to sell off zm's sorry and unusable wig before i can pay akai back.

in other news, i went to kino today and saw wuthering heights in a stack next to the twilight books. they gave it a new cover that looks exactly like one of the twilight series. my esteem of wh cannot drop any lower, i swear. now i know i'm trying to analyse what was, in the 1800s, the (to vaguely refer to a slam i read) cutting-edge masturbatory fiction that is what twilight is to teenage girls nowadays. it's just too bad i never realised bella read wuthering heights before taking lit, or i'd have turned and run and taken history like a good sane girl.

*but sherlyn, that's why the book is realistic! the annoying whiny female lead connects with the annoying whiny female in us all! YES, I KNOW, BUT SHE COULD BE LESS ANNOYING ABOUT IT. i'm more irritated by myself for not realising she's annoying and whiny earlier, really.

RuNDaRiA;
10:29:00 PM
// // //whyaretheresomany//songsaboutrainbows//andwhat'sontheotherside?//rainbowsarevisions//butonlyillusions//andrainbowshavenothingtohide// //sowe'vebeentoldandsomechoosetobelieveit//iknowthey'rewrong,waitandsee//somedaywe'llfindit,therainbowconnection//thelovers,thedreamersandme// //whosaidthateverywish//wouldbeheardandanswered//whenwishedonthemorningstar?//somebodythoughtofthat//andsomeonebelievedit//andlookwhatit'sdonesofar// //what'ssoamazingthatkeepsusstargazing//andwhatdowethinkwemightsee?//somedaywe'llfindit,therainbowconnection//thelovers,thedreamersandme// //allofusunderitsspell//weknowthatit'sprobablymagic// //haveyoubeenhalfasleep//andhaveyouheardvoices//i'veheardthemcallingmyname//isthisthesweetsound//thatcallstheyoungsailors//thevoicemightbeoneandthesame// //i'veheardittoomanytimestooignoreit//it'ssomethingthati'msupposedtobe//somedaywe'llfindit//therainbowconnection//thelovers,thedreamersandme.// //

Saturday, October 03, 2009

realised iphone can't type in the stupid post box. fail. (which gives me something to say so i can continue not mugging, so lalala posting posting)

RuNDaRiA;
12:31:00 PM
// // //whyaretheresomany//songsaboutrainbows//andwhat'sontheotherside?//rainbowsarevisions//butonlyillusions//andrainbowshavenothingtohide// //sowe'vebeentoldandsomechoosetobelieveit//iknowthey'rewrong,waitandsee//somedaywe'llfindit,therainbowconnection//thelovers,thedreamersandme// //whosaidthateverywish//wouldbeheardandanswered//whenwishedonthemorningstar?//somebodythoughtofthat//andsomeonebelievedit//andlookwhatit'sdonesofar// //what'ssoamazingthatkeepsusstargazing//andwhatdowethinkwemightsee?//somedaywe'llfindit,therainbowconnection//thelovers,thedreamersandme// //allofusunderitsspell//weknowthatit'sprobablymagic// //haveyoubeenhalfasleep//andhaveyouheardvoices//i'veheardthemcallingmyname//isthisthesweetsound//thatcallstheyoungsailors//thevoicemightbeoneandthesame// //i'veheardittoomanytimestooignoreit//it'ssomethingthati'msupposedtobe//somedaywe'llfindit//therainbowconnection//thelovers,thedreamersandme.// //

Friday, October 02, 2009
what am I DOING?

RuNDaRiA;
12:11:00 AM
// // //whyaretheresomany//songsaboutrainbows//andwhat'sontheotherside?//rainbowsarevisions//butonlyillusions//andrainbowshavenothingtohide// //sowe'vebeentoldandsomechoosetobelieveit//iknowthey'rewrong,waitandsee//somedaywe'llfindit,therainbowconnection//thelovers,thedreamersandme// //whosaidthateverywish//wouldbeheardandanswered//whenwishedonthemorningstar?//somebodythoughtofthat//andsomeonebelievedit//andlookwhatit'sdonesofar// //what'ssoamazingthatkeepsusstargazing//andwhatdowethinkwemightsee?//somedaywe'llfindit,therainbowconnection//thelovers,thedreamersandme// //allofusunderitsspell//weknowthatit'sprobablymagic// //haveyoubeenhalfasleep//andhaveyouheardvoices//i'veheardthemcallingmyname//isthisthesweetsound//thatcallstheyoungsailors//thevoicemightbeoneandthesame// //i'veheardittoomanytimestooignoreit//it'ssomethingthati'msupposedtobe//somedaywe'llfindit//therainbowconnection//thelovers,thedreamersandme.// //

Thursday, October 01, 2009

ogods this is so ironic it isn't even funny.

RuNDaRiA;
3:42:00 AM
// // //whyaretheresomany//songsaboutrainbows//andwhat'sontheotherside?//rainbowsarevisions//butonlyillusions//andrainbowshavenothingtohide// //sowe'vebeentoldandsomechoosetobelieveit//iknowthey'rewrong,waitandsee//somedaywe'llfindit,therainbowconnection//thelovers,thedreamersandme// //whosaidthateverywish//wouldbeheardandanswered//whenwishedonthemorningstar?//somebodythoughtofthat//andsomeonebelievedit//andlookwhatit'sdonesofar// //what'ssoamazingthatkeepsusstargazing//andwhatdowethinkwemightsee?//somedaywe'llfindit,therainbowconnection//thelovers,thedreamersandme// //allofusunderitsspell//weknowthatit'sprobablymagic// //haveyoubeenhalfasleep//andhaveyouheardvoices//i'veheardthemcallingmyname//isthisthesweetsound//thatcallstheyoungsailors//thevoicemightbeoneandthesame// //i'veheardittoomanytimestooignoreit//it'ssomethingthati'msupposedtobe//somedaywe'llfindit//therainbowconnection//thelovers,thedreamersandme.// //